I'm here already

[Princess81]

So, here I am

As per my thread in First tri, it has been confirmed that I have miscarried.

I am finding it diffifcult to come to terms with.

I suppose my body wasn't a very healthy 'growing ground' for a baby. As most of you know my sister died in December after having been in intensive care for 10 days. A week before this I had an operation for ovarian drilling and a tumour removal from my left ovary.

So my body was recovering from the operation initially and after that I had to try to cope with 3 hours of travelling a day on the underground to get to hospital to see my sister and then a very poor diet and lack of sleep, which continued (and still continues). Also, probably necked a bottle of wine per night to try to sleep and slipped back onto cigarettes for a few days (of course the drinking/smoking stopped as soon as i found out about being pregnant). All this as well as my body and mind being torn with grief over the loss of my sister.

I suppose my poor baby didn't stand a chance. Last week I thought my life couldn't get any worse, over the past couple of days I have found out that it could and did get a lot worse.

Typing it out does seem to help actually, so maybe this can be my journal/diary to vent my feelings on. Usually I am crying so much that I can't speak. At least I can type and cry at the same time

 

[twilly]

I am so sorry, words cannot express and probably do not help any.
Thoughts are with you and also my prayers if you are ok with that.
xxxxxxxxx

 

[cosmicgirl]

Oh princess what an awful time you've had. I'm so sorry about everything that's happened, look after yourself xxx

 

[frankie707]

 

[Laura_C]

Oh sweetie, I really feel for you honey - we too are going through a horrendous time at the moment. Why does it always happen to good people?!

We had a miscarriage, then lost our son, incredible stress at my husbands work all leading to him having a breakdown - so much so I thought I'd lost my husband too. Don't really want to go into details on here.

Piece by piece we are putting ourselves back together and some days I can see light at the end of the tunnel. I have my up and down days and very slowly it is getting easier. I couldn't see how after we lost our son but I have to keep reminding myself that we had our boy for 2 very special days and for that I am grateful

It will get better, I am the type of person that hates drama in my life and just wants a quiet comfortable life. Hate being the victim

You'v been through some of the worst things that can happen to a person in a very short space of time, make sure you look after yourself - you need plenty of rest and relaxation.

Big hugs sweetheart, if you ever need a chat I'm here xxx

 

[Spinneygirl]

Hey princess im so sorry, make sure you get lots of rest and take care of yourself, thinking of you xxx

 

[amyjayne77]

I'm so sorry, what an awful thing to happen

 

[ERIN84]

xxx

 

[hayels]

am so sorry you have had to come to this section. dont really no what to say but am sending big loves and am sure your sister will be up there looking after your angel baby for you. take care lots of love xxxx

 

[charliebear]

I'm so sorry x

 

[heartbroken]

oh hunni what a terrible time you have been through my thoughts are with you and your family.. We are all here to listen whenever you want to talk xx

 

[Butterflykisses]

So so sorry hun. You have been through a really tough time in the last few months. Didn't know just how tough until read your thread Look after yourself and take care.

 

[polo_princess]

Im so sorry hun

 

[Lacey's Mummy]

I'm so so sorry Hun! x x

 

[AugustMum]

So sorry xx

 

[Rowesb]

please don't blame yourself...

I'm sure Caroline is taking good care of your little bean, a little bit of you to keep her company while she watched over you

 

[Me, My Girls & I]

oh jayne, i'm absolutely heartbroken for you thinking of you xxx

 

[JJ Mum]

I'm so sorry this has happened Princess, you have had a terrible time.

Please do not blame yourself in any way, which is what I did after I lost my 12 week angel in march last year- nothing you did or didn't do would have changed the outcome. I too found this section on PF really good for talking to other mums who have miscarried and talking aboutthings really does help - sending you a hug today X

 

[Elfs Mummy]

Hun you deffinatly did nothing wrong please don't blame yourself. i hope that things do start to get better for you and things improve as you deserve a little sticky so much xxx

 

[p1nk11]

oh hunni I'm so sorry for your losses sending you lots of big xxxxx