Went to London to see private Dr today as I haven't been seen for so long (my midwife changed my appointment originally planned for as soon as I'd return from abroad to a different time I couldn't make, and I've been leaving messages on her voicemail for a week and a half to try to rearrange it but she is not responding to me, called the maternity centre spoke to another midwife there who kindly offered to try and book something for me looking at my midwife's calendar, but could only find me one in two weeks' time! So said it's better to keep trying to arrange one with her and that she would also let her know I am looking for her! ...To think that these appointments are so crucial for me as they are meant to monitor me between my consultant appointments. E.g. according to NHS consultant, bigger fundal measurement could mean more fluid, which could indicate baby could also have my son's condition, intestinal atresia! So I'd be sent for an extra scan to get checked.)
The worrying thing though is that I've never ever seen the same midwife twice anyway! Every time someone else replaced my assigned midwife, and every time happens to be a different person that I see for the first time. Which means I have to repeat my stuff over and over and I feel it's pointless as it cannot really be properly followed up. When a different midwife every time just jots down in my notes whatever I tell her and then just hands my folder back to me!
Dr was very frustrated that my consultant has only been monitoring the growth of that mass of mine when its actual position is also so crucial. He unfortunately found it to be so so low, that natural birth is absolutely impossible. He says there is no way the mass will move now as everything has already grown loads and uterus, ovaries and everything have been pulled upwards, but the mass hasn't been pulled up with them, so that's where it will stay now 'til the end.
So he wrote a report for nhs where the words OBSTRUCTION, and IMPOSSIBLE natural birth are in capital letters. Accompanied by a shocking scan of the baby's head, my cervix and the large mass right behind it, already obstructing it. The baby won't even have a chance to drop properly into my pelvis, let alone travel though an obstructed birth canal.
Very gutted as I was dreaming of a natural water birth to follow hypnotherapy techniques, like with my previous baby...BUT I also need to plan as I have a toddler to consider and look after too. NHS consultant said there is no point planning for a c section until close to the end, close to birth - but if things aren't gonna change, why leave me hanging, unable to plan?? Letting me even think (when I specifically asked) that I can even try giving birth naturally first before considering c section?? I would love to try naturally first, but never if baby is to get distressed, never at the risk of my baby's life!
I'm so so sorry for the monster of a post/huge rant girls
seems I really needed one, it's been a while lol
Thank you for listening and love to all of you xx