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Internal scan performed by male

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the thread has been edited to comply with forum rules girls.
 
go back a couple of pages i couldnt possibly repeat wot was said im a lady lol
 
I only said the same as everyone else so I hope you are all of the Christmas card list! x
 
the more heated comments have been removed, and as per the reminder from Sams Mum we can't go down that road again :flower:
 
I had an internal scan done by a male at six weeks with my 1st pregnancy about 14yrs ago & I can tell you, the only thing I was thinking about was if it would hurt and how embarrassing it'd be, no matter if it was a male OR female.

I dare say that what you have read about women wondering if the male would be good looking or whatever, is all light hearted to make up for them feeling nervous at some other male inserting an instrument into their privates! :shock:

If your partner is comfortable with it, I don't see what the issue would be as the MWs, male & female are professionals. What would happen if you had trouble with your private parts & needed to see a doctor in an emergency & the only one you could see was female?

Honestly, I'm pretty sure you're partner won't even remember what the male MW looked like after the internal, cos all she'll be focused on is the scan screen and you :)
 
Princess81 said:
the more heated comments have been removed, and as per the reminder from Sams Mum we can't go down that road again :flower:
Click to expand...

Sorry love, I didn't know anything had happened and I'm on my phone so only saw the last comment, sorry x
 
Its just silly really to think that, if you need an internal scan, you need an internal scan.
If you are not confident enought or have problems trusting your OH, thats a different story.

I havent had a male consultant but it's embarassing experience anyway but most of the times necessary. I wouldnt choose a male consultant but then you wont get much choice if your baby is in danger.
You would want a qualified doctor and thats it.

Just stop being selfish really, its your baby as well
 
Im sorry but thats a ridiculous thing to be getting funny about

If your oh needs to have an internal scan the chances are it will be because its an emergency and in that situation all you should care about is whether she and your baby are ok
who cares if its a man, a woman, a lesbian, someone young, someone old etc all that matters is that they are trained and professional and are there to help

you are being truly ridiculous in your worries, and if you have voiced these thoughts to your oh I really would blame her for thinking completely differently of you now.

I had to have an internal scan when I was about 7 weeks in an emergency, and honestly me and hubby couldnt have cared less who was doing my scan or what they were doing to me, all we wanted to know was if our baby was ok, i really think you need to look at the bigger picture
 
knopk@ said:
Its just silly really to think that, if you need an internal scan, you need an internal scan.
If you are not confident enought or have problems trusting your OH, thats a different story.

I havent had a male consultant but it's embarassing experience anyway but most of the times necessary. I wouldnt choose a male consultant but then you wont get much choice if your baby is in danger.
You would want a qualified doctor and thats it.

Just stop being selfish really, its your baby as well
Click to expand...

I agree :) I think i'd be equally embarassed, male or female x
I remember having one done when they thought I had a fallopian tube infection...I had a camera up my lady part :blush: and then when they didn't find anything, they put me under general and i had a camera put in through my bellybutton x Turned out to be appendicitis!!

The first thing I said to the nurse when i woke up in recovery was "oh no they took my paper pants off!!" :rofl: xx

Another thing to think about too is that women are different from men sexually too...(not all women but most i think) in that although we might find a guy attractive to look at, when it comes to sex it's more about emotions and feeling than it is for men, like its in our minds. (Sorry not meaning to offend any men or ladies out there if that didn't come out right x) I dont think you have anything to worry about x
 
I miss everything!

Nothing to add really except, a medical procedure is a medical procedure regardless of who performs it. It's your fiance's body and ultimately I think the decision on who performs what procedure on her is up to her.
 
Flugel & teampc,

Thankyou for your comments,

I posted this initial thread as i DIDNT want the opinion i had and found great difficulty in succeeding to change my thoughts, thanks to you guys imparticular the advice you have posted is great :dance:

I acknowlage that i need a kick up the back side and i take full responsibility of that,

Now........ how do i go about telling my fiance that i am fine with it? (after days of debating about it), she may just think that i am "pretending" to be supportive now but in reality you guys have opened my eyes for real :shock::lol:
 
just tell her the truth! tell her you found this great site, gots loads of advice and have since had your eyes opened by lots of experienced women who have reassured you in the nicest possible way. Then send her this way and tell her to say you sent her! I'm sure she will find us helpful too :)
 
You could start by telling her you are sorry, you realise you have been foolish and that you were not thinking straight, and after thinking long about it you realise that none of this upset is helping her or the baby, I'm sure she will be grateful for that, good luck,
 
ok so i will admit i haven't bothered to sit and read all the posts in this thread . . . i would normally but there are so many that i really cant be bothered, so sorry if i repeat anything anyone has said!

the thing you have to think of is about 70% of surgeons/consultants are male, so if your fiancée needed an assisted birth or c-section you can almost guarantee it will be a male preforming it! this is why there should be no worries about an internal being preformed by a male, at any stage of her pregnancy! this is also one of the things you could say to your fiancée and explain how it made you realise you were being silly!

inky has it right also, send her our way :) best of luck
 
glad to have helped you see sense

i think the best think to do with your oh now is to sit her down and explain that you are very sorry for what you have said and how it has probably made her feel (if my hubby had said something like that to me I would have taken it as he didnt trust me more than anything else)
explain that you came online and asked for advice and after speaking to people that have been through it you realise you jumped to the wrong conclusions, and in reality all you would want is for her and your baby to be ok

then tell her about this site and that its fab for any questions etc she may have through the pregnancy :)
 
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