can you actually afford to have a baby?

[Froslass]

To be fair the original post mentioned the girl wanting IVF while on benefits. But her partner is doing an apprentiship so is obviously wants to get work so how is that any different from what you are moaning about yes she wants another baby but her partner isn't spongeing like you say. So yeah the ones who have limited few babies are made to feel like they shouldn't have had them and they don't deserve to live.

Frankly this thread in its self is Stupid and it will only go round in circles.

20/06/2012 - Elliott born at 129 x

11/02/2011 - Leo born at 11:37 x

Yes, however, do you know what the standard wage for an apprenticeship is?
From the DirectGov information on it (and heaven knows because I was an apprentice a few years back myself) It is "£2.60 - the apprentice rate, for apprentices under 19 or 19 or over and in the first year of their apprenticeship."

Do you think that it is fiscally responsible of a couple who are on benefits and a £2.60 rate of earnings to be allowed IVF? To be actively TTC?

It's not even enough for a lone adult to survive on, let alone a couple and a child.

Willing to work though the person may be, why then can't they wait until he is gainfully employed and earning at least Adult Minimum wage? I would not for a second support someone choosing to bring a baby into that by an expensive procedure for the NHS, when they will struggle to provide for themselves, let alone a baby.

This doesn't mean I don't support them ever TTC - you may notice I am not a parent yet. I have PCOS and were I to need IVF, I would not do so in that situation. I am going to be WTT for at least 2 more years myself until my life is in a better place before having children, so I know what it is to have to wait for something I want so badly.

I am aware that there are members on this forum who have partners doing apprenticeships, and I'm sure they can tell you how hard it is to get by and how frugal and sacrificing they have to be with it.

Completely agree.

We would love another baby, but have decided to wait until OH has graduated from uni (next year) and is in a stable job.

We have a decent income (£20000a year) from OH's 2 jobs and student bursary and i still worry about money!
We are lucky to have savings and are currently looking for the right place to buy.

Having been through having a baby unexpectedly, trying to get into a better position in 9 months, I cant understand why people would actually plan to have a child when they know once the apprenticeship is finished its going to be a lot less stressful money-wise.

 

[cosmicgirl]

Yes i agree on that wages are low but its their choice and i can add my comment ladies even if i think its stupid ok not like i quote all of yours

20/06/2012 - Elliott born at 129 x

11/02/2011 - Leo born at 11:37 x

Yes it is their choice but that is the topic of the whole thread, can you afford a baby???
I think you are missing the point of the discussion???

 

[Froslass]

Just to throw this out there a wee bit but should you all be more concerned that your tax money goes on these nice privileged prison now days rather than benefits for people who need them x

Blimey! I might be missing the point here, but what has this got to do with original topic? What is this, ""wind up the tax payers week" ?!!

Yes it's a wee bit off topic but It bugs me people moaning about us having bubbas on benefits (yes my & partners are due to medical & ppl have said that doesby include us) but feel included & its a fair bit more concerning they get nice prisons & we get told we dont deserves babies

noooo!

No one has said anything like that. People were referring to claimants who pretend to be sick, disabled,not people who genuinely are disabled/unable to work for medical reasons.

Can I just add that was written doesn't but my phone had other ideas

Ah ok

 

[cosmicgirl]

To be fair the original post mentioned the girl wanting IVF while on benefits. But her partner is doing an apprentiship so is obviously wants to get work so how is that any different from what you are moaning about yes she wants another baby but her partner isn't spongeing like you say. So yeah the ones who have limited few babies are made to feel like they shouldn't have had them and they don't deserve to live.

Frankly this thread in its self is Stupid and it will only go round in circles.

20/06/2012 - Elliott born at 129 x

11/02/2011 - Leo born at 11:37 x

Yes, however, do you know what the standard wage for an apprenticeship is?
From the DirectGov information on it (and heaven knows because I was an apprentice a few years back myself) It is "£2.60 - the apprentice rate, for apprentices under 19 or 19 or over and in the first year of their apprenticeship."

Do you think that it is fiscally responsible of a couple who are on benefits and a £2.60 rate of earnings to be allowed IVF? To be actively TTC?

It's not even enough for a lone adult to survive on, let alone a couple and a child.

Willing to work though the person may be, why then can't they wait until he is gainfully employed and earning at least Adult Minimum wage? I would not for a second support someone choosing to bring a baby into that by an expensive procedure for the NHS, when they will struggle to provide for themselves, let alone a baby.

This doesn't mean I don't support them ever TTC - you may notice I am not a parent yet. I have PCOS and were I to need IVF, I would not do so in that situation. I am going to be WTT for at least 2 more years myself until my life is in a better place before having children, so I know what it is to have to wait for something I want so badly.

I am aware that there are members on this forum who have partners doing apprenticeships, and I'm sure they can tell you how hard it is to get by and how frugal and sacrificing they have to be with it.

Completely agree.

We would love another baby, but have decided to wait until OH has graduated from uni (next year) and is in a stable job.

We have a decent income (£20000a year) from OH's 2 jobs and student bursary and i still worry about money!
We are lucky to have savings and are currently looking for the right place to buy.

Having been through having a baby unexpectedly, trying to get into a better position in 9 months, I cant understand why people would actually plan to have a child when they know once the apprenticeship is finished its going to be a lot less stressful money-wise.

I said that earlier on in this thread, if nothing else, the stress of struggling financially would ruin ttc and babyhood for me xx

 

[netty]

Yes i agree on that wages are low but its their choice and i can add my comment ladies even if i think its stupid ok not like i quote all of yours

20/06/2012 - Elliott born at 129 x

11/02/2011 - Leo born at 11:37 x

well no love you cant really seeing as if you think peoples views and this thread is stupid you are offending me and all the other ladies here

if you just want to post to say something derogatory then you are breaking forum rules and causing unnecessary friction

i suggest you find a better, less offensive way to join the debate

like the rest of us have done

 

[babyem]

i love how people are just throwing in quotes people havent said?

i also ignore threads that annoy me, debates are meant to have a difference in opinion not wild accusations that people dont deserve to live?

come on!

I wish this was taken on board more by people! Instead of people being accused of bullying and enjoying bullying other members as they disagree with others opinions when asked (I am referring to past threads). Why can't everyone share their opinions without being jumped on or accused of something?!
It's healthy to share conflicting opinions within reason! It teaches you new things and keeps your eyes open to reality!! x

To be fair the original post mentioned the girl wanting IVF while on benefits. But her partner is doing an apprentiship so is obviously wants to get work so how is that any different from what you are moaning about yes she wants another baby but her partner isn't spongeing like you say. So yeah the ones who have limited few babies are made to feel like they shouldn't have had them and they don't deserve to live.

Frankly this thread in its self is Stupid and it will only go round in circles.

20/06/2012 - Elliott born at 129 x

11/02/2011 - Leo born at 11:37 x

Yes, however, do you know what the standard wage for an apprenticeship is?
From the DirectGov information on it (and heaven knows because I was an apprentice a few years back myself) It is "£2.60 - the apprentice rate, for apprentices under 19 or 19 or over and in the first year of their apprenticeship."

Do you think that it is fiscally responsible of a couple who are on benefits and a £2.60 rate of earnings to be allowed IVF? To be actively TTC?

It's not even enough for a lone adult to survive on, let alone a couple and a child.

Willing to work though the person may be, why then can't they wait until he is gainfully employed and earning at least Adult Minimum wage? I would not for a second support someone choosing to bring a baby into that by an expensive procedure for the NHS, when they will struggle to provide for themselves, let alone a baby.

This doesn't mean I don't support them ever TTC - you may notice I am not a parent yet. I have PCOS and were I to need IVF, I would not do so in that situation. I am going to be WTT for at least 2 more years myself until my life is in a better place before having children, so I know what it is to have to wait for something I want so badly.

I am aware that there are members on this forum who have partners doing apprenticeships, and I'm sure they can tell you how hard it is to get by and how frugal and sacrificing they have to be with it.

LJY, I think you are a marvelous woman. I wish there were more people like you in society, who actually really think about the responsibilities of having a child and what needs to be done before making such a life changing and life creating decision, which IMO is made far too readily nowadays. I take my hat off to you, I really do. You are very much right, if something means so much to you, then you would wait 2 years or more for it.

One thing that I saw a few months back was a couple who already had 2 children, but wanted more. Because they couldn't afford another child they decided to stop at 2 and would not have another in the future. They both worked long and hard hours yet felt they were being forced to cut their family off iykwim? It saddens me that people who are willing to work all the hours god sends to try and afford children just can't, so have to cut their dreams short x

 

[netty]

cos i totally agree, if i chose to bring a baby into the world knowing full well i would be coping on the breadline every day it would just be awful, it would ruin it for me then consequently for my child

 

[Froslass]

To be fair the original post mentioned the girl wanting IVF while on benefits. But her partner is doing an apprentiship so is obviously wants to get work so how is that any different from what you are moaning about yes she wants another baby but her partner isn't spongeing like you say. So yeah the ones who have limited few babies are made to feel like they shouldn't have had them and they don't deserve to live.

Frankly this thread in its self is Stupid and it will only go round in circles.

20/06/2012 - Elliott born at 129 x

11/02/2011 - Leo born at 11:37 x

Yes, however, do you know what the standard wage for an apprenticeship is?
From the DirectGov information on it (and heaven knows because I was an apprentice a few years back myself) It is "£2.60 - the apprentice rate, for apprentices under 19 or 19 or over and in the first year of their apprenticeship."

Do you think that it is fiscally responsible of a couple who are on benefits and a £2.60 rate of earnings to be allowed IVF? To be actively TTC?

It's not even enough for a lone adult to survive on, let alone a couple and a child.

Willing to work though the person may be, why then can't they wait until he is gainfully employed and earning at least Adult Minimum wage? I would not for a second support someone choosing to bring a baby into that by an expensive procedure for the NHS, when they will struggle to provide for themselves, let alone a baby.

This doesn't mean I don't support them ever TTC - you may notice I am not a parent yet. I have PCOS and were I to need IVF, I would not do so in that situation. I am going to be WTT for at least 2 more years myself until my life is in a better place before having children, so I know what it is to have to wait for something I want so badly.

I am aware that there are members on this forum who have partners doing apprenticeships, and I'm sure they can tell you how hard it is to get by and how frugal and sacrificing they have to be with it.

Completely agree.

We would love another baby, but have decided to wait until OH has graduated from uni (next year) and is in a stable job.

We have a decent income (£20000a year) from OH's 2 jobs and student bursary and i still worry about money!
We are lucky to have savings and are currently looking for the right place to buy.

Having been through having a baby unexpectedly, trying to get into a better position in 9 months, I cant understand why people would actually plan to have a child when they know once the apprenticeship is finished its going to be a lot less stressful money-wise.

I said that earlier on in this thread, if nothing else, the stress of struggling financially would ruin ttc and babyhood for me xx

It would for me too!

I cant wait to be in a good position, to actually look forward to TTC. I want to look forward to getting a BFP and not dread a second line coming up! x

 

[Humesy]

Yes i agree on that wages are low but its their choice and i can add my comment ladies even if i think its stupid ok not like i quote all of yours

20/06/2012 - Elliott born at 129 x

11/02/2011 - Leo born at 11:37 x

well no love you cant really seeing as if you think peoples views and this thread is stupid you are offending me and all the other ladies here

if you just want to post to say something derogatory then you are breaking forum rules and causing unnecessary friction

i suggest you find a better, less offensive way to join the debate

like the rest of us have done

Hmm r u a 'hidden mod' ? lol

well said x

 

[Humesy]

and yeah i agree, bringing a baby into the world should be an exciting new chapter for any family? so y ruin it with unnecessary stress? xx

 

[cosmicgirl]

To be fair the original post mentioned the girl wanting IVF while on benefits. But her partner is doing an apprentiship so is obviously wants to get work so how is that any different from what you are moaning about yes she wants another baby but her partner isn't spongeing like you say. So yeah the ones who have limited few babies are made to feel like they shouldn't have had them and they don't deserve to live.

Frankly this thread in its self is Stupid and it will only go round in circles.

20/06/2012 - Elliott born at 129 x

11/02/2011 - Leo born at 11:37 x

Yes, however, do you know what the standard wage for an apprenticeship is?
From the DirectGov information on it (and heaven knows because I was an apprentice a few years back myself) It is "£2.60 - the apprentice rate, for apprentices under 19 or 19 or over and in the first year of their apprenticeship."

Do you think that it is fiscally responsible of a couple who are on benefits and a £2.60 rate of earnings to be allowed IVF? To be actively TTC?

It's not even enough for a lone adult to survive on, let alone a couple and a child.

Willing to work though the person may be, why then can't they wait until he is gainfully employed and earning at least Adult Minimum wage? I would not for a second support someone choosing to bring a baby into that by an expensive procedure for the NHS, when they will struggle to provide for themselves, let alone a baby.

This doesn't mean I don't support them ever TTC - you may notice I am not a parent yet. I have PCOS and were I to need IVF, I would not do so in that situation. I am going to be WTT for at least 2 more years myself until my life is in a better place before having children, so I know what it is to have to wait for something I want so badly.

I am aware that there are members on this forum who have partners doing apprenticeships, and I'm sure they can tell you how hard it is to get by and how frugal and sacrificing they have to be with it.

Completely agree.

We would love another baby, but have decided to wait until OH has graduated from uni (next year) and is in a stable job.

We have a decent income (£20000a year) from OH's 2 jobs and student bursary and i still worry about money!
We are lucky to have savings and are currently looking for the right place to buy.

Having been through having a baby unexpectedly, trying to get into a better position in 9 months, I cant understand why people would actually plan to have a child when they know once the apprenticeship is finished its going to be a lot less stressful money-wise.

I said that earlier on in this thread, if nothing else, the stress of struggling financially would ruin ttc and babyhood for me xx

It would for me too!

I cant wait to be in a good position, to actually look forward to TTC. I want to look forward to getting a BFP and not dread a second line coming up! x

I can imagine nothing worse, its stressful enough isn't it?
And it's the nice things like buying the stuff you know you don't need but it's nice to indulge xx

 

[Froslass]

Yes i agree on that wages are low but its their choice and i can add my comment ladies even if i think its stupid ok not like i quote all of yours

20/06/2012 - Elliott born at 129 x

11/02/2011 - Leo born at 11:37 x

If you think its stupid don't comment. If you disagree, agree to disagree, thats the point of a debate x

 

[misscrazycooki]

You know what i have only put across my opinion to be jumped on by the regulars i find this unfair.

20/06/2012 - Elliott born at 129 x

11/02/2011 - Leo born at 11:37 x

 

[Humesy]

yep, and its nice to be able to buy things for your kids that are totally unnecessary but just because u want to?

i cant imagine not being able to treat my lo on occasions. Im not saying thats the be all and end all but its enjoying for me xx

 

[misscrazycooki]

I did say even if i never said i did your not reading anything properly

20/06/2012 - Elliott born at 129 x

11/02/2011 - Leo born at 11:37 x

 

[babyem]

I don't understand why people can't accept that EVERYONES opinion is valued, just because people don't agree doesn't mean that one person is being 'jumped on' or 'bullied'. It annoys me that debates end up leading to people having the finger pointed at them and told they are in the wrong. For what? Answering a question that has been asked of them?? x

 

[Froslass]

To be fair the original post mentioned the girl wanting IVF while on benefits. But her partner is doing an apprentiship so is obviously wants to get work so how is that any different from what you are moaning about yes she wants another baby but her partner isn't spongeing like you say. So yeah the ones who have limited few babies are made to feel like they shouldn't have had them and they don't deserve to live.

Frankly this thread in its self is Stupid and it will only go round in circles.

20/06/2012 - Elliott born at 129 x

11/02/2011 - Leo born at 11:37 x

Yes, however, do you know what the standard wage for an apprenticeship is?
From the DirectGov information on it (and heaven knows because I was an apprentice a few years back myself) It is "£2.60 - the apprentice rate, for apprentices under 19 or 19 or over and in the first year of their apprenticeship."

Do you think that it is fiscally responsible of a couple who are on benefits and a £2.60 rate of earnings to be allowed IVF? To be actively TTC?

It's not even enough for a lone adult to survive on, let alone a couple and a child.

Willing to work though the person may be, why then can't they wait until he is gainfully employed and earning at least Adult Minimum wage? I would not for a second support someone choosing to bring a baby into that by an expensive procedure for the NHS, when they will struggle to provide for themselves, let alone a baby.

This doesn't mean I don't support them ever TTC - you may notice I am not a parent yet. I have PCOS and were I to need IVF, I would not do so in that situation. I am going to be WTT for at least 2 more years myself until my life is in a better place before having children, so I know what it is to have to wait for something I want so badly.

I am aware that there are members on this forum who have partners doing apprenticeships, and I'm sure they can tell you how hard it is to get by and how frugal and sacrificing they have to be with it.

Completely agree.

We would love another baby, but have decided to wait until OH has graduated from uni (next year) and is in a stable job.

We have a decent income (£20000a year) from OH's 2 jobs and student bursary and i still worry about money!
We are lucky to have savings and are currently looking for the right place to buy.

Having been through having a baby unexpectedly, trying to get into a better position in 9 months, I cant understand why people would actually plan to have a child when they know once the apprenticeship is finished its going to be a lot less stressful money-wise.

I said that earlier on in this thread, if nothing else, the stress of struggling financially would ruin ttc and babyhood for me xx

It would for me too!

I cant wait to be in a good position, to actually look forward to TTC. I want to look forward to getting a BFP and not dread a second line coming up! x

I can imagine nothing worse, its stressful enough isn't it?
And it's the nice things like buying the stuff you know you don't need but it's nice to indulge xx

It is!

LO was a wee surprise, OH and I were still living with parents. Luckily between us we had enough savings to buy everything we needed, and probably indulge in a few things we didnt.

BUT - the whole moving in togther, unexpected pregnancy, money worries really made what should be an enjoyable exciting time stressful! Our saving went on a years worth of rent, council tax, baby stuff! We cancelled our holidays etc..

Cant wait to not have to think about worrying next time, everything will be set up

 

[cosmicgirl]

yep, and its nice to be able to buy things for your kids that are totally unnecessary but just because u want to?

i cant imagine not being able to treat my lo on occasions. Im not saying thats the be all and end all but its enjoying for me xx

My oh goes mad at me for the number of baby gros and outfits I buy, he rightly says that half of them won't be worn but it's part of the fun isn't it xx

 

[Humesy]

You know what i have only put across my opinion to be jumped on by the regulars i find this unfair.

20/06/2012 - Elliott born at 129 x

11/02/2011 - Leo born at 11:37 x

I'm not a regular and I can see that your taking things the wrong way EVEN after the girls have reassured you what they meant? It's like your trying to cause an argument, your opinion is 100% valid but you are taking things the wrong way so people will defend what they have said x

 

[Me, My Girls & I]

My minds boggled! Everyone is welcome to share an opinion, would just .br nice if it could be done in a courteous, adult manner rather than just "its stupid"