Whilst you've said your partner doesn't smoke around your daughter, are you not TTC (according to your ticker)? What happens when you have a new born if you won't ask him to "quit for life?" Surely he will be around your new born potentially under the influence of cannabis? And if you do have a new born, will you not live together and therefore with your daughter as well, who in turn will also be exposed to his cannabis use? And even if he doesn't smoke it in your house, it must still smell on his clothes, breath, hands? How you and your OH live your lives is entirely up to you but it is ridiculous to compare an illegal drug to alcohol or to say your vice of chocolate is in anyway similar to that of smoking weed to relax after work - I can't understand why anyone would think these are the same thing? And this thread was started because someone who is clearly opposed to having weed around her new born wanted some reassurance that she wasn't nuts to tell him to get lost if he couldn't clean up his act; evidently her views on it were already clear and it was cruel of you to imply she should just put up with it. I understand now that you didn't know the full facts when making this remark but you have brought a lot of this on yourself with your flippant and blase attitude towards illegal substances.