In need of moral support . . .

[twinkle84]

please! This baby im having means the world to me and I cant wait. But ive decided to bottle feed him/her, just because I really would rather. Some friends have bottle fed and their babies and really healthy, happy and content. Both me and my partner were bottle fed and we too are perfectly fine, as are loads of other people we know. But I cant help feeling guilty, eveywhere I look or turn theres breat feeding posters and lots of family and friends have just assumed that I WILL be breast feeding, without even asking me. I havnt plucked up the courage to tell them i wont be breast feeding and i feel as though im really doing something wrong and im almost close to giving in, even though its not really what i want to do. Hope some people out there understand? xx

 

[Squeakz]

forget what everyone else thinks. its your body and if you don't want to do it then don't!!!!!! if you know all the pros and cons etc both ways and that is what you have decided to do then go for it!!! xx

 

[bearsmummy]

Hi I never wanted to breastfeed but got guilted into it by my family and hv etc and I regret it so much! It stressed me and baba out no end because she wasn't good at latching on at all so I had to express whisk was again so stressful and demanding. Liv is now on formula and soooo happy and content it's like a new baby! Don't feel pressured it's really not worth it xxx

 

[Emmamb]

U do wot u want to do,I bottle fed my 1st and he's now a very happy,healthy,bright 11 yr old! There's no physical or mental difference between my bottle fed and breast fed children. I actually think as a 1st time mum it was easier for me to bottle feed cos it meant I could adjust to been a mum whilst havin my oh and family to support and help with feeding. I breast fed my 2nd and 3rd and although rewarding it is v tiring to start with x x x

 

[twinkle84]

Thanks so much you 3. Means a lot to read your comments and a big help. I was so confident and sure at first that i was going to be doing the right thing of me and baby, but its so hard to stay that positive with everyone chipping in and all the books, mags, mws and posters. But youve really helped. On my way back to a more confident me! xx

 

[flexilexi394]

Hello! I'm not yet a mum, but I can so see where you are coming from. My main reasons for opting to breast feed are because it's free and I can eventually express when ive established breast feeding. I've accepted it may not happen and I may need to formula feed, and the comments I get are awful! Can't believe some people have such a judgemental problem with formula feeding. Formula is so scientifically studied these days they are as good as I think. I feel for you, and if you feel you can't tell them your going to bottle feed just don't! They will see you bottle feeding then, and realise that's what you are going to do. I dislike the fact that people can't help but stick their noses in. X

 

[twinkle84]

Flexilexi, thanks very much for your supportive comments. It really does mean a lot. Im just scared to tell people and it shouldnt be that way. Im hoping the mw and health visitor are not going to be too bad. I totally agree about people sticking their noses in and having an opinion. I was telling an Aunty about going to a concert in December and she was like 'you wont be able to, you'll be feeding' WILL I???? It so annoys me. Youre right, dont think i will tell them and when they come around they will just see the bottles and i'll take it from there!! Im sure by then when i have my baby and we are happy, I wont be bothered what they think. xx

 

[tinkerbell86]

i'm the same!! It does not appeal to me and i feel that OH has been a bit left out during pregnancy and bottle feeding baby means he can get involved alot more from the start!!

I was bottle fed and if i was breastfed by my mum i wouldn't be here now as she caught food poisioning when i was 3 weeks old and if she had been feeding me i would have died within hours!! So i also don't want to have to worry about what i'm eating/ picking up from food that could harm baby!! But obviously if people want to thats fine but for me knowing how close i could have been to not being here has put me off!!

I am expecting to get talks from the hospital but they will not change my mind and i will do what i want to!!!

 

[twinkle84]

Tinkerbell, wow you are lucky. What a scarey story. Thanks for bringing it up though! I too want OH involved as much as poss. Also I dont want to worry anymore about what im eating etc, ive been totally OTT during this pregnancy. I just want to give everything to the little one and be a happy relaxed mummy at the same time x

 

[number2]

Good luck with bottle feeding, I think you haven't done anything wrong at all. I breastfed my first, and I got on well with it, but seeing friends try and not get on so well, causing them stress, baby blues, feelings of failures, PND. I really think its shoved down your throat a bit too much!
You've made a decision, you have good reasons, please don't feel guilty.
I must say though the amount of posters up, and info you get is overwhelming, and none of it tells you how hard Breastfeeding is, and how bottle feeding is a perfectly acceptable alternative.
And you can be all prepared with bottles, sterilisers, etc, rather than some girls racing out in the middle of the night stressed out having to buy it all when they can't feed.

 

[evie_smith]

I'm planning to breastfeed but just coz I am I def don't expect others too I don't know why some people can't accept others dissisions or comment on oh you will be feeding ect... Breast or formula as long as baby is fed what's the dif lol!! Don't listen to them just wait till baby is here and wt ya bottles out if mw or hv askes how your breastfeeding is going just say very confidentally I'm bottle feeding and leave it like that - always comes down to people stickin their noses in again on "how to care for YOUR baby" when I gave up breastfeeding at 6 months with zander I got the whole oh your not carrying on??? I just said no I'm finished now I have reached my goal and I'm happy - soon shut them up lol and I plan the Same this time and if baby don't latch on I have formula and bottles waiting x


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[mummynmummy2b]

i'm the same!! It does not appeal to me and i feel that OH has been a bit left out during pregnancy and bottle feeding baby means he can get involved alot more from the start!!

I was bottle fed and if i was breastfed by my mum i wouldn't be here now as she caught food poisioning when i was 3 weeks old and if she had been feeding me i would have died within hours!! So i also don't want to have to worry about what i'm eating/ picking up from food that could harm baby!! But obviously if people want to thats fine but for me knowing how close i could have been to not being here has put me off!!

I am expecting to get talks from the hospital but they will not change my mind and i will do what i want to!!!

WHAT??!! Never heard of that before! I agree for people to do what is right for them but there is no way on earth that her having a gastro infection would have passed through breast milk and killed you!

 

[Me, My Girls & I]

i BF my first, and tried with E, but i knew deep down i'd end up switching to formula pretty soon, cos i'm a single mum and there's only 12months between mine! i managed the first couple of days and then switched! at the end of the day, you've got to do whats best for you and your baby, BF was right for me 1st time, but 2nd time it just wasnt! i'd far rather have a happy, well fed baby and be happy myself rather than getting all worked up about BF and ding what's "best" for both of us etc etc! stick to your guns hun, you know whats best for you and your baby and noone else can tell you what to do

 

[evie_smith]

I had food poisoning when I bf my son and I was advised to carry on breastfeeding and did and he was never ill he was only like a week old x


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[MrsR]

I was going to breastfeed but the mire I've thought about it, the closer I've got to birth etc the more I've decided against it! It's just not for me. I hate the fact that you get called selfish and people act as though you're going to be a terrible mum just because you're choosing not to breast feed! I won't be breast feeding and I won't be offering any excuses as to why I won't be breast feeding, my body-my baby-my choice.

 

[sexyamy2005]

a lot of my friends / family are surprised i have said i want to breastfeed, mainly because like its been said, its free, but if it doesnt work out, i am not going to cut my self up about it, as long as the little person is fed, they would only make formula if it was an equivilant to breastfeeding so if it doesnt work out i will be bottle feeding,

like every1 has said, its your baby, your choice, and i agree they should all bugga off adding there 2p worth in and butt out!!

my SIL bottlefed from the begining and like others have said, means OH can take turns and bond, grand-parents and gives you some time off and i dont care what anyone says, we are all gona need a break at some for a little r&r

the only thing thats worryin me about bf is the "stigma" that goes with it and having to try and find somewhere to do it in public and not get funny looks from people, i mean 14yr old girls can wonder round town with there little bras n hotpants on n look like mini jordans n wana be topless models and nothing gets said, but you see a lady bf'ing her baby n she gets dodgy looks n has to find a cafe or what ever that accept bf'ing, what the hell is the world coming too??!!

good luck hun and its your choice
xxx

 

[Zazu]

Do what YOU want to do, your body and your baby! I know loads of people with healthy bottle fed babies!

I am breastfeeding, i really struggled at first and after a week told my health visitor i wanted to bottle feed and she was really against it and didnt give me any information, i was quite upset about it TBH. Even my mum was quite against it, so I carried on with the breastfeeding and it got easier, but i think it is really unfair the way people judge you when it comes to feeding your own baby!

 

[rakrak]

please! This baby im having means the world to me and I cant wait. But ive decided to bottle feed him/her, just because I really would rather. Some friends have bottle fed and their babies and really healthy, happy and content. Both me and my partner were bottle fed and we too are perfectly fine, as are loads of other people we know. But I cant help feeling guilty, eveywhere I look or turn theres breat feeding posters and lots of family and friends have just assumed that I WILL be breast feeding, without even asking me. I havnt plucked up the courage to tell them i wont be breast feeding and i feel as though im really doing something wrong and im almost close to giving in, even though its not really what i want to do. Hope some people out there understand? xx

You're not alone hun! I knew I wanted to bottle feed straight away and was expecting to be guilt tripped into it. I had my little boy 6 weeks early so got a 'talk' from the midwives saying it would be more beneficial to the baby if I tried to express but I just couldn't do it. Was expecting to get a hard time but thankfully they were supportive of my decision...

My little man is now 5 weeks old and is thriving!!! He's gaining weight fast and is growing so much so is very healthy!!! Stay strong on your decision hun if it's what you truely want... Personally I have found it less stressful but if you need anymore support then I'm here if you need me xxx

 

[Squeakz]

im not overly fond at thew thought of BF but ima try it purely because its free!! MIL thinks ima be doing it for 6 months lol but if icant do it i cant do it. Who cares what anyone else thinks! it really is your body your decision!! forget every other nosey parker and concentrate on yourself and your LO
xxxx

 

[Stunned]

Ooh that's entirely up to you what you want to do, never mind everyone else sticking their tup'orth in! I was bottlefed and so was most other people I know and didn't do me any harm. I am not keen on the idea of breastfeeding especially on demand 24/7! My SIL breastfed her babies on demand and I'm sorry to say this but both girls arethe most clingiest children I've ever known!

My midwife, at the booking appt was like "you must breastfeed cos it's best for u and baby!" on and on like that! I was going like "mmm yeah yeah...". I'm seeing her on Monday and I've
written it down in my birth plan that I'm mix feeding so it will be fun to see at she makes of it! But I don't need her or anyone elses permission.

I know that breastfeeding has its benefits but so does formula! So I have decided to try mix feeding once lil Dixie is here so she gets the best of both and so will OH cos he will be able to feed her too.