Oh Tee, you poor, poor, poor lady.
I am so sorry that as well as having to suffer the heartache of losing your baby, you now have to go through the trauma of birthing.
I hope and pray that they look after you (as they are trained to do!) and that you get through this 'physical' part of your loss as smoothly as you possibly can.
The mental part is going to be so much harder and I hope with your history you are offered couselling and lots of support - if not then someone must demand this for you sweetie. Your Father and partner sound wondeful and I am sure your friends and family will want to rally round you. You do what you need to do - if that means writing things down / being alone / talking about it.. Those that love you will be on hand so make sure you accept their support if you can! Us lot here at PF will do all we can to help darling...
No words can make you feel even a tiny bit better at the moment, but I send you lots of love
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx