*** November 2014 Mum's ***

[Goat]

NJP sorry the blowing trick didn't work. How is Frankie with the antibiotics now?

Mellie, after my eldest was born I had a debrief. You can have it at any time, my gp contacted the consultant who then arranged it. I really recommend it, made things a lot clearer for me and helped with the second pregnancy.

Apple we're going through the regression, she fed every 90 mins last night. Feel like a zombie today. Luckily both are napping now and I'm catching up on Towie and lounging on the sofa.x

 

[mellie_88]

They never even told me what was going on. I remember asking if I can feed him and was told no he needs to be weighed and dressed first. But that was obviously just an excuse so they could sort me out. I lost a fair amount of blood so it was either that or placenta I assume. I'd have just rather been told either what was going on or told afterwards what happened. I didn't even know I'd lost so much blood until the midwife mentioned it when she first visited us at home.

Jake quite likes his lamaze toys too. He also really likes these links we got, theyre by bright start. They were only about £4 but they're so useful. He grabs them and chews them at the moment to help his teeth.

Thanks goat might try contacting my gp then and see if I can get one out if curiosity more than anything!

Jake took until 11.30 to get to sleep last night (we went upstairs at 7!) He was then awake about every hour or so and had to let him sleep in our bed. If I tried to slide him across he'd wake up.

 

[Applecrumble]

I actually dont feel too bad in the day, its lonely helpless dispair feeling i cant handle during the night..if i knew it was for x amount of days i could handle it...but the wondering if this is for the next four days, months or years that gets me.

Tonight we are trying seriously loud white noise (recommended by a sleep trainer...and if that fails i will introduce baby rice maybe next weekend) interestingly my friend was to.d by her gp that the latest info says weaning from 4months..and a repot called EAT...i think that gp is abit rogue as thinking the nhs website would be updated too if that was the case.

Njp i have a load of frozen milk in fridge that will probably never get used now! I was thinkinfg this morning how well you have done bf..especially as in the begining the odds were against you.

Good luck with the night ladies.

 

[mellie_88]

If any gps say 4 months then technically they should be reported, they're really not meant to and I highly, highly doubt the recommendations will change any time soon. Plus food isn't meant to help them sleep longer. Same as formula doesnt make them sleep longer. Its one of those misconceptions because for some babies it does work.

I'm still trying to add to my freezer stash for when I (hopefully) move as then I can give Jake to my mom. Although at this rate I reckon he'll be on solids by the time we move.

Jake went down ok ish tonight surprisingly. Im sure he'll still be up about 8 times in the night though. I've been seeing every hour recently. Roll on tomorrow night as then OH has the weekend off so I can kick him and make him get up for some of them! Haha

 

[nicejuicypear]

Apple, have you spoken to your HV? It sounds like you could do with someone to talk to.

Had a bit of a bad day myself. The GP just emphasised that I have to find a way to get the antibiotics down her. I 'just have to do it' apparently. She was nice with it but how to do you force a 4 month old to swallow? Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. It made me feel quite crap and I had a bit of a cry in the surgery. It is hard to do something that makes your baby scream so much. Antibiotics 4 times a day and putting the boots on a few times a day, all makes her scream in pain and upsets me.

Then at Alder Hey it turns out she'd had the wrong size boots put on last week, so that was corrected, but it has annoyed me that I've had to make yet another trip up there. Then the woman said she didn't like the padding the bloke had put on last week to take the pressure off the infected heel. I said it was important not to let the blister turn into a pressure sore and she said that she didn't think that would happen, even though the whole point of the boots is to fasten them as tightly as physically possible, forcing the heel right into the corner with pressure.

And I still think her good foot is looking twisted in the boot, it's twisting out at a weird angle high up in the ankle and I'm worried it will be permanent. The physio said it wouldn't be, but if the boot isn't making a permanent change when twisting the good foot out, how is the other boot (exactly the same) making a permanent change twisting the bad foot into position? My wife agreed that this reasoning is illogical but I don't know what to do about it.

It has been a hard week. But when she's not crying she gives the most lovely cuddles which do help.

Talking of toys, Frankie has a Lamaze giraffe that she's not at all bothered about. i think the Lamaze stuff looks great but clearly she has other ideas. My grandma got her an activity sheep teddy from the ELC which she is also completely disinterested in! I think she's going to be like me, I was a watcher apparently. Would sit and nosey at everything going on but not be very active. I'm still like that now.

Hope you're all getting a decent sleep. Frankie is well away, but for some reason I'm not tonight. I think I will drift off just in time for her to wake up.

 

[mellie_88]

Jakes only started liking his lamaze toys in the past week so give her time, she might suddenly start too. He's a watcher though, he's so nosey always wants to know what's going on.

Poor Frankie, the reasoning behind the foot does seem strange, and all the doctors don't seem that helpful. You think they'd understand how much of a big deal it is for parents and be a bit more supportive

 

[Applecrumble]

My sisters baby is a watcher..Imogen loves toys, although her favourite thingis lying down and standing up at the moment.

Njp..poor frankie i do feel for her, it must be so tough and does sound like your being messed around. Could your wife or someone else give antibotics to her, may be easier if you were not there so to speak or just a by stander.

I am awake because my boobs are leaking imogen is asleep and has been allnight... I have had a breakthrough night and cant sleep because im so chuffed. Will share tips in morning, need to get up though and express. Last two nights i had been feeding every hour so no wonder boobs are bursting.

 

[nicejuicypear]

The GP is pretty good, she said I can go in for a chat if I want to, but she couldn't offer any alternatives for the antibiotics. I have to give her most of them because my wife is either working or sleeping at the minute and there's 4 doses a day to be given. Yesterday's ones went okay, so hopefully the tip the GP gave me will help. When I say okay, it all stayed in - she still screamed but I just have to steel myself for that.

Apple I woke up like that the other morning! Milk everywhere. I fed her off the worst side and then a couple of hours later put her on the other one even though she wasn't rooting, I just wanted some relief!

Frankie mostly likes toys being held in front of her face. She can grab them but she doesn't seem to realise she can hold them up to look at them. She can hold them up to stuff bits of them in her mouth, yet doesn't do it with teething rings. She seems quite happy chewing a bit of bib most of the time.

Anyoen got any nice plans for Easter? My wife is working night shifts from last night until Sunday so will be sleeping until Monday. Bank holiday pay is good though. She has suggested we have a couple of nights away soon on a cheap break so going to google for that today.

 

[Staceylou27]

Apple glad you finally had a good night! Not so good about the leaks hehe!

Njp hopefully they will get frankie sorted soon with the boots! There annoying me just reading what your writing and I'm not the one back and forth to the hospital!

Ruby was up coughing a lot last night but she seemed to fall straight back asleep only waking every 3 hours for a feed.
We took her to a soft play gym yday for the first time and swimming today! She loved swimming and slept for over an hour after it bless her!

Ruby loves any toys at all she puts everything in her mouth! If she's holding one thing and you show her something else she will want that too.
She has a lot of Lamaze toys I really like them. Ruby also enjoys musical/noisy toys

 

[Kaa286]

Sorry been MIA for a while had some terrible nights and been quite poorly too still trying to shake it off but the headaches and hangover feeling wont shift :-/

Sorry to hear ur all having bad times at the min. Definitely sounds like 4 m regression though. And stacey weaning can cause it too no rest for the wicked huh?!

Yes i had the birth after thoughts. Its not too late mellie ring hv and ask for them to refer u. At the end of the day it could affect u emotionally / mentally infuture if get pregnant again. Thats what worried me too was how id be about future labour. They just sit and go through ur notes with u.
I didnt get skin to skin or feed faith for about an hour as was being stitched and they were getting cleaned up and me sorted out. Feel a bit miffed about it but to be honest i was in shock so in no state to do much and think mw knew that so wanted to let me recover.
Definitely recommend it though its so worth it!!!

Njp ive been looking. I only want part time and there is just nothing so im really stressing I'll end up having to apply for full time which i do not want!!
I dont want to work at all but we need the money nige wage alone means we dont qualify for any help (this should also mean we have plenty of money but alas his debts are screwing me up!!!) haha.
Hope u all have lovely easter plans. Family time for us. Not with nige though. He has football all weekend. Wtf is wrong with these idiots that they arrange stuff like this for easter sunday. Spend time with ur families u selfish b@*!%#÷s

 

[nicejuicypear]

Kaa, from Monday the new tax credits calculator should be online, put in his wage + what you'll get from April onwards with the mat pay, you might find you get something. I know the threshold is low for only one child but it's worth checking out just in case. The problem I find with part time is that it's a lot of half days which bumps the childcare costs up.

Went to sling library. I am so stupid, I unclipped her foot bar for comfort in the car seat then left it at home so couldn't try slings with it on! I've hired one though, see how I get on. It's dead comfy!

Did Ruby do much at soft play, Stacey? I've never been to one so don't know if there's much for babies.

 

[nicejuicypear]

I have made the executive decision to alter the settings on Frankie's bar myself, measured her more accurately than the hospital did and her ankle is now in a much better position and she didn't scream when I put the bar back on. It was short by quite a bit, must have been so painful.

 

[Kaa286]

I dont get how to work it out though. As i only have 3 more payments left to get plus think cut off is 28000 and he earns more on his own. Will give it a try anyway though thank you! Fingers crossed ha. I only want to work like thursday friday coz my mumcan have her fridays as she doesnt work them and then it only 1 day a week in nursery.

Oh wow thats great u managed to sort but how incompetent of them at hospital to get it so wrong i hope you're going to complain!!

 

[nicejuicypear]

There's an online calculator, but I think you're right about the cut off for one child. Different for us having 4, which why I might be just as well off not working. I won't do it long term, just the next academic year.

Check whether nige can get childcare vouchers through his work. I don't know the full details but you buy say, £200 worth of childcare but they only take £100 out of his wages, so it saves you. Is he getting any better with the payday loans?

I hadn't thought about complaining. I don't want to make things awkward though, we've got to keep going until she's 5. I'll keep a record of it though in case more happens.

I had a total baby brain moment before! I went to asda & used the self service tills. Walked out of the shop , put baby back in car, started putting the wheels in, the realised I'd not picked my shopping bags up! I had to go back in and ask for it!

 

[Kaa286]

Will have a look anyway but highly doubt we will get anything. oh never heard of that will certainly look into it thank you. Although at the minute id ratger run away and live with faith ina cave than go bk to work and put her in childcare hahaha.

I know what u mean but at same time if an issue they need to address it.
Just hope this solves it. How have u got on with her antibiotics? Is Frankie Any better at taking them from u now?

Oh no hahaha!!! Id be annoyed and embarrassed u poor thing ha

 

[mellie_88]

I sent my tax credits form.off this week. We earn too much combined but apparently I should be able to get a bit because of maternity pay. Will then reassess the situation when I get a job. Shane only earns about 17k I think so we should definitely be entitled to it when I go part time too. Hope so anyway!

Will have to contact hv then to see if I can arrange a debrief I don't think it will effect me for future pregnancies its mainly because I'm nosey and just want to know. They should tell you anyway i think, its a pretty big moment in every mothers life!

We went to an easter fete at the hall gardens by my moms today. OH has never been there before he said it was like stepping back in time they had morris dancers and everything. Then we went to see my grandparents then later on went to see my brother.
Tomorrow we're having dinner at OHs moms and Monfay we're having breakfast with his dad. So we really are seeing all the families. Makes me so grateful that Shane doesn't like football. It's definitely a massive plus point about him! Haha

 

[Staceylou27]

I agree mellie they should tell you after anyway and I don't agree they Tahoe all your notes from you, I photocopied one page that told me how long labour was and who were my midwifes etc.

Glad you got a sling njp! We have a morph from mammas and pappas it's more an outdoors one and wouldn't suit for around the house but we love it so easy to put on when your alone.

The particular soft play we went to wasn't the best it had an ok baby area but the toys looked a little worn. They had an under 2s area with a ball pool with a slide in which daddy sent her down (holding onto her tho!) and like a padded area with other toys in. There were bouncers and jumperoos it did say there was a sensory room but there wasn't :/ it was free to get in tho for under 6months so it was ok to get out for a bit and not spend any thing
I like to go to diff places so she gets to see diff things and play with different toys it's all a new experience for her.

We pushed our luck a little with Ruby's bedtime tonight she usually has a bath around 7 so were always home for then but we stayed out til 7.45 and she had a bath at 8. She did get whingy so that's why we left, we were at in laws house. She usually goes to sleep around 8 after having a bath at 7ish bottle then a story. Even though we changed the times and she got grumpy after the bath she was asleep not long after 8 and she hasn't woken yet like she usually does for resettling. Fingers crossed for a good night

 

[Applecrumble]

Hi girls..

Kaa sorry you have been ill, its hard work when you want to stay in bef sick that was me the begining of yhe week.

Mother knows best njp...so changing the bar of her boots is good call. No one but you will take as much care.

So this has been a week of highs and low..highs we have nailed the bedtime routine and i can get Imogen asleep before 7:30, Johns aways tonight on a stag do and i have a girlfriend and her two children staying and despite the chaos Imogen went to sleep by 7:30 and even self settled. So proud. Massive leap for us ... Touch wood the nights have got better..but dont want to tempt fait.

Spent the day with the girlfriends and wifes of boys who went on stag do nice..nice walk in dartmouth and tea and cakes.
Happy easter and chocolate eating.

 

[Applecrumble]

Hi girls..

Kaa sorry you have been ill, its hard work when you want to stay in bef sick that was me the begining of yhe week.

Mother knows best njp...so changing the bar of her boots is good call. No one but you will take as much care.

So this has been a week of highs and low..highs we have nailed the bedtime routine and i can get Imogen asleep before 7:30, Johns aways tonight on a stag do and i have a girlfriend and her two children staying and despite the chaos Imogen went to sleep by 7:30 and even self settled. So proud. Massive leap for us ... Touch wood the nights have got better..but dont want to tempt fait.

Spent the day with the girlfriends and wifes of boys who went on stag do nice..nice walk in dartmouth and tea and cakes.
Happy easter and chocolate eating.

 

[nicejuicypear]

Frankie still goes to sleep dead late. I've tried making it earlier and she's having none of it. I think I'm just going to have to bring it forward by very small amounts at a time. But to be honest I can be rather disorganised so sometimes I'm late going to bed with her. Evenings are variable here, when my wife is on night shift we often go out to take her to work, dinner isn't at a fixed time. I might need to tighten up my schedule to get Frankie to sleep earlier.

She's not sure about the sling. It might be pushing her legs too far open. I can go back and try others though, so I might try a wrap style one next. I'm using the Connecta atm.

Talking of tax credits, we've used them on and off for years and have learned some things the hard way so I thought I'd pass on some tips: If you want to use an estimated income, always estimate higher than you think it will be, otherwise they'll claim money back at the end of the tax year. Always inform them of changes asap and make sure you get the paperwork with the amendment on. Keep all paperwork from them, forever (a friend got audited & they wanted everything for the last 6 years, then tried to make them pay £26,000 back, far more than they'd ever received!). If you make an error or need to change something they can only backdate a month or two. If they make an error, they can backdate to the date the earth began.

Lastly, the people who work on the phones in the dept which chases overpayment are the biggest bunch of see you next Tuesdays ever.

There speaks the voice of bitter experience!