*** April 2018 Mummies ~ Tri 2 ***

[Lander]

Just filled in my application for maternity allowance. The whole pack with two sets of guidance notes is 50 pages.

Thankfully my bit is straight forward. Just need to get a bigger envelope than I have at home and then get it sent off recorded delivery as it has my original MATB1 and four of my old payslips in with it.

 

[Muffinski]

When are we supposed to get our MATB1?? It’s never been mentioned in any of my appointments yet.

 

[Lander]

When are we supposed to get our MATB1?? It’s never been mentioned in any of my appointments yet.

Any time after 20wk. You usually have to ask for it as they're a bit crap about offering it.

I asked for mine at our main desk in ANC straight after my 20wk scan. Lol

 

[Loula]

I got mine at my 25 week appointment. Have a look in your notes it should say there what all your appointments are and what will happen x

 

[Meg86]

When are we supposed to get our MATB1?? It’s never been mentioned in any of my appointments yet.

I had to ask for mine, as I need to give it to my employers with my 15 weeks notice of baby's EDD.

Loula - I love the idea of a Facebook group, sadly though I'm not on Facebook .

Hope everyone is feeling ok - has anyone started getting sick again? I'm mostly sick through the night, I think it's indigestion/really bad reflux - any tips? I'm doing all the small & healthy portions stuff, not eating too late & taking gaviscon... anything g else I should be doing?

Hope you're all having a good week
Mx

 

[cossie13]

I was given mine at 24 week appointment. Apparently they are supposed to offer it at that appointment but if you need it sooner you can request it from 20 weeks onwards.

I've been feeling light headed and very fatigued. I don't think the stress at work is helping. We have a girl in with us at the moment who has problems but not like autistic or anything she just has a troubled background (parents split etc.) but she just causes trouble wherever she goes and no one can control her. Our boss is too nice though, she won't say anything to mum about the possibility of not allowing her at the club because she is a danger to others. She's in every Monday, Wednesday and Friday.

I've been getting really bad heartburn too meg. I'm taking a daily dose of Omeprazole (prescribed by GP pre-pregnancy) and also rennie as and when it's needed. Gaviscon does nothing for me at all other than make me feel queasy. I also find the heartburn is worse when I don't eat. I think it's just a case of finding what works for you!

 

[Loula]

Such a shame meg but we are on here aswell x

 

[mrs_cookie]

I got my matb1 at 24 week appointment too. Need to fill it in and sort my maternity allowence application out!

Im up most nights now with terrible heartburn too Meg,was the same last time but not this early! I just try and prop myself up with pillows as much as possible so im not flat in bed and take Rennie's to try and help. Gavuscon doesnt work for me and the taste makes me gag. Drinking milk sometimes helps xx

 

[Lander]

Posted off my maternity allowance form today.

Have had a horrible headache most of the day. I Think it's hormonal tbh as it feels like bump is having a growth spurt as well.

 

[Meg86]

Thanks for the heartburn advice! I'll try your suggestions x

 

[cossie13]

I think yesterday was probably the worst day I have ever had. We have a girl in the kids club at the moment who is extremely difficult. She upsets the younger children, bugs other children that just want to be left alone and hurls abuse at the adults including her own mother. Her mum came to collect her yesterday and in front of the younger children she started hitting her mum. Hurled abuse left right and centre. She regularly does this but there was something about yesterday that was worse and mum ended up breaking down in tears. A colleague raised her voice and told the girl that her behaviour was unacceptable and that you should never treat your mum like that. I tried to stay out of it. It came to a point where she did it in front of me while I was trying to have a conversation with her mum and I raised my voice also as she wasn't listening to normal reasoning. It did work and she stopped, even for a short period of time. Anyway, my boss came over and told us that we aren't allowed to shout and that we need to deal with it professionally and not as a parent. I ended up going home in tears because how on earth am I supposed to stand by and watch this girl beat her mum and not say anything? We're not allowed to use physical restraint so other than raising voices when nothing else is working what can we do? The whole day and the way my boss seems to want to deal with her has just made me lose my love for the job and I really can't see myself going back there at the end of my maternity leave

 

[Loula]

I do get what your boss has said about the raising of voices etc but we was always shouted at at school and never done us any harm. It's not like there was any physicality. I do think that places are a bit soft at times.
Are there reasons for her to be like that? Has she got an underlying condition at All? If that was my daughter I wouldn't be standing for it at all x

 

[cossie13]

I do get it on a certain level but literally nothing else works with this girl. Her mum has called social services so many times saying she can’t cope but CAHMS have said there’s nothing wrong with her. So there been no official diagnosis just speculation. Her mum has said she tried a smack on the thigh before but all her daughter does is scream that her leg is broken and that she’s calling social services. She’s an 8 year old with the mind of a 18 year old. She knows far too much. It’s heartbreaking x

 

[Loula]

I would just keep taking her to the gp to get a referral because at 8 years old that is not acceptable.

 

[Muffinski]

Thanks, sounds like they should have given me my MATB1 form after my 20 week scan. That was at the start of December, and I have no more appointments until the end of January!! Feels like a big gap. I will ask for it at my next appt.

Cossie, that situation sounds utterly horrendous. How awful! Xx

Does anyone have any recommendations for good nursing bras?

 

[Meg86]

Muffinski- i got some maternity bras from mother care and they were amazing with measuring and advice, she said not to get measured for nursing bras until I was 37 weeks because the baby starts moving downwards so your ribs get smaller again and your cup size will go up. As far as brands go, I have no idea I'm afraid x

 

[stacey2404]

Hey everyone I hope you are all feeling ok. Maternity leave is a nightmare to sort out I've found. My HR wanted my mat b1 before my 20 week scan as well as my intended leaving date. We dont get them here until 24 weeks!

On another not I'm having a bit of a mental breakdown this morning! I'm stressed caused i was in hospital at the start of the week, I have a urine infection and I need a heart scan which is getting done today. Anyway, my son is nearly 4 and when getting ready for nursery this morning was just being particularly difficult, he is going through a really huffy grumpy stage and I lost it with him. I really shouted at him and said that I had a good mind him just leave him at the nursery and not come back. He cried and I feel really awful. I always feel I lack patience and moan at him a lot anyway. I feel like recently he would rather be with his gran than me and I hate that. I love him more than anything the world but sometimes I find it so hard to control my emotions. Now I feel like I must be crazy for thinking i can be a mum to 2 when I can't even manage to look after 1 properly! Am I a terrible mum?! I also said he shouldn't be so cheeky as some people don't even have a mummy and he's lucky to have one that loves him all the while shouting and moaning. I feel like such a failure today. :'(

 

[Loula]

Stacey are you on Facebook? We have a group on there to keep up with each other and rant etc let me know if you want to join.
First of all legally you don't have to tell your employer that you are oregbabt until 25 weeks and matb1 forms are generally given out around the 25 week mark. Check out gov.uk for this and tell them to aswell. I don't know anyone who gets theirs before 20 weeks.

Secondly there are constant battles between me and my 5 year old with getting ready to school and I have said the same on occasions. I have started threatening and saying if you can't behave in the mornings then a box of toys will go or if it's a club night like swimming or dancing then she knows I won't take her It seems to be working. My OH has also had a word.

It's probably your hormones all over the place. Before this pregnancy my periods were every 7 weeks or so and being 28 weeks this week it would have been coming up to one so that's why I've had no patience.
Everything will be ok xxx

 

[cossie13]

Oh Stacey, sounds like you are having a bit of a rough time.

As Loula said, you didn't have to legally tell them until 25 weeks anyway, they should know this!

As for not knowing how you'll cope having 2 kids, I have days like that too. Your son knows you love him. My OH likes to point out that I'm not normally this impatient with him and that it's the pregnancy hormones making things seem worse.

It will be ok in the end hun

 

[mrs_cookie]

Aww Stacey try not to be so hard on yourself everyone loses their temper from time to time and throw hormones in the mix its bound to happen! Your son will love you more than anything no matter what! When i have an off day and snap at Izzy i always just make sure i apologise for it after just like i would expect her to apologise when she loses it with me. I've had to do a lot of apologising to hubby this pregnancy,he seems to be getting the brunt of the hormones bless him! Xx