can you actually afford to have a baby?

[cosmicgirl]

To be fair the original post mentioned the girl wanting IVF while on benefits. But her partner is doing an apprentiship so is obviously wants to get work so how is that any different from what you are moaning about yes she wants another baby but her partner isn't spongeing like you say. So yeah the ones who have limited few babies are made to feel like they shouldn't have had them and they don't deserve to live.

Frankly this thread in its self is Stupid and it will only go round in circles.

20/06/2012 - Elliott born at 129 x

11/02/2011 - Leo born at 11:37 x

Yes, however, do you know what the standard wage for an apprenticeship is?
From the DirectGov information on it (and heaven knows because I was an apprentice a few years back myself) It is "£2.60 - the apprentice rate, for apprentices under 19 or 19 or over and in the first year of their apprenticeship."

Do you think that it is fiscally responsible of a couple who are on benefits and a £2.60 rate of earnings to be allowed IVF? To be actively TTC?

It's not even enough for a lone adult to survive on, let alone a couple and a child.

Willing to work though the person may be, why then can't they wait until he is gainfully employed and earning at least Adult Minimum wage? I would not for a second support someone choosing to bring a baby into that by an expensive procedure for the NHS, when they will struggle to provide for themselves, let alone a baby.

This doesn't mean I don't support them ever TTC - you may notice I am not a parent yet. I have PCOS and were I to need IVF, I would not do so in that situation. I am going to be WTT for at least 2 more years myself until my life is in a better place before having children, so I know what it is to have to wait for something I want so badly.

I am aware that there are members on this forum who have partners doing apprenticeships, and I'm sure they can tell you how hard it is to get by and how frugal and sacrificing they have to be with it.

Completely agree.

We would love another baby, but have decided to wait until OH has graduated from uni (next year) and is in a stable job.

We have a decent income (£20000a year) from OH's 2 jobs and student bursary and i still worry about money!
We are lucky to have savings and are currently looking for the right place to buy.

Having been through having a baby unexpectedly, trying to get into a better position in 9 months, I cant understand why people would actually plan to have a child when they know once the apprenticeship is finished its going to be a lot less stressful money-wise.

I said that earlier on in this thread, if nothing else, the stress of struggling financially would ruin ttc and babyhood for me xx

It would for me too!

I cant wait to be in a good position, to actually look forward to TTC. I want to look forward to getting a BFP and not dread a second line coming up! x

I can imagine nothing worse, its stressful enough isn't it?
And it's the nice things like buying the stuff you know you don't need but it's nice to indulge xx

It is!

LO was a wee surprise, OH and I were still living with parents. Luckily between us we had enough savings to buy everything we needed, and probably indulge in a few things we didnt.

BUT - the whole moving in togther, unexpected pregnancy, money worries really made what should be an enjoyable exciting time stressful! Our saving went on a years worth of rent, council tax, baby stuff! We cancelled our holidays etc..

Cant wait to not have to think about worrying next time, everything will be set up

I'm sure you will enjoy it 1000 times more xx

 

[Humesy]

yep, and its nice to be able to buy things for your kids that are totally unnecessary but just because u want to?

i cant imagine not being able to treat my lo on occasions. Im not saying thats the be all and end all but its enjoying for me xx

My oh goes mad at me for the number of baby gros and outfits I buy, he rightly says that half of them won't be worn but it's part of the fun isn't it xx

of course!!

theres no greater satisfaction than ripping the tags off a new outfit for a new baby and them just being all 'new' lol yes im sad! but its all part of the fun! xx

 

[cosmicgirl]

yep, and its nice to be able to buy things for your kids that are totally unnecessary but just because u want to?

i cant imagine not being able to treat my lo on occasions. Im not saying thats the be all and end all but its enjoying for me xx

My oh goes mad at me for the number of baby gros and outfits I buy, he rightly says that half of them won't be worn but it's part of the fun isn't it xx

of course!!

theres no greater satisfaction than ripping the tags off a new outfit for a new baby and them just being all 'new' lol yes im sad! but its all part of the fun! xx

Well I'm sad too then, I like sniffing them x

 

[netty]

Yes i agree on that wages are low but its their choice and i can add my comment ladies even if i think its stupid ok not like i quote all of yours

20/06/2012 - Elliott born at 129 x

11/02/2011 - Leo born at 11:37 x

well no love you cant really seeing as if you think peoples views and this thread is stupid you are offending me and all the other ladies here

if you just want to post to say something derogatory then you are breaking forum rules and causing unnecessary friction

i suggest you find a better, less offensive way to join the debate

like the rest of us have done

Hmm r u a 'hidden mod' ? lol

well said x

haha i am not allowed a mod hat! i am too naughty

 

[LikeJohnnYoko]

You know what i have only put across my opinion to be jumped on by the regulars i find this unfair.

20/06/2012 - Elliott born at 129 x

11/02/2011 - Leo born at 11:37 x

No, you are being debated with because you are reducing this interesting debate to your (subjective) opinion that it is "stupid".

Not everyone on this thread is a regular, or is a regular in a different part of the forum from other people involved in this debate. The key characteristic that is binding them together is respectful, healthy debate. Sadly, your posts have been neither so far.

I invite you to give us your opinion on the topic at hand:

"Can you actually afford to have a baby?"

So, can you? Is it something that is financially viable for you right now, are you doing well, or are you struggling? Do you think things would have been better had you waited? If so, why? Do you think in your circumstances it is fair?

I look forward to your response.

 

[Humesy]

yep, and its nice to be able to buy things for your kids that are totally unnecessary but just because u want to?

i cant imagine not being able to treat my lo on occasions. Im not saying thats the be all and end all but its enjoying for me xx

My oh goes mad at me for the number of baby gros and outfits I buy, he rightly says that half of them won't be worn but it's part of the fun isn't it xx

of course!!

theres no greater satisfaction than ripping the tags off a new outfit for a new baby and them just being all 'new' lol yes im sad! but its all part of the fun! xx

Well I'm sad too then, I like sniffing them x

ROFL! yep ur as nuts as me! its that NEW smell! that mixed with the smell of a new babys head ....... xx

 

[Froslass]

I did say even if i never said i did your not reading anything properly

20/06/2012 - Elliott born at 129 x

11/02/2011 - Leo born at 11:37 x

No one is jumping on you though hun.

Its just some of the girls had said stuff, which other people took the wrong way. It was then clarified what was meant and you still were taking a bit personal.

Thing is, if you dont feel you like the subject of a thread, why not just leave it?

 

[netty]

yep, and its nice to be able to buy things for your kids that are totally unnecessary but just because u want to?

i cant imagine not being able to treat my lo on occasions. Im not saying thats the be all and end all but its enjoying for me xx

My oh goes mad at me for the number of baby gros and outfits I buy, he rightly says that half of them won't be worn but it's part of the fun isn't it xx

of course!!

theres no greater satisfaction than ripping the tags off a new outfit for a new baby and them just being all 'new' lol yes im sad! but its all part of the fun! xx

Well I'm sad too then, I like sniffing them x

i smell baby clothes in the shops i cant wait to have a fricking baby!!!! they are all sooooo soft and awwwwwww!!!

someone lend me their baby for a bit!

 

[cosmicgirl]

yep, and its nice to be able to buy things for your kids that are totally unnecessary but just because u want to?

i cant imagine not being able to treat my lo on occasions. Im not saying thats the be all and end all but its enjoying for me xx

My oh goes mad at me for the number of baby gros and outfits I buy, he rightly says that half of them won't be worn but it's part of the fun isn't it xx

of course!!

theres no greater satisfaction than ripping the tags off a new outfit for a new baby and them just being all 'new' lol yes im sad! but its all part of the fun! xx

Well I'm sad too then, I like sniffing them x

i smell baby clothes in the shops i cant wait to have a fricking baby!!!! they are all sooooo soft and awwwwwww!!!

someone lend me their baby for a bit!

Anyone rub them against their cheek?
Come on, own up x

 

[Humesy]

yep, and its nice to be able to buy things for your kids that are totally unnecessary but just because u want to?

i cant imagine not being able to treat my lo on occasions. Im not saying thats the be all and end all but its enjoying for me xx

My oh goes mad at me for the number of baby gros and outfits I buy, he rightly says that half of them won't be worn but it's part of the fun isn't it xx

of course!!

theres no greater satisfaction than ripping the tags off a new outfit for a new baby and them just being all 'new' lol yes im sad! but its all part of the fun! xx

Well I'm sad too then, I like sniffing them x

i smell baby clothes in the shops i cant wait to have a fricking baby!!!! they are all sooooo soft and awwwwwww!!!

someone lend me their baby for a bit!

you can have a lend of mine! hes not quite a new being any more but hes up for grabs if u want him

hes a troublesome one but oh so cute!

thats y im trying for a girl im CONVINCING myself girls r pretty little dolls who dont move, get dirty or answer back

xxx

 

[Me, My Girls & I]

You can have ella, I'll pay you! Is it wrong that this threads making me really broody?

 

[cosmicgirl]

You know what i have only put across my opinion to be jumped on by the regulars i find this unfair.

20/06/2012 - Elliott born at 129 x

11/02/2011 - Leo born at 11:37 x

No, you are being debated with because you are reducing this interesting debate to your (subjective) opinion that it is "stupid".

Not everyone on this thread is a regular, or is a regular in a different part of the forum from other people involved in this debate. The key characteristic that is binding them together is respectful, healthy debate. Sadly, your posts have been neither so far.

I invite you to give us your opinion on the topic at hand:

"Can you actually afford to have a baby?"

So, can you? Is it something that is financially viable for you right now, are you doing well, or are you struggling? Do you think things would have been better had you waited? If so, why? Do you think in your circumstances it is fair?

I look forward to your response.

x

 

[Froslass]

yep, and its nice to be able to buy things for your kids that are totally unnecessary but just because u want to?

i cant imagine not being able to treat my lo on occasions. Im not saying thats the be all and end all but its enjoying for me xx

My oh goes mad at me for the number of baby gros and outfits I buy, he rightly says that half of them won't be worn but it's part of the fun isn't it xx

of course!!

theres no greater satisfaction than ripping the tags off a new outfit for a new baby and them just being all 'new' lol yes im sad! but its all part of the fun! xx

Well I'm sad too then, I like sniffing them x

i smell baby clothes in the shops i cant wait to have a fricking baby!!!! they are all sooooo soft and awwwwwww!!!

someone lend me their baby for a bit!

geeze lynette you can borrow mine...

Shes crawling rings around me these days.. lol

 

[Humesy]

haha yes this thread should put us all off because theyre so expensive! but they ARE soooo worth every penny of my hard earned cash! damn i need another one! my bodys taking to long!

and yesi rub them ESP velour! x

 

[LikeJohnnYoko]

you can have a lend of mine! hes not quite a new being any more but hes up for grabs if u want him

hes a troublesome one but oh so cute!

thats y im trying for a girl im CONVINCING myself girls r pretty little dolls who dont move, get dirty or answer back

xxx

My mother would quickly tell you otherwise!

 

[Me, My Girls & I]

Humsey, I invite you yo spend 10 mins with ella! It's quite apt that autocorrecy keeps changing her name to fella!

 

[MrsCow]

Babyem, I completely agree about the fact that there are many many people who would love more children but understand that realistically they cant afford it. It is unfair, espaecially as they are obviously taking responsibility for there own children and not expecting others to pay for them or they would just go ahead and have them wouldnt they? Imagine if we all thought like that?
What a mess we would be in x

 

[cosmicgirl]

haha yes this thread should put us all off because theyre so expensive! but they ARE soooo worth every penny of my hard earned cash! damn i need another one! my bodys taking to long!

and yesi rub them ESP velour! x

I read somewhere how much one child costs over a lifetime, I can't remember the figure but insure it was something like £80k???? x

 

[Humesy]

Humsey, I invite you yo spend 10 mins with ella! It's quite apt that autocorrecy keeps changing her name to fella!

It would be my pleasure! Im sure she is JUST what i was imagining

xx

 

[Froslass]

Babyem, I completely agree about the fact that there are many many people who would love more children but understand that realistically they cant afford it. It is unfair, espaecially as they are obviously taking responsibility for there own children and not expecting others to pay for them or they would just go ahead and have them wouldnt they? Imagine if we all thought like that?
What a mess we would be in x

I agree it is a real shame

Just goes to show that the real issue here in the minimum wage and system!