*March and April mums and babies*

[kitten2014]

thanks for all the tips girls, not looking forward to next wk at all, hubby has offered to hold her but it still wont b easy...

 

[Rooster30]

I'm envious of those who have babies who self-settle. My girl will NOT self-settle and would love her too. She just loves falling asleep on us - at night she'll go into crib for the night just fine, but as soon as she goes from me to crib during the day, that's it, I have a waker!

Thankfully she sleeps well at night, 9pm-7:30am last night. She had formula before bed too so I think that helps!

 

[Allthingsgirly]

I loathe it when your here my anxiety levels go threw the fucking roof!! I can't actually be a mother to my own son, I can't take control & just say no because of fear of the consequences! I wish you would just leave me alone & not take over all the time! I don't have this problem with anyone else just you! I can't stand a mintue with you nevermind an hour, a day or even a fortnight! Wish i could say something but world war 3 will errupt & it's wrong because aren't my feelings important?! Yet i'm made to believe it is all in my head & i have to not be so controlling! What is wrong with actually wanting to do everything for my own son without someone else wading in & taking over thinking thats ok?! Wouldn't do it with anyone else so why me?!

My sOn doesn't self settle during the day he falls asleep on me but when i go to put him down he will either wake up immediately or within a few mintues, he really doesn't like to sleep much during the day at all! I really wish he would & then certain person wouldn't think it was her job to take over the mother role all the time! I am really starting to get bitter & resentful! If it continues once my home is finished no one will see me anymore i can't deal with this anymore all i want to do is hide away from her!

Now i'm crying again i resent people having such an effect that they can make me feel this way! She even had the cheek to mention to my brother about why had i invited such & such to his christening & not someone else like it has anything to do with her! I can't say anything because of fear of upset but also because of what my parents will say,
Im a single parent living with them until my home is finished so it's like i've to basically put up with it as my flat isn't suitable for a baby! Sometimes wish i had been more careful which is a terrible thing to say as i adore my son but it's her making me feel like this

 

[kitten2014]

allthingsgirly, bless you sounds horrible, I guess im lucky that my family live so far away...I cant imagine how frustrating it must be...stand your ground and sometimes things have to be said...better to have WW3 now than build up resentment that causes rifts that can't be mended later on...I had this with my Mother a long time ago, long story short we didnt see each other for 5yrs due to my stubborness (post teen years to blame lol) and now regret that decision but at the time seemed the right thing to do instead of attacking it head on, dealing with it and moving on...hopefully you get some common ground somewhere and can find your way together rather than fighting all the time...

Our lil girl self settles well at the moment but think thats cos when swaddle her, she cant move much so unless she's hungry, going for BM (which seems to be all the time atm, half a day minimum of straining, sleeping, straining, sleeping lol) or about to be sick she cant do very much. She has a mobile to stare at and generally sends herself off after an hour of watching it...

Well last night was a first, after trying to wait it out until she cries for feed, she went from 10pm-3.30am, 4am-7.30am, awake til 9.30am (playmat and tummy time) then nap til gone 12ish (inc car journey to hairdressers), feed again then napping now...doesnt happen all the time but today she seems to need the sleep...I was amazed at her going 9hrs on one bottle though, she is pretty much on 4oz bottles now having found every time she finished a 3oz she cried for more...

rooster have you tried swaddling/dummy/mobile?

 

[Rooster30]

We swaddle but refusing to give her a dummy as don't want the agro that come with them later down the line.

 

[want2bamum]

Ladies, anyone who I bottle feeding, how much is your lo having in each feed? And how often do they go between feed. I'm 100% expressing and just curious to know how much roughly I should be offering him? He sucks pretty much all the time so if I kept giving him a bottle he would keep drinking, even if he didn't need it xx

 

[kitten2014]

hi wanttobeamum, it varies but on average 3-4oz bottles anything from every hour (when cluster feeding morning and evening) to 3-5hrs daytime and overnight, I also wondered about the overeating and when it looked like she suddenly increased quantity we introduced cooled boiled water as she was thirsty in the warmth and that settled her down, you will know if they overeat as theyll spit it back out but I was told once they dont do this as often with breastmilk...

 

[Emmajaine]

Alexis is currently having 4 - 5 oz every 3-4 hours during the day and she is going 5-7 hours overnight.

Xx

 

[Allthingsgirly]

My LO is having 6oz now is that too much at 10 weeks? He generally goes between 3/4 hours during the day sometimes less if he has been quite sick. He is sleeping threw the night now, I've given him his last bottle at 10.10 & he is fast asleep now until morning. I'm thinking of putting him back to 5oz as he isn't as sickly after his feeds but I don't want hi,m loosing weight or being hungry. My son will take the entire bottle even if he doesn't want it & then sick it back again

 

[Snaveanator]

Allthingsgirly my mum was exactly the same with my first born whence was born nearly 6 years ago, I wasn't living with them but saw my parents a lot and we used to have world war 3 due to interfering and criticising. I honestly could not do right for doing wrong. I remember once even asking my mum if she even thinks I'm a good mum, she couldn't even answer- all because I wasn't doing things her way, it was her way or the high way and she would nag nag nag nag nag until you eventually gave in. I ended up swearing to myself that she wouldn't have much to do with my second child, and she doesn't. When she was first born, she made a single criticism and I told her that she is not to come into my home and slag off the way I do things, otherwise she can leave. Luckily she hasn't done it since.

She's taking advantage if the fact that you're a single parent and living with them (ie relying on them), and for some reason she seems to think she's superior as a parent because of that. Firmly say to her 'you are too involved in the care of my son and it is effecting my relationship with him. Whilst I appreciate that you are trying to help, please only do so when asked' and just repeat it to her every single time she interferes.

Baby probably isn't settling well with you as he can sense your anxiety and her firm and authoritative demeanour is probably quite comforting. Take control.

Honestly, I totally understand you and feel your pain! I really really wish things had been nipped in the bud sooner with my mum as it's effected our relationship long term. I did used to tell her that she made me feel completely shitty about myself but she wouldn't accept it. It was Only once I was pregnant again and she made a comment about 'you never listened to any of my advise, you never wanted or appreciated any of my help' to which I responded with 'that's because all you did was critise me, it was either your way, or the high way' in a very confident manor that she realised that I wouldn't be taking so much nonsense this time around. Don't get emotional and dramatic when discussing it with them, be firm and confident and don't allow them to talk you around anything or give you 'their explanation' it's your child. Your rules. End of.

 

[CDx]

Sorry to see you are having a tough time Allthingsgirly.

Just back from Arran getting his jags what a brave soldier I have, a little scream when each one went in and he settled in seconds. He had to get them individually I would have preferred both at the same time. I surprised myself and was brave too especially being on my own. Now having lots of cuddles, 1 proud mummy! x

 

[kitten2014]

bless ya CDx we have that to come next wednesday..

AF has arrived unofrtunately, Im not one of these lucky ones that when on mini pill doesnt have them at all...sigh...have been taking mini pill for three wks now and 8wks since birth, 4 since lochia ended....

 

[Babbybo]

Well done CDx well deserved. I'm already dreading the next ones because of how LO (and then of course I) reacted. Hoping it was only that bad because he had just woken up. Either way its not easy going on your own so congrats!

Oh no Kitten. I'm bf'ing and it looked like mine was starting yesterday but thankfully no more sign. Hoping I get a break at least as long as I'm feeding.

 

[kitten2014]

Im expressing n stil got it but only mild cramps ..

 

[Niknaknoo]

12 weeks into bfing here and no af. Have thought it might be coming once or twice but hasn't shown up yet! Hope this doesn't jinx it!

 

[Emmajaine]

I'm on my second AF, and Alexis is only 8 weeks old, but I had short cycles (23-26 days) before getting pregnant, so looks like I'm back to normal Feeling really crampy tonight

Xx

 

[kitten2014]

bless ya emmajaine, a little meh too but it is totally overtaken by my pride in our baby girl who has today learnt how to lift her neck 45 degrees after 8 weeks of daily tummy time...now she is constantly doing it lol...not to mention trying to put weight on her legs...she's a stubborn lil miss and kept trying even when crying in frustration but has been rewarded with lots of giggles, smiles and milk...hoping for a sleepy baby now but not yet lol...bless her, the way she learned was on playmat with a rolled up towel under chest then later on when I was lying on sofa and she has head at chest height, the incentive being to make eye contact with me, she had such a cute curious look on her face!...heartmelting! makes the cramp worthwhile lol...

 

[Allthingsgirly]

Am I missing something here why is everyone upset about getting there periods back? I was getting worried lol but finally it's here (i know I wasn't pregnant! Chance would be a fine thing .... This is my second 1 since he was born

 

[kitten2014]

allthingsgirly, we're not upset as obviously it means everything working as it should, not pregnant etc etc but guess a few of us were led to believe that either breastfeeding/expressing or switching to mini pill would meana break from periods...I think after a month of lochia post birth, we'd all like a break lol...for me it started on week 3 of the pill which week 4 are placebos so good to know Im going to be regular, could be worse, some have been known to have more frequent heavier periods on mini pill due to the missing oestrogen...I have noticed a reduction in milk quantity when expressing though...

well after last nights amazing efforts by our lil miss, looks like she just wants to show off now, took 2.5hrs to settle her last night when she awoke for nightfeed at 2am, it was feed, burp, settle, sick, feed, burp, settle on me, settle in bed, sick, nappy, feed etc etc...she just didnt want to sleep, finally she nodded off at 4.45 and is still sleeping now, luckily she left me have 2hrs solid naptime after her being awake for so long! Hence why Im now online, will probably try and nap later with her...

 

[Rooster30]

Think I'll be making the formula switch soon. Little lady doesn't seem hugely satisfied by boob anymore so considering giving her a daytime bottle and see if that gets her napping during the day. Whilst she's great at night I need her to nap during the day. My son get zero attention