Desperately need some help :(UPDATE 3 page 4 OMG!!!!

[moss]

Jacob is obviously a lot younger, but I recently discovered that when I needed him to stay in his bed, I went to him while he was crying and leaned over and put my face on his, kissed his face repeatedly and didn't say a word. He tried to push himself up a few times, but I kind of flattened him (gently, of course) and he went back to sleep for hours. I was lucky and I know something like that would be difficult for you because you are pregnant, but maybe you could try something similar. We found that when we were picking him up while he was crying, he would wake up more and not get back to sleep until I fed him again. The patting and shhhing didn't help- we had to form a kind of human swaddle.

 

[newmum]

Happy Chick... you didn't say it was cruel I just forgot to quote. I read it earlier in the thread and just pressed reply. Wasn't interpreting your post like that -think it is spot on for what we had to do with our little girl. Sorry for the misunderstanding

 

[happy-chick]

Happy Chick... you didn't say it was cruel I just forgot to quote. I read it earlier in the thread and just pressed reply. Wasn't interpreting your post like that -think it is spot on for what we had to do with our little girl. Sorry for the misunderstanding

No worries hun, just wanted to make clear that I dont think its cruel & just that I felt cruel doing it in the past incase people misunderstood what I meant

 

[Jen & Her Men]

Thanks guys. Well the shushing thing doesnt seem to be working. He is a stubborn monkey and he sees it as a game. He just keeps standing up and putting his arms out to me. This went on for about 1/2 an hour before I gave up as we were no nearer to getting him to even lie down! Never mind think about sleeping!


I am going to give the CC a try I think. I dont think I have any other option left open to me. Im dreading doing it as I am so so tired at the mo and dont know if I have the will power to do it but Im just going to have to try. I will start tomorrow night as we have just decorated his room today so the paint etc is still drying. Hopefully he will love his new room so much he will want to sleep in it...WITHOUT mummy!!

Thanks for the diary Jo, I hope it works for James as well as it did for Ellie

 

[Charlie:-)]

Good luck Jen, hope you get this sorted soon and it doesnt take too long till he settles again

 

[Jen & Her Men]

Well we tried it last night. DH took charge as I could barely keep my eyes open and was feeling rather emotional as it was. He finally went up to bed about 8.30pm and after going to him twice and leaving him to cry for 5, then 10 mins, he finally went off to sleep!! All in all it took about 20 mins which was ace and really surprised me. He then slept through til about 6.30pm and came into bed with me for a little cuddle before we got up.

So we will try the same tonight. He was absolutely knackered last night as he didnt really sleep much in the day so Im not 100% convinced that last night wasn't a bit of a fluke but all we can do is try again!

So a good start girlies! And Mummy feels half normal again this morning!

 

[Kimbo]

Well we tried it last night. DH took charge as I could barely keep my eyes open and was feeling rather emotional as it was. He finally went up to bed about 8.30pm and after going to him twice and leaving him to cry for 5, then 10 mins, he finally went off to sleep!! All in all it took about 20 mins which was ace and really surprised me. He then slept through til about 6.30pm and came into bed with me for a little cuddle before we got up.

So we will try the same tonight. He was absolutely knackered last night as he didnt really sleep much in the day so Im not 100% convinced that last night wasn't a bit of a fluke but all we can do is try again!

So a good start girlies! And Mummy feels half normal again this morning!

wow well done... now i'm deffinately going to give it a go after weekend!

 

[ella]

I did CC with Darragh not so long ago, he is a big boy now and knows how to play games etc. I always timed it - exactly 5 mins go in and lie him down and give him soother and pat him, this makes it easier for me really more than him I think. It worked really well after a day or two, I started with his daytime nap and then night time, he goes to bed now and only cries for a min or two. The thing that helped me when it was getting tough was reminding myself that he needs a good sleep especially with another baby coming and if I give in after say 20 mins I am just confusing him, I found it helped to start when I was sure he was really tired too.

So now when he wakes up and really cries I have a fair idea something is bothering him and he isnt just messing. We used to bring him into our bed but that does not work anymore he just rolls about sits up and thinks its play time, so now he sleeps in the cot all the time regardless and to be honest he sleeps a lot better. You have to persevere you need your sleep!!

 

[Kimbo]

I did CC with Darragh not so long ago, he is a big boy now and knows how to play games etc. I always timed it - exactly 5 mins go in and lie him down and give him soother and pat him, this makes it easier for me really more than him I think. It worked really well after a day or two, I started with his daytime nap and then night time, he goes to bed now and only cries for a min or two. The thing that helped me when it was getting tough was reminding myself that he needs a good sleep especially with another baby coming and if I give in after say 20 mins I am just confusing him, I found it helped to start when I was sure he was really tired too.

So now when he wakes up and really cries I have a fair idea something is bothering him and he isnt just messing. We used to bring him into our bed but that does not work anymore he just rolls about sits up and thinks its play time, so now he sleeps in the cot all the time regardless and to be honest he sleeps a lot better. You have to persevere you need your sleep!!

Omg ella, i didn;t even know you were pregnant!!! wow that is a shock lol congrats!

 

[newmum]

That's great Jen. He might take a bit longer another night if he is not so tired or if he twigs that it is a new technique but if you do it a couple more times I think he will respond to it. So pleased you got some sleep.

 

[ella]

I did CC with Darragh not so long ago, he is a big boy now and knows how to play games etc. I always timed it - exactly 5 mins go in and lie him down and give him soother and pat him, this makes it easier for me really more than him I think. It worked really well after a day or two, I started with his daytime nap and then night time, he goes to bed now and only cries for a min or two. The thing that helped me when it was getting tough was reminding myself that he needs a good sleep especially with another baby coming and if I give in after say 20 mins I am just confusing him, I found it helped to start when I was sure he was really tired too.

So now when he wakes up and really cries I have a fair idea something is bothering him and he isnt just messing. We used to bring him into our bed but that does not work anymore he just rolls about sits up and thinks its play time, so now he sleeps in the cot all the time regardless and to be honest he sleeps a lot better. You have to persevere you need your sleep!!

Omg ella, i didn;t even know you were pregnant!!! wow that is a shock lol congrats!

Thanks Kim, it was a shock to me too but we are thrilled now - cant believe im in tri 3 again so soon

 

[Lou]

Well we tried it last night. DH took charge as I could barely keep my eyes open and was feeling rather emotional as it was. He finally went up to bed about 8.30pm and after going to him twice and leaving him to cry for 5, then 10 mins, he finally went off to sleep!! All in all it took about 20 mins which was ace and really surprised me. He then slept through til about 6.30pm and came into bed with me for a little cuddle before we got up.

So we will try the same tonight. He was absolutely knackered last night as he didnt really sleep much in the day so Im not 100% convinced that last night wasn't a bit of a fluke but all we can do is try again!

So a good start girlies! And Mummy feels half normal again this morning!

I'm really pleased for you!

 

[lea m]

Yay Im glad its working well and I hope it is just as easy for you both each night!!!

 

[Kimbo]

how's it going now jen?
i can't believe the difference in leah since starting cc.
She now just lies straight down as soon as i put her in the cot and she stays laid down until she is asleep with no crying.
Her naps at first were only lasting 30 mins in her cot, but she's up there now and so far it's been 1 hour 45 mins!

 

[NooNoo]

How's it going Jen??

CC was a godsend for me...and will def be doing it next time, if there is a next time

 

[Jen & Her Men]

Well we seem to be doing ok!

Took a bit longer to get him off tonight (only took 5 mins last night) - 20 mins. But he is fast asleep now.

Last night he woke up when we went to bed at 11 but went off again within 5 mins and woke up at 5ish but i left him a couple of mins to see if he would settle himself and he did! Then he slept til after 7!

So far so good!!

 

[Lou]

Thats such great news! Bet you are really relieved

 

[Red_Fairy]

Really happy for you jen may it continue.

My experience with controlled crying . . . Ive tried it weeks on end. every few months with hannah, and gave it completly up last month.
EVERY CHILDS DIFFERENT. Hananh has stanima... and will scream for 3 hours. infact 4 hours. EVERY NIGHT YOU DO IT. going in and out every 10 -20-40 mins makes no difference. Lol. See ANY post from me in the last 20 months. and if somone says 'it works if you do it right' EVER AGAIN to me... i will let them adopt Hananh and bloody try themselves ahaha. im past the 'ohh i cant leave them crying' blah blah phase long ago. haha.

oops... that sound so bitter dosent it sorry.

Emily is soooo different she sleeps 6:30pm TO 8:30am very very RARE she gets up earleir is she dose, i have left her to cry.. and its like two winges, and she settles her self.

So i KNOW its not somthing i do... just that not VERY technique works with every child.

BAH..

sorry.. had to vent.

*not had a full nights sleep in 20 months*


good luck Jen!!!

 

[jennifer1981]

Im really pleased for you Jen! I know how hard it is anyway but couldn't imagine being heavily pregnant and having to go through it as well. You're doing a great job!

 

[Jen & Her Men]

Really happy for you jen may it continue.

My experience with controlled crying . . . Ive tried it weeks on end. every few months with hannah, and gave it completly up last month.
EVERY CHILDS DIFFERENT. Hananh has stanima... and will scream for 3 hours. infact 4 hours. EVERY NIGHT YOU DO IT. going in and out every 10 -20-40 mins makes no difference. Lol. See ANY post from me in the last 20 months. and if somone says 'it works if you do it right' EVER AGAIN to me... i will let them adopt Hananh and bloody try themselves ahaha. im past the 'ohh i cant leave them crying' blah blah phase long ago. haha.

oops... that sound so bitter dosent it sorry.

Emily is soooo different she sleeps 6:30pm TO 8:30am very very RARE she gets up earleir is she dose, i have left her to cry.. and its like two winges, and she settles her self.

So i KNOW its not somthing i do... just that not VERY technique works with every child.

BAH..

sorry.. had to vent.

*not had a full nights sleep in 20 months*


good luck Jen!!!

aw hun I can really sympathise. I had a couple of months of hardly any sleep and that was bad enough never mind 20!!

I really hope you find a solution soon!

xxxxxxx