*** Working Mum's Support thread ***

[CARNAT22]

James is poorly. I think its just teeth but he has had a temp for twelve hours. Up loads in the night. Calpol brings the temp down so im not hugely concerned but he cant go to my sister.

Big arguments about which one of us stays off. OH was happy to but he losses a days pay whereas I get paid but have so much on.

Poor James is thankfully still asleep.

Ive been up every few hours and feel like shit. OH was the same tho.

Hate days like this....

X

 

[Emily0505]

Its the worst when they are poorly isn't it.

My mum has Cam when I work so even if he's not feeling great he can still go to grandmas. If he was really under the weather though and properly poorly I would stay home with him rather than send him off.

I always feel so helpless when he's ill.

XX

 

[CARNAT22]

James is all better now, he just had a temperature and was a wee bit off his food, he was just dandy with Daddy yesterday so back to normal today.

Roll on next week though, I have a week off (and we are going on our first family holiday )

X

 

[Emily0505]

Aww glad he's feeling better.

Yay for holiday! Where are you going?

XX

 

[CARNAT22]

We're off to Kefalonia.

Can't wait but the amount of stuff we have to take is lunacy - although maybe I am taking a wee bit too much??

Ha

X

 

[Emily0505]

Ooh very nice!!!

I always take loads when we go away with Cam.

My mantra since Cam has arrived is 'It's better to have it and not need it than need it and not have it'

Doesn't help me to travel light though!

XX

 

[CARNAT22]

James is taking more than I am, and I take loads

As you say though you don't want to be caught without something? I am also not sure about buying nappies and stuff out there so I am going to pack some we already have.

Very excited though, although I have never been on holiday with a child or whilst pregnant. I will miss my glass of wine with dinner

X

 

[flisstebbs]

Have fun on holiday Nat, Kefalonia supposed to be lush. Did i see on another thread you're having a scan before you go?

Sorry to hear of the poorly babas out there, glad I haven't had to have this "who's busiest" contest with DH, although he is down as first contact for nursery as he has to do drop off and pick ups.

 

[CARNAT22]

I've been before Fliss and Kefalonia is indeed beautiful. It's my fave Greek Island out of all those I've been too.

Scan is tomorrow, in-fact in 25 hours time

It's awful having to decide which one of us "has" to look after the poorly baby, although James wasn't poorly as such. If he was properly ill there is no doubt - I'd stay with him and stuff work.

X

 

[flisstebbs]

I'm sure everything will be perfect Nat but I know how hard it is facing these early scans after the losses, so sending you sticky bean hb dust! I don't work Thursdays, so will be checking in here for your news. x

 

[CARNAT22]

Just a quick Q for the working Mum's...

How much help do you get from OH?

I find that most nights I get home from work and I still end up cooking, doing a wash, etc etc.

OH helps a bit with James, but it does depend. This week he has been travelling a lot to a job so he is out 7am-6pm.. He actually had a nap tonight !!!

I wanted to kick him

X

 

[Roo3]

Oh cooks 2 nights that I don't get home until 6, plus he looks after lo one day a week whilst I'm at work. Oh works from home and is self employed but I still end up doing everything else... Washing, ironing, cooking, cleaning. Oh's job is such that he doesn't work 9-5 every day but does bits and pieces throughout the week so has a lot more free time than I do.

I seem to spend the days I'm not at work juggling lo's groups and classes and housework.

Life will get a lot easier in September as lo will be at preschool for a day and a half on the days I don't work giving me time to do chores and then the days he's not at school will be spent having fun together. It will be more quality time I think than fitted in around hoovering etc.

 

[Msclaireypants]

Hello ladies... I'm slowly creeping in

I've now got 3 jobs! Tiring but worth it!

 

[Weezy]

Hi everyone..
Crossing over from Tri3 for some advice, hope you don't mind.

I'm almost 30wks, planning on stopping work at 38 weeks for 10 weeks then back to full time.
OH will stay home full time and look after baby

Beginning to get a bit nervous now about it. Does anyone have any personal experience they would be willing to share similar stories? I would love to stay home longer however financially it's just not viable.
Hope someone will be able to help/offer advice x

 

[Becky1]

Just a quick Q for the working Mum's...

How much help do you get from OH?

I find that most nights I get home from work and I still end up cooking, doing a wash, etc etc.

OH helps a bit with James, but it does depend. This week he has been travelling a lot to a job so he is out 7am-6pm.. He actually had a nap tonight !!!

I wanted to kick him

X

I get the odd dinner cooked but that's it. I'm only pt so feel like he thinks I should do more! I wouldn't mind but not only do I do the cleaning, shopping & housework but I also get left with the bills & paperwork too... don't get me started on the garden! Good job I love him!! x

 

[Jajis]

He does quite a lot, but he has to be praised for every bloody thing like it's a big deal - unlike me who just gets on and does stuff without needing to be thanked for everything (which is why he has no bloody clue how much I actually do).

I'm part-time too, so I think he feels that I ought to be able to do all the cleaning / tidying / washing etc. on my days 'off' (because that's how he sees them... I personally find them far more tiring than my days at work!), but A only naps for a short while so there just isn't time to get it all done.

Having said all that the small boy has got the pox of chickens so OH had to take the day off on Tuesday so I could go to work - as soon as I got home (before I'd even been able to go for a wee!) he said he was just going upstairs for a moment and when I asked why he said he just needed a little lie down So maybe he's beginning to understand that I don't actually have days 'off' just days when I don't get paid!

 

[CARNAT22]

See we're both FT and he is a decorator so often on his feet for 9-10 hours a day and is physically exhausted.

He does help with James - baths him, gets him ready for bed etc.. But not much else.

He is fab if ever he has any time off (he can sometimes have lulls between projects) and then he has James and the only chore I do is cooking.

It doesn't help that I am so anal I cannot leave dishes in the sink etc..

X

 

[CARNAT22]

Hi everyone..
Crossing over from Tri3 for some advice, hope you don't mind.

I'm almost 30wks, planning on stopping work at 38 weeks for 10 weeks then back to full time.
OH will stay home full time and look after baby

Beginning to get a bit nervous now about it. Does anyone have any personal experience they would be willing to share similar stories? I would love to stay home longer however financially it's just not viable.
Hope someone will be able to help/offer advice x

Sorry Wheezy, I can't help.

I did leave James with OH but he was much older (13.5 months) and I still found it quite hard.

The main issue I can foresee is if you are BF'ing? At 8 weeks or younger [you could go overdue?] baby will still be feeding on demand.

Of course you'll be very tired as baby won't be in any kind of sleeping routine either.

From personal experience there is no way on Earth I would have left James that young, I just physically and emotionally couldn't have.

Sorry - I know this isn't helping you. The US only give women something like 12 weeks maternity leave (I think only 6 weeks fully paid though) so it's not uncommon for women to leave their babies from a very young age - please don't feel guilty.

If there is no choice at all then I would ask how far you work from home? Is there any way of getting home for lunch?

What about flexi-time? Working from home?

It will be tough but I am sure workable?

Best of luck

X

 

[mrswoody]

Just a quick Q for the working Mum's...

How much help do you get from OH?

I find that most nights I get home from work and I still end up cooking, doing a wash, etc etc.

OH helps a bit with James, but it does depend. This week he has been travelling a lot to a job so he is out 7am-6pm.. He actually had a nap tonight !!!

I wanted to kick him

X

I get zero help from OH midweek as he works away and is home Friday to Sunday. Im find it varies on a well basis on how I cope with it all on my own depending on Lady Ms mood and how busy work is/how tired it makes me.
When oh gets home at the weekend he is hands on with M but it's me that does the housework etc

When oh did stay at home he would do as much as he could and we usually took turns on who did the bedtime routine.

x

 

[mrswoody]

Weezy,
Personally taking just 10 weeks maternity leave wouldn't be for me.

There is a lot to factor in and tiredness and Los routine would be my main concern.

It's obviously doable but a decision not to be made lightly.
See about flexi time/working from home if you can.

It's all about striking a happy family and work relationship x