OH is a weed smoker... advice please.

[cosmicgirl]

She doesnt know!!!! she will have the education off me that drugs are not acceptable ! you did make an assumption that i would tell her its acceptable and you used her to push at my feelings

No, I just quoted directly from your text where you said it was acceptable, you said that, not me. I was mearly pointing out that I'd that is your view then it is likely to be your lo's view as they learn by example.

 

[FebMum2Be]

Kirstymichelle, we never argue on here, we listen and give our bit on each side wether we agree or not, think you need to calm down, and be a bit more mature about the situation, people might listen more if you didn't throw your toys out of the pram. This thread isn't about little perfect you unfortunately. Have a bit of respect.

Also hope that along with your daughter not seeing the drugs etc, that she doesn't see/hear your attitude.

 

[kirstymichelle]

and if my daughter lives by my example she will do just fine! because i am a decent , honest , loving . caring woman who HERSELF lives by societies rules and takes great care in those around me be it poor, rich , addict, old, young etc , you dont know me so dont judge me or my values , my OH values are is own and as long as they donyt encroach within the home then thas fine he is his own man

 

[cosmicgirl]

Kirstymichelle, we never argue on here, we listen and give our bit on each side wether we agree or not, think you need to calm down, and be a bit more mature about the situation, people might listen more if you didn't throw your toys out of the pram. This thread isn't about little perfect you unfortunately. Have a bit of respect.

Also hope that along with your daughter not seeing the drugs etc, that she doesn't see/hear your attitude.

x

 

[kirstymichelle]

and you all have stinking attitudes and a few of you i see push women into reactions i will defend my own and my daughter where needed

 

[FebMum2Be]

Well tbh, we didn't know anything about you, until you started telling us how perfect your life and family is, then go on to call us bitchy and throw a tantrum We're all adults here, we're allowed to have different opinions, ask questions, disagree and lots more. It's a public forum, all you had to do was speak in a calm manner instead of SHOUTING IN CAPITAL LETTERS WITH EXCLAMATION MARKS!!!!!!!! I don't take much in when it's like that, I prefer a more mature approach. As said before, I think we should stop now, it was going quiet well even though it was off topic.

 

[Lulabell]

I have looked after children whilst stoned in the past and honestly, it just makes it more fun!

I really dont want to be nasty but I actually find the above quote quite worrying sorry x

Me too, I'm actually lost for words

Have you ever been stoned? Cause if not then you don't know what it's like. Seriously... It isn't that bad... You don't lose your mind and go crazy or anything like that! And the children I looked after were 7 and 9 so it's not like they were babies.........

I have actually, I tried cannabis when I was 17 with friends. I also have seen the psychological damage it can do as part of my job in a hospital. I don't think anyone should look after children under the influence of any kind of drugs, it is so so wrong.

This is not an attack on you but do you include alcohol in this statement? Whether it be half a pint or 5 pints? Only reason I say this is that alcohol is a drug. Again, not attacking. Just asking.x

 

[kirstymichelle]

Yes because people assumed that my daughters life must be awful with a mother like me , i only answered the op with my opinion then it all blew out of the water and people pushed me until in the end i had to get my point accross about my daughter not having it in her home or ever around her because women were insinuating that my daughter would grow up in some horrible home around things she shouldnt be around and made me feel like absolubt shit to the point its had me in floods of tears ,

 

[cosmicgirl]

I have looked after children whilst stoned in the past and honestly, it just makes it more fun!

I really dont want to be nasty but I actually find the above quote quite worrying sorry x

Me too, I'm actually lost for words

Have you ever been stoned? Cause if not then you don't know what it's like. Seriously... It isn't that bad... You don't lose your mind and go crazy or anything like that! And the children I looked after were 7 and 9 so it's not like they were babies.........

I have actually, I tried cannabis when I was 17 with friends. I also have seen the psychological damage it can do as part of my job in a hospital. I don't think anyone should look after children under the influence of any kind of drugs, it is so so wrong.

This is not an attack on you but do you include alcohol in this statement? Whether it be half a pint or 5 pints? Only reason I say this is that alcohol is a drug. Again, not attacking. Just asking.x

hi hun
Not taking it as an attack
I absolutely include alcohol (and any other drugs too) in this statement. I said before, I rarely drink, if i do at a party or something then my mum will have the kids over night, my oh is t total anyway, always has been but I dont drink often at all.
Just that this thread was specifically about weed but hell yeah, looking after kids/being around kids on booze is sh!t too imo - just my opinion and how i want my kids brought up x

 

[Lulabell]

Can I just point out, alcohol is a controlled substance, it's measured in units and tests have been carried out to work out how much is a safe amount. People are allowed units and still be allowed to drive. Weed has no measures, and you aren't allowed to drive after smoking it full stop.

Not attacking but want to point out what is considered safe for one person may not be safe for another. I believe no amount of alcohol should be drunk whilst looking after a baby. My view is if something were to happen and you had to go to hospital. You had one drink but within limit but still had an accident... I would forever be thinking if I hadn't of had that drink maybe it would be dif? Better to be safe then sorry.x

 

[FebMum2Be]

But do you understand if you had of pointed all of that out earlier on in a calm way we all would have known that? I'm sorry you're crying but there was no need for your reaction, we can all disagree, and at the end of the day it's your child, it's not up to us what's going on in your home, but we felt like we had to put a few facts out there from previous experiences.

 

[cosmicgirl]

Can I just point out, alcohol is a controlled substance, it's measured in units and tests have been carried out to work out how much is a safe amount. People are allowed units and still be allowed to drive. Weed has no measures, and you aren't allowed to drive after smoking it full stop.

Not attacking but want to point out what is considered safe for one person may not be safe for another. I believe no amount of alcohol should be drunk whilst looking after a baby. My view is if something were to happen and you had to go to hospital. You had one drink but within limit but still had an accident... I would forever be thinking if I hadn't of had that drink maybe it would be dif? Better to be safe then sorry.x

Agree completely but don't think the two are comparable on all aspects. Alcohol is wrong in large quantities around lo's of course (for me I dont drink any around lo but each to their own) and has health implications but that is imo where the similarity ends for me. I think as I said before about the seedy connections of drugs and criminality also. Studies also show that a relatively small amount of weed can kick of underlying mental problems.

 

[littlemiss83]

Can I just point out, alcohol is a controlled substance, it's measured in units and tests have been carried out to work out how much is a safe amount. People are allowed units and still be allowed to drive. Weed has no measures, and you aren't allowed to drive after smoking it full stop.

Not attacking but want to point out what is considered safe for one person may not be safe for another. I believe no amount of alcohol should be drunk whilst looking after a baby. My view is if something were to happen and you had to go to hospital. You had one drink but within limit but still had an accident... I would forever be thinking if I hadn't of had that drink maybe it would be dif? Better to be safe then sorry.x

Agree completely but don't think the two are comparable on all aspects. Alcohol is wrong in large quantities around lo's of course (for me I dont drink any around lo but each to their own) and has health implications but that is imo where the similarity ends for me. I think as I said before about the seedy connections of drugs and criminality also. Studies also show that a relatively small amount of weed can kick of underlying mental problems.

Studies have also shown the same for booze. No one has ever died of weed - FACT - thousands of people die from alcohol every day.

 

[Hayley1608]

Kirsty Michelle... i feel bad that you have ended up in tears over this.

I would just like to add that if anything I have said has offended you then It was not intended to. I was simply trying to put across my opinion to the OP asking for advice and my comments were not based on anything that you had put about your own situation. People have difference of opinions and i appreciate that yours although not the same as mine has just as much right to be heard.

It a difficult and controversial subject to broach so i understand that there are very mixed responses.

We should remember that all those bad hormones being released from stress and arguing are probably also not too good for our babies!

Maybe we should all chill a bit.

xx

 

[cosmicgirl]

Can I just point out, alcohol is a controlled substance, it's measured in units and tests have been carried out to work out how much is a safe amount. People are allowed units and still be allowed to drive. Weed has no measures, and you aren't allowed to drive after smoking it full stop.

Not attacking but want to point out what is considered safe for one person may not be safe for another. I believe no amount of alcohol should be drunk whilst looking after a baby. My view is if something were to happen and you had to go to hospital. You had one drink but within limit but still had an accident... I would forever be thinking if I hadn't of had that drink maybe it would be dif? Better to be safe then sorry.x

Agree completely but don't think the two are comparable on all aspects. Alcohol is wrong in large quantities around lo's of course (for me I dont drink any around lo but each to their own) and has health implications but that is imo where the similarity ends for me. I think as I said before about the seedy connections of drugs and criminality also. Studies also show that a relatively small amount of weed can kick of underlying mental problems.

Studies have also shown the same for booze. No one has ever died of weed - FACT - thousands of people die from alcohol every day.

People have died from the effects of weed - for example, a lad at our school smoked cannabis and was taken into hospital with paranoia and anxiety attacks, he subsequently killed himself as he was mentally unwel, there was a large piece about him in the papers and how dangerous drugs were to young, developing minds.
I work with lots of people who have drug problems, all different drugs including cannabis, a lot of those people who had underlying mental disorders that they were not aware of have been admitted with triggered disorders such as psychizophrenia and personality disorders brought on by the use of cannabis. This is fact

 

[cosmicgirl]

Each to their own, glad we can discuss these important topics, thats why I love pf, see ya later girlies

 

[Lulabell]

To the OP, I wish your OH all the luck and well done to him for making the choice to quit. It won't be easy but the benefits of quitting will be far better then sticking with the habit. He will be able to cuddle his LO whenever he likes and not worry about fumes ect. Good luck to both of you. He will need your support and from the sounds of it, you will be great at providing it.xx

 

[amyjayne77]

Not gonna get involved but thought this was worth pointing out:

Pregnant women who either use marijuana or who are exposed to second-hand smoke are at a higher level of risk of miscarriage. They are more likely to have complications during labor and delivery.
While the best scenario is to stop using pot before conception occurs, not all pregnancies are carefully planned. Stopping pot use as soon as pregnancy is suspected, if not confirmed, can lower the risk of a negative outcome for a mother-to-be.

 

[Maria1977]

Each to their own, what some enjoy others detest but I think what everyone here defo agrees on is that either drugs (of any kind) or alcohol have no place around children.

Everyone has said that in one way or another and that is the point. The answer to the original post is that your OH is gonna need alot of support coz it's hard to kick any habit, there's not much you can do apart from be there for him when he quits. I think the scan will help bring it home to him that there's actually a baby there and that he has to start acting responsibly.

xxxxx

 

[amyjayne77]

Btw, My dad was a weed user and over the years it messed his head up good and proper. He drank too. Tried to kill us once. For real. I Had to jump out of the bedroom window and get help (aged 8). Not good what that shit does. Never an excuse imo. Just saying.

Lol just said I wasn't going to get involved