can you actually afford to have a baby?

[littlemiss83]

is there only me that's not got much money but i don't stress? i have no debts and if i don't have the money for something i don't buy it. i do treat lo but she is still too young to care or notice yet. im actually happy as i am i know that often people with the most money end up the most stressed! i suppose because u live to your income they have more outgoings to worry about. or maybe its because my rent is super cheap lmao xx

I remember what its like to have that mindset - it doesn't matter if we're skint, we have all I need ect. But trust me it gets so so difficult the older they get, its all nicey nicey buying lovely baby clothes but there gets to a point where you are CONSTANTLY buying clothes, including bits off parents ect. Shoes, bags, clothes, school/nursery trips, school uniform (and yes you do still get a grant but its only £30 or there abouts) which is probably just enough to get 1 pair of shoes, I spent £100 this year on uniform & thats not including birthdays, xmas, day trips, food, ect ect. Trust me hun...it gets alot worse & I personally think its best to prepare for that rather than expecting your parents to keep buying clothes coz it isn't just clothes...Out of my wages I spend literally hundreds of pounds a year, would be interesting for someone to do a quick sum of how much us mums spend, and thats money that hasn't increased, its ALOT more than any benefits I get - ok baby might be alright not having brand new stuff & i'm all for 2nd hand, done it myself but they only stay tiny for a while dont they - as soon as they hit school thats it....(everyone in my class has........can i have it please) and its a £300 games console...and if you dont get it, yours is the only one that doesnt & risks being "the odd one out" - does that make sense - sorry if i sound rude, I just often think that mummies with small babies have no idea at all the costs that are concerned, I had to learn the hard way & tried to fight it.

 

[littlemiss83]

I actually have a question for everyone here, some of you seem a lot more clued up than I am about these things...

I know a woman, she has a son and is with a new partner, he's a self employed manual worker of some sort. She's going to college, but also put up a status on FB a while ago about being stuck in the job centre and how much she hates it.

They go abroad on holiday a fair bit, run a car and a work van for him.

Does anyone know if this sounds right?? I can't personally see why she'd need to go to the job centre unless she was claiming? And if it is legitimate, does college cost her anything if her fiance is working? I'd love to go to college - Want to work in the catering industry but have been put off doing it now by the costs.

Hmmm this is a tricky one. I dont see any reason for her to visit the job centre if she isn't claiming something. Which means she must receive some DSS payments (on top of tax creds/C.Ben) I THINK you're allowed to claim JSA if your doing a part time course (under a certain amt of hours per week) and sometimes the job centre put you through good courses but theres rarely the spaces. If she was down as living with her OH & he was on a good wage then she wouldn't qualify for any DSS as they would expect OH to cover it. So he's either on a rubbish wage or she's not telling the whole truth about who's living there. He may not officially live with her, remember you only have to have someone live with you 3 days or more to be classed as living together - he might only live there half the week.

 

[Happyfeet]

I actually have a question for everyone here, some of you seem a lot more clued up than I am about these things...

I know a woman, she has a son and is with a new partner, he's a self employed manual worker of some sort. She's going to college, but also put up a status on FB a while ago about being stuck in the job centre and how much she hates it.

They go abroad on holiday a fair bit, run a car and a work van for him.

Does anyone know if this sounds right?? I can't personally see why she'd need to go to the job centre unless she was claiming? And if it is legitimate, does college cost her anything if her fiance is working? I'd love to go to college - Want to work in the catering industry but have been put off doing it now by the costs.

Hmmm this is a tricky one. I dont see any reason for her to visit the job centre if she isn't claiming something. Which means she must receive some DSS payments (on top of tax creds/C.Ben) I THINK you're allowed to claim JSA if your doing a part time course (under a certain amt of hours per week) and sometimes the job centre put you through good courses but theres rarely the spaces. If she was down as living with her OH & he was on a good wage then she wouldn't qualify for any DSS as they would expect OH to cover it. So he's either on a rubbish wage or she's not telling the whole truth about who's living there. He may not officially live with her, remember you only have to have someone live with you 3 days or more to be classed as living together - he might only live there half the week.

I don't see a reason for it either. She's doing a teaching assistant course and volunteering p/t in a primary school, he lives there permanently working for himself but with a friend. Not sure if his wage is low or not but he is always working so I guess it must be ok (must be as they're about to go on their second holiday abroad this year plus loads of day trips/shows in London etc). She's also been to college before, a few years ago before her son was born. I'm just curious as to whether the college was discounted really, if it was then I can hopefully do the same once baby is born and a little older.

 

[babyem]

I actually have a question for everyone here, some of you seem a lot more clued up than I am about these things...

I know a woman, she has a son and is with a new partner, he's a self employed manual worker of some sort. She's going to college, but also put up a status on FB a while ago about being stuck in the job centre and how much she hates it.

They go abroad on holiday a fair bit, run a car and a work van for him.

Does anyone know if this sounds right?? I can't personally see why she'd need to go to the job centre unless she was claiming? And if it is legitimate, does college cost her anything if her fiance is working? I'd love to go to college - Want to work in the catering industry but have been put off doing it now by the costs.

Hmmm this is a tricky one. I dont see any reason for her to visit the job centre if she isn't claiming something. Which means she must receive some DSS payments (on top of tax creds/C.Ben) I THINK you're allowed to claim JSA if your doing a part time course (under a certain amt of hours per week) and sometimes the job centre put you through good courses but theres rarely the spaces. If she was down as living with her OH & he was on a good wage then she wouldn't qualify for any DSS as they would expect OH to cover it. So he's either on a rubbish wage or she's not telling the whole truth about who's living there. He may not officially live with her, remember you only have to have someone live with you 3 days or more to be classed as living together - he might only live there half the week.

I had to go sign on when my OH was out of work and I had a PT job and went to college. I wasn't receiving anything so it is possible.

 

[Happyfeet]

But babyem, your OH wasn't working and you were only working p/t, so it's not really the same situation. Xx

 

[tinks77]

She could be signing on to job seekers but might not be getting any money from the job centre but they will still do her national insurance credits which go towards your state pension. if her course is classed as part time she can still actively look for work and get these

 

[Happyfeet]

I've no idea what it's classed as, she's there a few days a week?

Off topic, but I grew up in Worthing!!!

 

[tinks77]

Dunno colleges define if it's part time or full time courses and it's can be totally random to be honest lol
Sunny old Worthing, been here over 20 years now

 

[babyem]

But babyem, your OH wasn't working and you were only working p/t, so it's not really the same situation. Xx

Ahh sorry didn't see that. depends how often he getsjobs in i suppose..xx

 

[Happyfeet]

Think I'll have to do some research when I'm ready to do a course, hope it's not too pricey as I sooo want to learn more about food, other than just eating it haha.

I miss Worthing so much! Moving back there one day hopefully! Xxx

 

[tinks77]

We've lived a couple of other places growing up and moved her when I was 14, thought it was so boring as we lived way out of town and not so good on the old purse when clubbing but now I'm glad we stayed as I think it's a lovely place to raise a family

 

[Happyfeet]

The children are the main reason I want to go back, there's no Lido in Kent

I lived in Offington corner and DH in Findon Valley which was a pretty decent distance from town with good bus links so I'd aim for there if I had the dough!!

 

[Humesy]

People still have to sign on for their tax and stamp x

 

[Happyfeet]

What's the stamp part? Sorry for sounding dense here, but in all reality, I am dense lol xx

 

[LikeJohnnYoko]

What's the stamp part? Sorry for sounding dense here, but in all reality, I am dense lol xx

"The stamp" is the National Insurance Stamp, basically if you are out of work and you sign on you get your National Insurance contribution paid by them.

The benefit of this is that you then don't have a gap in your contributions if you need to claim sickness or your pension.

Even if you are not entitled to any money on Jobseekers, you can still get the stamp by signing on. I believe if you are on long term sickness benefit or Income support you get it automatically.

 

[Happyfeet]

Oh right thanks! Was worried it was something I should be doing as I don't work - SAHM

 

[tinks77]

Yeah you get it automatically for all benefits for the period you claim for

 

[Sue Clare]

I agree that children get more expensive, the older they get! My 10 year old wanted a £75 superdry coat & a £40 superdry school bag, an apple Mac computer, iPhone.......the list goes on xx

 

[Humesy]

I agree that children get more expensive, the older they get! My 10 year old wanted a £75 superdry coat & a £40 superdry school bag, an apple Mac computer, iPhone.......the list goes on xx

'wanted' doesnt sound like she got it all tho?!?! haha !! love it! i dread my boy asking for those things, what makes it worse is all the kids that age have these things xxx

 

[misscrazycooki]

I agree that children get more expensive, the older they get! My 10 year old wanted a £75 superdry coat & a £40 superdry school bag, an apple Mac computer, iPhone.......the list goes on xx

'wanted' doesnt sound like she got it all tho?!?! haha !! love it! i dread my boy asking for those things, what makes it worse is all the kids that age have these things xxx

Not all kids just the spoilt ones. I never had anything like that when i grew up ended up saving myself for all the things i wanted and always valued money x

20/06/2012 - Elliott born at 129 x

11/02/2011 - Leo born at 11:37 x