OH is a weed smoker... advice please.

[hopeandfaithxo]

With tobacco smokers they recommend not getting close to babies for half an hour or so because of the chemicals, imagine how much more stuff there is in weed?

I know.
Basically, I'd suggest doing the set-a-date-together thing maybe. :/ That's all I can suggest for now mdear, good luck though xo

 

[setdse]

I myself have seen what 1 joint an evening does...my sister in hospital with her jaw broken in 3 places, huge gash in her head broken nose( just to name a few injuries)....by some stupid idiot who needs it to "relax"

I saw what he was like when they met. He was lovely...now I don't even know him.

I briefly moved in with my aha for a month or so while I was waiting for my flat to be sorted about 2years ago. He went psyco. And if 1 joint can do that to you then god knows what doing it all the time does. He threatened me numerous times to the point I had to lock myself in my room and then baracade the door whist waiting for the police. Yes I could have left but knowing if I left then my sister would be alone made it akk the more reason to stay. You may call me stupid immature or whatever petty little name u can think of but I had to help her get out. He's ruined his life. Completely. May I also add that sitting in my kitchen whilst he smokes it outside I still got high.it still affected me. The smell from his clothes then brought inside and the transfered it on to furniture and the carpet etc.

I would never subject my child let alone someones child I was looking after to the fumes and toxins.

I look at my little man now.fast asleep.so vonerable.fragile.someone needs to protect these children. And tbh I'd I knew where u lived etc I would not even hesitate to call social services! A kid deserves better!

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[Froslass]

I can think of a lot more fun things to do to help our OH's relax and vice versa....

 

[setdse]

I can think of a lot more fun things to do to help our OH's relax and vice versa....

Here here

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[AugustMum]

.

 

[Georgie0]

children should not be around drugs. End of. What worries me about the comment about looking after children when stoned is not the fact it happened (as it doesn't anymore) it is the attitude that it is ok and actually more fun!!?

 

[littlemiss83]

I'm not really wanting to get into an argument about this, but since everyone else has given their 2p's worth I thought i'd join in.

The thread is very much focused on weed and its bad effects, and I would like to add that alcohol is just as bad as weed, alcohol has the same issues, with becoming addicted, bad for children to be around, is distructive for children to grow up with, ect ect, infact, I actually think alcohol is alot worse than weed, with only the one difference - smoking weed produces fumes and alcohol doesn't.

For all those who dont agree with weed ect, fair do's. I totally understand, I only hope that you hold the same opinions on alcohol. It seems that alot of people (not on this forum btw, just in general) think its ok to have 2/3 glasses of wine every night, or go out once at the weekend and get totally wrecked. A CHILD SHOULD NOT BE BROUGHT UP IN THIS ENVIRONMENT.

I think booze should be illegal, due to the chaos and distruction it causes in families.

Dont get me wrong ladies....i'm not expecting you all to start liking weed, or for you to think its ok that ppl's OH's smoke it. All I wanted to point out is that we need to be open minded to all things that are bad for our children to be around, not just weed.

It would be very unfair for us to give such harsh opinions as expressed above about weed, to the ladies who have said their OH's smoke it, if we ourselves or our OH's drink, in the home.

I know of the dangers of weed, I think everyone does, but I also know of the dangers of booze. I think people are quick to forget the problems it causes just because its legal to drink it.

There was a time, along time ago where weed was legal, it is still legal in some places, even America/California where it is used for medical reasons. Alcohol is illegal in some places and used to be illegal along time ago, so going by whats legal/not legal is not really a good way to look at it.

I think we should all take a moment to think about what goes on in our own lives, for example booze, before slagging off other people for what they do.

Oh and btw I dont smoke or drink.

 

[Hayley1608]

For all those who dont agree with weed ect, fair do's. I totally understand, I only hope that you hold the same opinions on alcohol. It seems that alot of people (not on this forum btw, just in general) think its ok to have 2/3 glasses of wine every night, or go out once at the weekend and get totally wrecked. A CHILD SHOULD NOT BE BROUGHT UP IN THIS ENVIRONMENT.

I agree with this... i guess however that the majority of ladies who have commented on the importance of drugs not being in a childs environment would also feel that it is not safe to expose their child to somebody who has been under the influence of alcohol.

Its about being responsible for a life and protecting it in every way possible... whether that is from drugs or alcohol.

I still however do not believe that weed is acceptable. I would rather my child one day legally and carefully drink than illegally do drugs which they could obtain from any random person and could contain any random and harmful substance. If alcohol was as dangerous as this it would not be sold in supermarkets... a controlled environment. I am not under any circumstances saying that this makes alcohol safe, I am saying that there is a difference between knowing what is in one glass of wine that you have to not having a clue what is in one joint (Not sure if thats what you call it lol!)

xx

 

[FebMum2Be]

There is such a big difference between alcohol and weed. For starters, weed is illegal, drinking in excess, yes can certainly affect your childs life and put yourself and others in danger, but if someone has a glass of wine with their dinner they are bad? You can drive after so many units, I highly doubt the law would allow this if it was dangerous.

People who make arses out of themselves paint a picture for other drinkers, which isn't the case. Some people don't know their limits, which is their own personal doing and up to them. I just don't agree that an illegal substance should be kept in a house that a child lives in, as parents we set an example for our kids, what's that teaching them? What do you do when your child walks in and tells you they're smoking it and that it's ok because mummy/daddy does it?

I personally think there is a big difference between an illegal drug and alcohol.

Would it be acceptable for an 18 year old person to come in with a drink? IMO, yes. As long as they are sensible and don't rip the arse out of it.

Would it be acceptable for an 18 year old person to come in with a bag of grass? I for one certainly wouldn't allow it, and can't compare the 2

 

[setdse]

I may have a glass once in a blue moon when my other half has the night off work and therefore gives me an evening off leaving him to take care of LOs needs etc. This is only ever one glass and I never get to the state of feeling a little bit tipsy!

1 glass/unit/beer will have little effect on your physical and emotional abilities which is why it Is still legal to drive.

1 joint/toke or even being exposed to the fumes makes you illegal to drive etc.

I think this makes a give difference in the comparing of alcohol and weed. Yes alcohol mistreated is bad, but the way I see it is being exposed to the slightest hint of drugs is bad. Iykwim

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[titch]

I drink alcohol but not when Im looking after LO. It was my birthday last weekend and my grandma gave me a bottle of sparkly wine, opened it in the afternoon when we had the cake etc.. but I didnt have a glass (yes one glass) until after Id got LO to bed, and my OH didnt drink at all.

Im going out drinking this weekend and LO is staying at my parents place, and Ill be collecting him on monday. So yes I do drink, but not around my child, not when Im responsibly for my child, and I dont think you can compare that to smoking weed. The social and moral implications alone should be considered when raising your child. Theres no need for me to mention the safety and health implications as thats already been covered plenty, but seriously, think about what youre teaching your child; that its okay not to respect the law, that its okay to fund an illegal trade which takes slaves, funds murderers.... that you dont have to take any responsibility for our society, you can behave any way you like, regardless of the rules, and still expect to be treated with respect. I made my childs life, and I take responsibility for him to be kept safe healthy, and also not to be a drain on society, to make a positive contribution.

 

[littlemiss83]

Thanks Hayley, this is the point I was trying to get across. I'm not siding with anyone, all I wanted to point out is that alcohol is dangerous, wether you think it is less/more dangerous than weed is your own personal opinion.

I suppose one glass of wine isn't going to hurt anyone, and tbh neither is one joint, in respect of what it will do to your body. Unfortunately it is very difficult for people to only have one drink/joint.

The drink drive limit is one unit which i'm not 100% sure about but I think its a quarter of a large glass of wine, so booze obviously effects judgement even after just a little bit. The same judgement which is used while looking after children.

And as I mentioned in my other post, in some countries weed is legal and in some booze isn't. In certain countries it would be bad to have the illegal substance (booze) in one's home. I'm sure they'd hold the same opinions on booze as some people do on weed.

So that innocent glass of wine with dinner, imagine being made to feel like a bad parent or whatever because of that? It wouldn't be nice. But reality is, thats what some people feel about booze, exact same as some people think about weed.

 

[cosmicgirl]

And as I mentioned in my other post, in some countries weed is legal and in some booze isn't. In certain countries it would be bad to have the illegal substance (booze) in one's home..

But it is illegal in this country and like it or not we have to respect the law and teach our children to abide by the law

 

[littlemiss83]

I drink alcohol but not when Im looking after LO. It was my birthday last weekend and my grandma gave me a bottle of sparkly wine, opened it in the afternoon when we had the cake etc.. but I didnt have a glass (yes one glass) until after Id got LO to bed, and my OH didnt drink at all.

Im going out drinking this weekend and LO is staying at my parents place, and Ill be collecting him on monday. So yes I do drink, but not around my child, not when Im responsibly for my child, and I dont think you can compare that to smoking weed. The social and moral implications alone should be considered when raising your child. Theres no need for me to mention the safety and health implications as thats already been covered plenty, but seriously, think about what youre teaching your child; that its okay not to respect the law, that its okay to fund an illegal trade which takes slaves, funds murderers.... that you dont have to take any responsibility for our society, you can behave any way you like, regardless of the rules, and still expect to be treated with respect. I made my childs life, and I take responsibility for him to be kept safe healthy, and also not to be a drain on society, to make a positive contribution.

Yes, we should all be responsible for what we let our children see in the family home, for what we want to teach them is good/bad. This doesn't just go for weed and other drugs, it also goes for other things which could be bad.

 

[FebMum2Be]

Fair do's, as long as there isn't weed around my child, I'm happy enough. I'm not going to comment anymore, feel a bit shit that the thread has went on like this. Maybe we should make a thread for a discussion, after all the OP's intention was to get help..

Apologies OP, and like I said if you have any questions PM me anytime x

 

[littlemiss83]

And as I mentioned in my other post, in some countries weed is legal and in some booze isn't. In certain countries it would be bad to have the illegal substance (booze) in one's home..

But it is illegal in this country and like it or not we have to respect the law and teach our children to abide by the law

Yes but it doesn't mean we should allow our children to see or be around us whilst drinking!

 

[littlemiss83]

Fair do's, as long as there isn't weed around my child, I'm happy enough. I'm not going to comment anymore, feel a bit shit that the thread has went on like this. Maybe we should make a thread for a discussion, after all the OP's intention was to get help..

Apologies OP, and like I said if you have any questions PM me anytime x

Yes, your totally right, this thread went downhill days ago by the looks of it!!

 

[cosmicgirl]

think about what youre teaching your child; that its okay not to respect the law, that its okay to fund an illegal trade which takes slaves, funds murderers.... that you dont have to take any responsibility for our society, you can behave any way you like, regardless of the rules, and still expect to be treated with respect. I made my childs life, and I take responsibility for him to be kept safe healthy, and also not to be a drain on society, to make a positive contribution.

Hit the nail on the head.
I might buy a bottle of wine from little old Doris at Asda every now and again, a bit different from buying a bag of drugs from a scum of the earth dealer

 

[cosmicgirl]

And as I mentioned in my other post, in some countries weed is legal and in some booze isn't. In certain countries it would be bad to have the illegal substance (booze) in one's home..

But it is illegal in this country and like it or not we have to respect the law and teach our children to abide by the law

Yes but it doesn't mean we should allow our children to see or be around us whilst drinking!

My children are not, never have been and never will be around me while I am drinking. My 13 year old has never ever seen me even tipsy. I don't agree with drinking whilst in care of children either!

 

[littlemiss83]

think about what youre teaching your child; that its okay not to respect the law, that its okay to fund an illegal trade which takes slaves, funds murderers.... that you dont have to take any responsibility for our society, you can behave any way you like, regardless of the rules, and still expect to be treated with respect. I made my childs life, and I take responsibility for him to be kept safe healthy, and also not to be a drain on society, to make a positive contribution.

Hit the nail on the head.
I might buy a bottle of wine from little old Doris at Asda every now and again, a bit different from buying a bag of drugs from a scum of the earth dealer

Not all weed comes from a dealer. Wether you drink alcohol around your children is your own personal opinion. Same as smoking weed is to others.