*September 2020 Mummies*

[Natalie8964]

I’m
Just hopping on here after a bit of thread stalking.
1. There’s pretty good evidence behind eating dates
2. Birthing on your back makes you more likely to tear, be on your knees, squatting, standing, pool - that’ll help.
3. Engage with your midwife when babes head is crowning. There will be a demon on your shoulder screaming at you to push push push when growing but you need to lock eyes on your midwife and listen to “blow blow blow” instead. I believe this is crucial to helping to minimise perineal trauma. I’ve not really read many studies on it, but as a midwife I always have a serious chat with the ladies in labour (whilst they still want to talk to me) about the importance of this stage and they all listen. Due to this I have precious little experience in suturing as nearly every woman whose baby I’ve caught has had an in-tact perineum. It’s kind of about fighting that instinct to push through the burn and breathe your baby’s head out - believe me your body will be wanting to do otherwise. I hope that helps xx

Sorry for jumping in on the thread but thank you this gives me great confidence in the research ive done so far. Is it possible for that part to be observed with a water birth? As that's what I'm hoping for, but would love that sort of guidance to prevent any more damage than there needs to be! X

 

[Princess81]

Sorry for jumping in on the thread but thank you this gives me great confidence in the research ive done so far. Is it possible for that part to be observed with a water birth? As that's what I'm hoping for, but would love that sort of guidance to prevent any more damage than there needs to be! X

Yes, midwives use mirrors in the water, and torches to see what is going on. I would also have that chat with the midwifes that are with you in labour, that you would like specific guidance when crowning. Doing little puffy type motions with your mouth really helps to fight that urge to just massively push through it. It’s hard to explain if you’ve never experienced it before, but you’ll understand what I’m going on about when the time comes. X

 

[TTC no2]

Thanks for all those tips @Princess81. I'm making a mental note to come back to it when I'm writing little bits in my birth plan

 

[MelC2011]

Amazing tips @Princess81 thank you

 

[Princess81]

You’re very welcome ladies x

 

[kanga86]

@Princess81 that is so interesting about pushing when crowning, although I have no idea how to fight that push push push urge. My last 2 babies were born in just 2 or 3 pushes each. Is there a way to protect yourself when they are born that quickly? Ironically I had a 2nd degree tear with my 2nd when told to not push and not listen to my body, whereas my 3rd just a graze and he caught the midwives unaware so not time to tell me what to do. I did give birth on my back for both having literally just moved from a kneeling position, so I don't know if that helped.

 

[Princess81]

I guess it’s different for everyone and like I said it’s only in my experience. What I will say is that you’re more likely to tear with your first vaginal birth and less likely with subsequent births. Maybe it’s the shape of your pelvis why it worked that way for you with the descent during kneeling
Anyway; some women naturally feel they want to be sitting / semi recumbent and if that’s the case I’d say to go with how they want to be because that’s what their body wants them to do.
It takes a LOT to fight that immense pressure to just push your way through that burn, I remember it well. However it’s possible to breathe well through it with your little “blows” and tiny pushes and let The perineum stretch and mould. It’s quite remarkable to see. Maybe I should’ve started a study on it x

 

[Natalie8964]

Yes, midwives use mirrors in the water, and torches to see what is going on. I would also have that chat with the midwifes that are with you in labour, that you would like specific guidance when crowning. Doing little puffy type motions with your mouth really helps to fight that urge to just massively push through it. It’s hard to explain if you’ve never experienced it before, but you’ll understand what I’m going on about when the time comes. X

Thank you so much! I'll be sure to mention it in my birth plan! X

 

[SockVortex]

Thank you so much! I'll be sure to mention it in my birth plan! X

As far as I know it’s standard practice in birth as every time I’ve seen an episode of One Born that’s what they tell the lady to do Breathe the head out rather then push.

 

[Kitana]

I don't know how you can fight the urge to push honestly! I think you can with an epidural, although I don't have experience with one. A friend gave birth twice with an epidural and she never felt the urge to push. The midwife had to tell her when to push by looking at the monitor, to get the baby out.
With my second I actively pushed and she was out in 2 pushes, so I think it depends if it's your first or second baby, wide or narrow pelvis, drugged or natural birth. Listen to your body, that's the best advice someone gave me.x

 

[WinterWolf]

I don't know how you can fight the urge to push honestly! I think you can with an epidural, although I don't have experience with one. A friend gave birth twice with an epidural and she never felt the urge to push. The midwife had to tell her when to push by looking at the monitor, to get the baby out.
With my second I actively pushed and she was out in 2 pushes, so I think it depends if it's your first or second baby, wide or narrow pelvis, drugged or natural birth. Listen to your body, that's the best advice someone gave me.x

I had an epidural and I could definitely feel when I needed to push! We all react differently I guess.

 

[Princess81]

As far as I know it’s standard practice in birth as every time I’ve seen an episode of One Born that’s what they tell the lady to do Breathe the head out rather then push.

God don’t watch one born every minute lol! It’s my idea I’d a nightmare! Watch “the baby’s coming” by Virginia Howes on YouTube.

 

[Natalie8964]

God don’t watch one born every minute lol! It’s my idea I’d a nightmare! Watch “the baby’s coming” by Virginia Howes on YouTube.

I second this, much better to search positive birth videos on YouTube. One born is edited and always full of drama! Positive birth videos and stories are so much more amazing

 

[kanga86]

God don’t watch one born every minute lol! It’s my idea I’d a nightmare! Watch “the baby’s coming” by Virginia Howes on YouTube.

I will have to find these as I do find birth fascinating and could do with watching some positive births.

 

[TTC no2]

Oh me too. I love birth video. The human body is totally amazing . Will look that up on YouTube tonite when kids are in bed.

 

[Princess81]

I don't know how you can fight the urge to push honestly! I think you can with an epidural, although I don't have experience with one. A friend gave birth twice with an epidural and she never felt the urge to push. The midwife had to tell her when to push by looking at the monitor, to get the baby out.
With my second I actively pushed and she was out in 2 pushes, so I think it depends if it's your first or second baby, wide or narrow pelvis, drugged or natural birth. Listen to your body, that's the best advice someone gave me.x

I agree that urge to push is overpowering. I birthed without an epidural so I know it well. But honestly, nearly all the women I’ve supported have been able to do it. Yes absolutely I’m an advocate for following your body; it’s what you must do. It’s just that birthing of the head that is often use to have some guidance with xx

 

[Princess81]

Please ignore my typos I promise I can spell

 

[SockVortex]

God don’t watch one born every minute lol! It’s my idea I’d a nightmare! Watch “the baby’s coming” by Virginia Howes on YouTube.

Really? Haha. I've never seen it that way. Perhaps it's because I view things quite analytically. I used it to help decide what kind of things I'd like for Gilly's birth based on how well the labours go etc It didn't frighten me at all.

 

[Kholl]

Search « Natasha hance » on YouTube - Most beautiful birth videos ever and so many of them!

 

[AmyThomas]

Hey ladies, sorry Ive been missing for a few day, been fairly busy. Had a few days at the inlaws at the end of last week. We hadnt seen them since xmas so thought it was about time they got to see DD. They live about 2.5hr drive away, and FIL has recently been diagnosed with Parkinsons so doesnt want to do the drive down (fair enough) so we havent been able to do any garden visits or anything. Fortunately their house is big, so we could keep away, and DD is really good with it. My MIL kept trying to get too close though and blaming it on DD . Why do some people seem to think the rules dont apply to them?! Anyway, 2 days around the MIL and being unable to drink was a struggle. She really tries my patience.

DD has managed to pick up a cold from nursery. To be expected I suppose as they didnt see each other for 3 months. She had a bit of a cough, so I got a bit worried and ordered some covid tests, but she's so full of snot, and the cough comes and goes, so I'm 99% sure its a cold. And shes passed it on to me. Im now snotty and have a really sore throat. Trying to find a remedy thats not a hot toddy and painkillers. Damn plague carrying kids. I never realised how disgusting they were before DD started nursery.

I had an epidural and never really felt the urge to push, had the rely on the MW for that. But after a 2 day induction I was thrilled to get the epidural and have a chance to sleep. I'm after an epidural this time too as I was quite happy with it.

Going to go back and read the messages I've missed, hope you're all ok though. I'm 30+1 now so its sneaking up on me. Cant believe I've only got about 10w to go. Crazy how at the beginning of pregnancy it feels like 9 months is forever, and now its racing by xx