Katybaby87
Well-Known Member
- Joined
- May 12, 2017
- Messages
- 201
- Reaction score
- 0
how do you all deal with busybody annoying people who judge everything about your pregnancy and tell you what you should be doing/thinking/feeling?
On a Friday a bunch of people from work go to the pub after work l- just a casual anyone can turn up type thing. So last night I went and the first thing someone said to me was “can I just ask what we’re you thinking??•” (you’ll have to imagine the shocked tones!) like wtf has it got to do with this random woman from work that I don’t even really know. Then she was questioning that we’re not finding out the gender. Honestly never knew it would be so controversial with 95% of the people we’ve told. “Oh but otherwise you can’t buy anything for the baby until it’s born” “unisex clothes are all grey” “i can’t knit anything unless I know pink or blue”... clearly I’m on another planet but I think kids are kids and if I have a girl and she wants to wear dinasours why not?! We have loads of nice baby things that are colourful and have animals on and why can’t you knit in yellow, or green, or multicoloured if it offends you so much that on some days my
Boy might wear pink?
When I told my team I was pregnant before Christmas one of the ladies was straight away saying I shouldn’t have told them because I wasn’t 12 weeks and how stupid was that and everyone waits until 12 weeks... I was 11+4 and had had 4 scans by then so I knew everything was going well but why should I justify it?! Then the next day I was going for pizza after work and she was like well you know you won’t be able to do that when the baby comes... what eat pizza is banned? Or going outside? It’s not even like I go out often and I never really drank before the pregnancy so it’s not like I need to make massive lifestyle changes
and, why is it as soon as people find out your pregnant the first thing they do is start telling you their traumatic labour story and how you can’t possibly imagine the pain / how much sleep you’re not going to get. Literally had a conversation with a friend who was trying to tell me to be scared of labour because it hurts so much I should start worrying now. I was like erm there are so many things that could go wrong for me in the next 6 months I think I’ll save the worrying for you know keeping the baby alive long enough to get to labour. It’s like there’s 3 types of mums - the ones that want to scare you, the competitive ones that want to tell you how they had a 72hr natural birth and conceived in 6 seconds and then the nice ones that are supportive and actually tell you useful things
Then there’s the well meaning but factually incorrect people like my mother who within ( mins of finding out I was pregnant decided the consultants were wrong to want to induce me at 38 weeks because the baby’s lungs won’t have developed. Again, I think the consultants might know more than you and they wouldn’t do it without a bloody good reason! Then the next week she was telling me I have to be induced at exactly 38 weeks or the baby will die because she read it online. Ffs it can be anywhere up to 38+6 according to the actual doctor but of course she knows best...
That’s without all the extra shit I seem to get because of my diabetes “oh so you’ll have to have a c-section then” “you’ll give birth to a 10 pounder” “aren’t you worried your baby will have diabetes” “yeah but a cake won’t affect your blood sugar” seriously either do some research, ask, or just fuck off!
Sorry, not slept this week and it’s so exhausting not reacting to people’s annoying comments. I know they mean well but it’s so ignorant and unhelpful and from people that have been through it so must surely know how annoying it is! I need some good sentences to shut people down when they get like this so I don’t get to my third trimester and start punching people
On a Friday a bunch of people from work go to the pub after work l- just a casual anyone can turn up type thing. So last night I went and the first thing someone said to me was “can I just ask what we’re you thinking??•” (you’ll have to imagine the shocked tones!) like wtf has it got to do with this random woman from work that I don’t even really know. Then she was questioning that we’re not finding out the gender. Honestly never knew it would be so controversial with 95% of the people we’ve told. “Oh but otherwise you can’t buy anything for the baby until it’s born” “unisex clothes are all grey” “i can’t knit anything unless I know pink or blue”... clearly I’m on another planet but I think kids are kids and if I have a girl and she wants to wear dinasours why not?! We have loads of nice baby things that are colourful and have animals on and why can’t you knit in yellow, or green, or multicoloured if it offends you so much that on some days my
Boy might wear pink?
When I told my team I was pregnant before Christmas one of the ladies was straight away saying I shouldn’t have told them because I wasn’t 12 weeks and how stupid was that and everyone waits until 12 weeks... I was 11+4 and had had 4 scans by then so I knew everything was going well but why should I justify it?! Then the next day I was going for pizza after work and she was like well you know you won’t be able to do that when the baby comes... what eat pizza is banned? Or going outside? It’s not even like I go out often and I never really drank before the pregnancy so it’s not like I need to make massive lifestyle changes
and, why is it as soon as people find out your pregnant the first thing they do is start telling you their traumatic labour story and how you can’t possibly imagine the pain / how much sleep you’re not going to get. Literally had a conversation with a friend who was trying to tell me to be scared of labour because it hurts so much I should start worrying now. I was like erm there are so many things that could go wrong for me in the next 6 months I think I’ll save the worrying for you know keeping the baby alive long enough to get to labour. It’s like there’s 3 types of mums - the ones that want to scare you, the competitive ones that want to tell you how they had a 72hr natural birth and conceived in 6 seconds and then the nice ones that are supportive and actually tell you useful things
Then there’s the well meaning but factually incorrect people like my mother who within ( mins of finding out I was pregnant decided the consultants were wrong to want to induce me at 38 weeks because the baby’s lungs won’t have developed. Again, I think the consultants might know more than you and they wouldn’t do it without a bloody good reason! Then the next week she was telling me I have to be induced at exactly 38 weeks or the baby will die because she read it online. Ffs it can be anywhere up to 38+6 according to the actual doctor but of course she knows best...
That’s without all the extra shit I seem to get because of my diabetes “oh so you’ll have to have a c-section then” “you’ll give birth to a 10 pounder” “aren’t you worried your baby will have diabetes” “yeah but a cake won’t affect your blood sugar” seriously either do some research, ask, or just fuck off!
Sorry, not slept this week and it’s so exhausting not reacting to people’s annoying comments. I know they mean well but it’s so ignorant and unhelpful and from people that have been through it so must surely know how annoying it is! I need some good sentences to shut people down when they get like this so I don’t get to my third trimester and start punching people