Hydrocephalus - Our baby has now been born - Birth Story on page 18

[Mervs Mum]

I dont really know what to say.

 

[Toonlass]

Oh hun, i don't know what to say xx

 

[Sam's Mum]

There should have been someone available to give you all of that information yesterday instead of sending you home with those pills not knowing. I'm so sorry - I don't know what else to say either x

 

[Rosie's Mummy]

Im so sad for you but at the same time I respect what you have just written - I dont think I would know what I would do unless I were in your situation. Huge respect to you. xx

 

[inky]

I haven't got the words, I'm so sorry x

 

[rakrak]

oh sammy, im so sorry x
sending big hugs to you as i can't think of any words that will make you feel better xxx

 

[ToffeePop]

Nothing can be said to make this easier for you , except that I still think that it's incredibly brave to post about this at all and seek the support required as asking for help is a BIG deal - in any way.

I agree with Sam's mum that this is the info you should have been given before being sent home with "pills". This is a terrible time for you and I hope you give yourselves some time to learn to deal with what has happened, but to never lose hope and faith - in whatever may be appropriate - that life has a lot of positives too.

I am terribly sorry to read your story

 

[katiejane]

Oh sweetie, i'm so sorry. It sounds like you asked everything you wanted to and investigated every possible option. You've been very brave and strong throughout this, and its so sad what you've had to go through. Have you been give om going support and have they explained what happens now better than you were told yesterday. You remain in my families thoughts xx

 

[xxsammyxx]

Hi,

I am not going to take the pills to stop her heart... though if people have taken this option then i dont blame them either its personal choice, there is no good or bad thing to do its just how people would handle it better and for us its this way. It wont make any difference to the outcome as they will not offer her support when she comes out anyway, alive or not. It just means we may be able to say goodbye to her before she takes her final breath.

Its all about funding this... they could, if they wanted to, monitor how she went over the next few weeks, bring her out before brain damage set in but they wont. They know MRI scans cost a fortune to do all the time and to keep the baby on life support as well. There is a price on her life that they are not willing to spend

I hope she will make it through the journey and survive just long enough for me to tell her how much i love her and how much she was wanted and how I only wanted the very best for her... to reassure her that her grandad is now going to look after her in heaven so she will be spoilt rotten.

I will never forgive the Law for not trying to help her further... maybe one day this will happen to one of them (though i wouldnt wish this upon anyone) and they will realise that money is no object against the chance of life.

 

[Mervs Mum]

Why dont you come home to the UK? Maybe it would be different here?

 

[evie_smith]

i agree money is no object against life but i agree with mevs mum come back to the uk and see if docs over here can help as its 24 weeks over here x x

 

[Sam's Mum]

I don't understand why they won't support her and give her all the treatment they can when she is born? How can they refuse to do that?

 

[titch]

Im so sorry. I hope they gave you all the time and attention you deserve, I wish you couldve had better support all along. Thinking of you xxx

 

[xxsammyxx]

Why dont you come home to the UK? Maybe it would be different here?

I havent lived there for 5 years, im not registered there and cannot get NHS help now... I think our odds would be the same. A huge huge risk since she is so sick. I just feel dead inside. I will never ever forget her.

 

[joanna0110]

I'm so sorry for you sammy you are in our thoughts and prayers x

 

[Sam's Mum]

 

[Mervs Mum]

Why dont you come home to the UK? Maybe it would be different here?

I havent lived there for 5 years, im not registered there and cannot get NHS help now... I think our odds would be the same. A huge huge risk since she is so sick. I just feel dead inside. I will never ever forget her.

That's not true. You are entitled to free health care in ANY EU country. My work colleagues daughter has lived as an aid worker all over Africa for 10 years and came home to have both her babies. She's due this month with her second. You can come to the UK and you are entitled to health care.

 

[xxsammyxx]

I don't understand why they won't support her and give her all the treatment they can when she is born? How can they refuse to do that?

They said its selective abortion... if I went into labour naturally early they would fight for her life... i agreed with what you say. Why the hell cant they fight for her life NOW! Whats the god damn difference??? She has no brain damage, she is still a living human being. But no, they are not going to help her if she is born alive, they will watch her take her last breathes trying to breathe on her own and just watch her until she has to give in. What a f***ed up world!

 

[Sam's Mum]

That's terrible

 

[Mamafy]

I have no idea what to say I would seek advice outside of Holland tbh. They have a very poor view of what a 28 weeker is capable of, truly . My son as you know was a 28 weeker and he is the brightest child you have ever saw.

No-one can make this huge decision for you but if you have the slightest twinge of doubt do seek advice from another country. I'm sure if you were willing we could speak to Lea and maybe get some numbers here in the UK?

The law stinks but laws differ in different countries.