Preparing for battle

[Tara1985]

Good luck Cos, don't let them bully you!!! Did you read Maria1977 labour thread? I read that and felt so so sorry for her because although the consultant may have had good reason to do a C-Section it really did sound like there was and he put her under immense pressure.

Hopefully this won't happen to you and you will get the birth YOU want!

xxx

 

[Amyrose]

good luck for today hun if anyone can twist there arm you can x

 

[Spinneygirl]

Hope today goes your way hun, thinking of you xxx

 

[Emily0505]

Hope all went well for you today hun

XX

 

[cosmicgirl]

Arrggghh it didn't go very well tbh.
I said I didn't want constant monitoring, I didn't want induction (if I went overdue) and I wanted a water birth.

They've said -
1) they want constant monitoring so they can act on any subtle early signs of rupture that may be missed with intermittent hand held monitoring.

2) water birth is out of the question because of monitoring (see above)

3) if I go 12 days overdue they have to induce because risk of rupture increases as you go overdue. Risk of rupture also increases with induction so that is a definitive case for constant monitoring.

4) I have to be on delivery ward, no pools here

I am meeting with the head mw as I'm not happy, I'm losing control of this birth and I'm pretty deflated by it all tbh.

Or (my one choice in all this) is to admit defeat and have another section. Erm, no thanks, I'd rather put pins in my eyes than have another section!

F@cking c section has screwed me right over!

 

[AugustMum]

They can't demand constant monitoring. Is someone going to be watching the machine the whole time or just every 10 to 15 minutes? If its the latter then tell them they can monitor you just as well intermittently.

I can't help with the other things. It's why I'll be demanding a home birth. They'd probably wait till your in labour and tell you what they're doing then regardless of what's been prearranged

 

[Tara1985]

That is not the best outcome, sorry hon. I'm hoping the head MW will give you a compromise that will make you happy.

Is a home birth completely ruled out?

xx

 

[cosmicgirl]

They would rather compromise on the situation in hospital than consider a home birth.
I asked about the monitor and they said that although it's not constantly attended it allows them to look at the trace that has been pumped out so it's easy to see what's been happening when they aren't there iykwim.
I hope we can reach a compromise because at the moment I feel like all of my choices have been taken away.
I don't want to be irresponsible but I do think there is room for negotiation x

 

[lisaloo]

Fingers crossed for you hun, i really want a water birth, but i had a c section with my first child. my midwife told me that it is possible for me to have a water birth and id have to discuss it, but she seemed pretty confident!! She also said some midwifes have more experience with this than others and she basically told me if they refuse, change hospitals to city hospital where they definatly will say yes as the head midwife there specialises in this ive had normal births with my other two children.

 

[cosmicgirl]

Did she say you could have a water birth at the hospital?
I'm not allowed one because I'm not allowed to labour in the birth unit, only in labour and delivery suite where there are no pools. Plus they couldn't hook me up to the bloody constant monitoring! x

 

[CARNAT22]

Sorry to hear it didn't go too well hun,

I guess it's a bit of a catch-22 as I assume they want to monitor you to ensure you don't end up in the same situation as you were before?

I would suggest that you make the best of a bad situation, if there is no room for negotiation after you meet head MW then you can still apply the principles of a calm birth despite being on the labour ward?

You don't have to take any drugs and surely you can still be mobile to a degree? You can take lots of distractions (books, iPod, snacks etc..) and make it as non medical as you possibly can.

Ideally I want to go to the birthing centre but I may not be able to (it may be full, I may need monitoring) so I am going to have a contingency plan and make sure I have as natural as birth as possible regardless of where I actually give birth

xxxxxxxxxx

 

[cosmicgirl]

My problem is is that when I had constant monitoring with the twins, every time I tried to move, the bloody thing lost contact. So they told me I had to lie still on the bed.
This made the contractions unbearable and I couldn't labour that way, I had to ask for an epidural.
So I know I'm not going to be allowed to be mobile, as I'm attached to this machine by a short lead, if I move it's likely to lose contact and the alarms go off.
I know I can't labour lying down, so if they insist on constant monitoring, I'm heading for an epidural straight away.
I didn't want an epidural this time.
Also, I'd I have an epidural, I have an increased risk of an instrumental delivery, I had forceps and episiotomy for twin 1 last time - I don't want that again.
It's everything I didn't want.
I can't have a natural 3rd stage (which I wanted) because of the bloody scar.

I had every procedure and intervention known to man last labour (epi, episiotomy, constant monitoring, c section and blood transfusion) it was hideous. So this time it was really important to have as little intervention as possible x

 

[cosmicgirl]

Plus the risk of uterine rupture after 1 section is less than 2% x

 

[Hope81]

What I would do in your situation is to do everything they suggest.
For one and only reason if sth happens I will never forgive myself...
Being constantly monitoring is nth compared to the bundle of joy that you will get after that.
Also where you have a choose is the pain relief. I would try the CDs and classes of hupnobirth.
try to transform an unpleasant experience to a pleasant one.

Btw call me crazy but If I dont go for elective c section (for multiple reasons) they better give me constant monitoring... I am not willing to take any risks as small as those could be.

Good luck I hope everything goes as good ad possible

 

[CARNAT22]

My problem is is that when I had constant monitoring with the twins, every time I tried to move, the bloody thing lost contact. So they told me I had to lie still on the bed.
This made the contractions unbearable and I couldn't labour that way, I had to ask for an epidural.
So I know I'm not going to be allowed to be mobile, as I'm attached to this machine by a short lead, if I move it's likely to lose contact and the alarms go off.
I know I can't labour lying down, so if they insist on constant monitoring, I'm heading for an epidural straight away.
I didn't want an epidural this time.
Also, I'd I have an epidural, I have an increased risk of an instrumental delivery, I had forceps and episiotomy for twin 1 last time - I don't want that again.
It's everything I didn't want.
I can't have a natural 3rd stage (which I wanted) because of the bloody scar.

I had every procedure and intervention known to man last labour (epi, episiotomy, constant monitoring, c section and blood transfusion) it was hideous. So this time it was really important to have as little intervention as possible x

Well that does make things a lot more complicated

I assume you pointed all of is out to the consultant? And it didn't make any difference.

How annoying, I really hope you are able to persuade MW to help you hun as I totally agree that the choice should be yours and you need to be comfortable

xxxxxxxxxx

 

[Princess81]

Have u thought of hiring a doula?? They are fierce x

 

[cosmicgirl]

Yeah, I pointed this all out and they didn't budge
I can see me strapped to the bloody bed with an epi

 

[Me, My Girls & I]

do you know mervsmum who used to mod on here? Can't remember when she left, but shes a doula and very clued up on vbacs! In fact, I'm pretty sure I've seen you somewhere where there's a homebirth section iykwim? and I know she's active on there! I hope you can find a middle ground with them xxx

 

[cosmicgirl]

Have u thought of hiring a doula?? They are fierce x

I did think of that.
Tbh as scared as I am of hb's, I did think of hiring an independent mw and having a hbac.
My problem is that I have anxiety, which makes my contractions worse.
So if I'm worrying about rupture or things going wrong at home, I'll panic, which will stall my labour x

 

[kedi376]

Hey hun, I don't really have any advice, especially as I've never experienced labour. Just wanted to say sorry today didn't go as you wanted it. Keep trying though and maybe they will compromise in some areas.