Leaving work

[Peony1]

Hi all,

I’ve been working in my current job for years now and I was looking forward to getting pregnant not long after I got married but here I am still waiting 2 and a half years later!
I feel stuck in my current job and almost desperate to get out. I could leave and set up a small business from home which I’ve been thinking about doing for a long time but I know if I’m lucky enough to make any money from it at the beginning, it will be minimal. I’m lucky to be in a position where we could afford to live off my husbands wage but I’ve written down pros and cons to leaving my job and still can’t decide what to do. My boss really stresses me out and to put it nicely I can’t stand him lol. Not only that, some big changes are happening at work which I’m not comfortable with.
I’m not asking for you to make my decision for me but I’d love to hear your opinions on what you think about leaving work while long term ttc. I’m not sure what’s worse the stress of being at work or the stress of not earning any money myself! Thanks xx

 

[Sugarpop]

I think if it’s something you’ve wanted to do for awhile and think it’s reasonable, go for it. If you have the security of hubby’s wage being enough to support you both even better.

 

[Peony1]

Thank you. I feel like the only one who is holding me back is me! It would be so much easier if I had a baby already...the decision would be made for me! I feel like my life is on hold a bit until I have a child, which is why part of me just wants to hand my notice in straight away! But then I have the boring sensible side of me going ‘What about the money?’ Boooo to my sensible side lol

 

[SugaryIris]

You can’t put your life on hold whilst ttc, if you want to quit and start a small business and you’re in the financial position to do so then go for it! Do everything you can to make you happy x

 

[Peony1]

Thanks girls x I think I just need to come to a decision and stick to it... the back and forth about it all in my head is driving me crazy! Xx

 

[Bambi42]

Hey @Peony1 i work for myself and we’re not in a position where my OH could cover all costs, and I still manage, even in the quiet times or when people pay late. The freedom is great.
Here’s the question ....What’s the worst that could happen? If your business doesn’t work out you can always get another job.
I think if you’re used to being in a team or a busy workplace when you first set up a business find a space to work where there are other small businesses. It can be lonely working at home alone and when you’re TTC good chat about other things helps x

 

[katie88]

hey hun I was in a similar position to you. I hated the job I was in and hated my boss. I just felt drained every day going in! so even though it was pants timing (as we were having the tests at hospital) I just decided to go. im not self employed but moving job has been the best thing I've ever done! so I say, if you can afford to and it will make you happy, go for it life is too short to work for a company or person that doesn't appreciate who you are

 

[Peony1]

Thanks both. It’s weird cos I expect everyone’s reactions to be like ‘stay in your job’ just because the worrier in me is telling myself that constantly....yet everyone on here is the opposite! Not only that, I’ve spoken to a few people in my family and they’ve been supportive of me leaving (if i want to) too! I think I have a fear that people will think I’m just being lazy and not wanting to have a ‘real job’.... I know that makes no sense because being self employed is far from being lazy but it’s just irrational thinking I suppose!

@Bambi42 that is one of my concerns... I already have an office at home so it would be silly for me to pay for rent somewhere so I am concerned that I may get a little lonely! But then again more and more of my friends at work are leaving and there are more and more idiots who have joined lol so what’s worse...being lonely or having interaction with people who stress me out? I was hoping a pros and cons list of leaving work would help me but it’s only made me more confused because the lists are equal in size!

I’m not going to jump into a decision, but I am going to have a proper think about it and make sure that it’s definitely financially doable! Really helps having all your input though so thanks xx

 

[MoominGirl]

I think if you can manage financially on your husband's wage that's a huge plus point!! One of the biggest lessons I learned from LTTTC was that we tend to regret what we don't do far more than what we do. What would you regret more? Still being in your job in a year's time and still no baby or leaving tomorrow and finding out you were pregnant next cycle? Although it wouldn't be the perfect scenario, after waiting for so long I doubt you'd actually care and you'd find a way to make it work. Everyone always does.

The only time I let my career sway me was when an opportunity came up very close to when we thought we'd be starting IVF. I passed it up only because I had a good maternity/sickness policy in my current job and a supportive manager who knew what we were going through. If it hadn't been for those factors I probably would have gone for the job.

Good luck with whatever you decide!

 

[Peony1]

Thank you @MoominGirl xx

I’m leaning towards staying for a few more months and leaving late summer time now....that way I have time to get my head round the idea and get used to it. Also gives me enough time before ivf to get settled into a new routine. I’m also considering starting my business very slowly in my spare time at the moment just so I have a head start! But I’m still not completely decided yet! Thanks again everyone for your input xx

 

[Mia56]

I think if you can manage financially on your husband's wage that's a huge plus point!! One of the biggest lessons I learned from LTTTC was that we tend to regret what we don't do far more than what we do. What would you regret more? Still being in your job in a year's time and still no baby or leaving tomorrow and finding out you were pregnant next cycle? Although it wouldn't be the perfect scenario, after waiting for so long I doubt you'd actually care and you'd find a way to make it work. Everyone always does.

The only time I let my career sway me was when an opportunity came up very close to when we thought we'd be starting IVF. I passed it up only because I had a good maternity/sickness policy in my current job and a supportive manager who knew what we were going through. If it hadn't been for those factors I probably would have gone for the job.

Good luck with whatever you decide!

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