35 weeks pregnant and partner left for another women

[Blueclass]

Hey sorry to hear baby back in hospital. My baby was just under the treatment line so had to give formula as long as breast and expressed milk. Luckily she didn't need the lights. How is your recovery going, do you have much help x

 

[Luciec]

He's under the light so not much fun as can't pick him up much other than to feed and wind
I am in so much pain and just want to feel normal I think just want to start moving on and in order to do that I need to get back to every day life which is so hard when it hurt even to walk a few steps
I have my parents but as much as I love them I just want to get back home and settled without him as being here just reminds me how eventually I will be alone with 3 boys and the sooner I get us a routine the better for us all

 

[Blueclass]

Yes it is incredibly painful. Fingers crossed your start to feel better soon and can get on with things.
Are you going to let your ex visit whilst your in hospital x

 

[cassi]

Congratulations on your baby boy! As said above you miss the man he used to be, now he's good for nothing and you deserve better. Enjoy your little bundle, I hope he gets better soon, Jakob was jaundiced too and they usually get them all better pretty quickly don't they xx

 

[Luciec]

I feel like I have gone backwards since having the baby it's like it's all just happened again and I sit and cry over him whiles he's feed nothing I kind of thought maybe he would care once the baby arrives but he really doesn't he doesn't care how much I'm struggling after the operation
I just don't understand how he can be so happy with someone else so quickly even after knowing his baby is here apparently they are talking about marriage yet it was meant to be us getting married this June how can he be so cruel and so happy with someone new how can u fall in love whiles. Another women is pregnant I will never understand and just wish I could stop over thinking it I feel so emotional and angry

 

[Blueclass]

I'd be furious too but you need to let go and focus on getting better. He will do the same to her at some point don't worry they will get what they deserve xx

 

[Luciec]

Let him meet his new born son and he barely looked at him has since not asked how he is either how he can treat a newborn baby like this is so shocking but nothing surprises me when it come to him anymore as stupid as it sounds I kind of hoped if he saw the baby he would feel something and realise what a mistake he had made but nothing at all

 

[Blueclass]

Hey, I wondered if that would happen to.
I'm sorry your going through this his such a dog.
How you feeling physically x

 

[Luciec]

I'm getting there having three kids alone is super hard whiles recovering and being stuck home I think make it harder as you have to much time to go over things in your head on top of baby hormones
I'll be glad when I'm 100% and can start over and enjoy my babies as they are amazing and I couldn't bare a day away from them let alone 9 weeks and as for my new baby he's my fresh start and I hope one day he realised how he's missed out on all of his first and his life that's his choice and he may be having another baby but he can't always act like my kids don't matter one day I hope it hits him

 

[Blueclass]

Oh it will im sure! It's his loss and your be back to normal soon and start enjoying life again xx

 

[cassi]

What a horrible little man, it doesn't seem like it now but you've had a lucky mistake. That bitch is stuck with him, sounds like they deserve each other. Big hugs xx

 

[Luciec]

Doin ok recovery wise my heart is still completely broken by it all and having his baby seems to have brought back all the old feelings
He is now saying after 10 weeks of not bothering how I am out of order as I have now told him I think court is the best way to set up an agreed plan so he can't let his kids down
I offered him days and times and he turned them down at the beginning he has not brought his children a thing since he left and I am the one getting messages saying how much children will hate me for all of this
He is so convinced I'm in the wrong and he's done nothing wrong at all drives me crazy
Ihis family have told him lies that they were messaging me and I deleted them all yet never received a single message so he send messages telling me how I Changed him and he's now a much better person since leaving me which hurts that rather than believe the mother of his children he's believing all their lies
Do u think it's wrong now that I'm saying court is the only option I let him in my home and had to deal with him telling me how in love he is and I don't think I ahold have to put up with that and if it goes to court it's set in stone and my children can't get let down

 

[cassi]

NO!! You are NOT wrong, his behaviour is manipulative and abusive. He hasn't thought about you or your children once in his selfish escapade so don't feel sorry for him, don't listen to his attempts at guilt tripping you. Time for you to turn the tables and serve him a nice dose of karma. He can't have all the cakes and eat them. You are putting yourself and your children first, he isn't. Get a solicitor and let him know further communication can be made via them. Apply for CSA to take the money for the children (including backpay since he left) directly from his pay. And don't let him get you down anymore, he is an asshole, a massively selfish asshole and he doesn't deserve any leniency now. NONE of this is your fault.

 

[Blueclass]

Could not have put it better myself. You are definitelynot in the wrong at all. I would agree that's the best way forward and then you don't have to see him either. Which will hopefullyallow you time to heal and get rid of those feelings. Try to remember his not the man you fell in love with amymore. Now his an arsehole who left you and your children for some tart. Take him to court and tell them everything he needs to see what he did was wrong and disgusting xx

 

[redbear]

Nope not wrong. It's hard just wash your hands of him. Go through csa for money and then courts for access. Leave him to love his sad little life and suck a lemon. He left not the either way around. As for messages ask for print screens. The messages should still be there on messenger even after deleted. But ignore them don't worry yourself about his family just push them put of your life.
It's so hard but it needs to be done. Cut ties. Tell him only to contact you about the children you don't have time for gossip your raising three boys alone and you have better things to do than worry about him.

He just wants to know your sat thinking about him he probably gets off on causing you drama and getting the attention. The best thing to do is smile and wave and not bite. Even if your screening inside don't give him the satisfaction. If he messages about anything other than the boys don't even reply he wants you to bite. Xxx

 

[Luciec]

I'm glad I don't want to have my kids hurt but he has hurt them and he doesn't see that and I have just settled them all whiles having a c section and they have just stopped asking about him I still tell them every night that mummy and daddy love them as I never want them thinking they are not loved
He just wants to be able to pop in and out of my home for an hour a month and that's not what they need at all
The thought of her being around my children kills me inside as I can't believe she has any morals after doin what she has done
I am hoping that court will day for him to build up a relationship again with them again it needs to be supervised at a contact centre as he broke their trust too just not sure court will agree and as for my new baby he doesn't even know his name through lack of him asking and he's not on birth certificate so I'm not sure if he gets any right to him at all

 

[redbear]

I'm glad I don't want to have my kids hurt but he has hurt them and he doesn't see that and I have just settled them all whiles having a c section and they have just stopped asking about him I still tell them every night that mummy and daddy love them as I never want them thinking they are not loved
He just wants to be able to pop in and out of my home for an hour a month and that's not what they need at all
The thought of her being around my children kills me inside as I can't believe she has any morals after doin what she has done
I am hoping that court will day for him to build up a relationship again with them again it needs to be supervised at a contact centre as he broke their trust too just not sure court will agree and as for my new baby he doesn't even know his name through lack of him asking and he's not on birth certificate so I'm not sure if he gets any right to him at all

I'm not sure but I don't think he will if he isn't on the birth certificate. Let him battle it out in court my bet is he won't even try.
If he could be trusted to be regular and consistent that would be different but he has shown otherwise. Xx

 

[Luciec]

Update so I offered him every Sunday to see his two older boys he turned it down said he could do ever other Sunday meant to be first one tomorrow he just cancelled
Also sent a message saying all his new girlfriend wants is him to be happy and to see his children y he feels the need to mention her in an email baffles me
Is it just me or have I done something to deserve this kind of treaty I keep goin over on my head how any man feels the need to be so hurtful especially when I have recently had his baby it still feels so raw and yet he seems so happy with her

 

[Blueclass]

Hey hope your recovering well? Keep all emails ect so if you had to go to court you can prove everything. You have done nothing to deserve this its just him being a prick. Xx

 

[redbear]

Yep keep copies of everything. Also if have emailed back 'keep in mind you could have every weekend you have chosen fortnightly and now cancelled. Just remember this is not my doing. Xxx