grrrr

[prettypenguin]

So sick of everyone inc oh questioning my parenting techniques-ffs do i look like I've dobe this before im teying what is called my best!! I'm sorry that's not good.enough for everyone else and im sorry its not working trial and error!! I love how everyone is quick to question or criticise me but they have no suggestions themselves !!!!

 

[misscrazycooki]

Hey hun I know its hard, is your OH helping you out much with your son? As mine did then stopped and did nothing but moan I wasn't doing enough and it wasn't right, to only sit there and not help. I ended up with PND and then he started to help. After I had been to the doctors and put myself on pills.

It is a learning curve I still get things muddled and don't know what my son wants sometimes but I am getting there.

Hugs x

 

[LaurenMM]

Everything with babies is trial and error in my opinion. Its so unfair and I don't think people realise just how shitty it makes us feel. You get told so many different things by family, friends and even the professionals and it makes you quesiton yourself. I've gotten attacked for having a routine, not having one, for FF, for being too protective, literally anything. It's gotten really on top of me that I've started questioning myself and everything I thought I was doing right for my daughter; I'm questioning that too. You're not doing anything wrong hun and Charlie seems like a perfectly happy healthy baby to me. But I understand how you feel and I wish people would stop picking at you xx

 

[knopk@]

I have given up on listening to people, just ignore (easier said than done). Its your baby and you know better

 

[prettypenguin]

Thanks girls, I do question myself loads and when Im seeing the hv or doctor and they sale me things about him I get really unsure and thrn paranoid that I've answered wrong, I was leaving him to cry for a few mins to see if he could just tire himself out in bed and then I could go in and try to settle him and then oh runs up and goes 'why are you leaving him to cry???' Grr cause I'd like a few mins to keep calm. He's also annoyed as I've hid the relationship status on fb though as we had a huge row at the weekend and I didn't want to be with him...and I've not changed it back, mainly cause I.don't feel like his gf just his housemate and mother of child x

 

[LaurenMM]

There was a small period I felt like a baby making housewife to my OH and I just told him outright. My OH is really lovely, he's always helpful etc just went through a period of being really lazy and making inconsiderate comments and I told him straight away as I said I'm not putting up with it, you need to think about what you say and how you say it and since then he's been fine. Is there anyone who could possibly look after Charlie for a bit so you and OH can talk things through on your own?

I had to leave Angel for a few minutes too sometimes just because sometimes she dozes off on her own and if she's really unsettled I just give myself a second to breathe lol. My HV isn't that helpful, its like she'll tell me to stick to feeding Angel 4-hourly and if she's hungry at 2 hours or something like that to give her a bit of water to stretch her out. So I do that and next thing I read somewhere or hear someone saying how horrible it is, how I should just do this and that and I feel absolutely awful. Sorry I'm not being a big help to you hun, just wanted you to know I understand x

 

[prettypenguin]

No you are being a big help its nice that I'm not on ky own...me and oh argue pretty much every weekend its when he's off work lol. It's one of those situations where well argue and I feel like I don't want to be with him, and I end up moaning to my friends and then were fine and dandy til he's off again. But we've been together for ages but only moved.in together when I got pregnant so its lots of change in one year, and I never realised how he just dumps everything anywhere, and I have to tell him things multiple times, like a child! But he seemed really sad abt the fb thing as I've never done it and he asked if I was serious and i said I told you I was to which he.said I thought you were just angry...never takes me seriously...love how I did that on sat and its taken him til now to notice lol x

 

[LaurenMM]

I know what you mean hun. I think you both could do with a good heart to heart together. Hopefully if he respects you and your wishes and tries to be a little more sensitive then hopefully the relationship can be saved. I got so scared when Angel was first born, all we did was argue. He said things without really thinking and I'd get upset, shout at him and cry and we'd make up and the next day we'd argue again, often about the same thing. And I did seriously think at one point I need to leave because I can't deal with this; it wasn't fair on Angel. But I talked to him about it, told him exactly how I felt about everything and he did his best to change it. Obviously I can be very snappy and short with him sometimes, so I worked on that too. Now if he's done something to piss me off I calm down first then try and make a joke of it or just tell him calmy. One thing he does which really pisses me off is instead of throwing chocolate wrappers in the bin, he puts them in his jean pockets and it ends up dropping out around the house and I just say pick the bloody wrappers up now, in a jokey way and he's all like sorry sorry sorry lol. xx.

 

[prettypenguin]

Ahhhhhh ricks murder especially with Easter, bloody cream egg foil bits everywhere, mainly down the couch or on the window sill where ppl can see walking past, dumping his washing on the floor instead of the washing basket, but I made a joke about that on fb and he's put it in the washing basket since lol, must just have to name and shame him. He does try, he just seems to forget days later n its really frustrating, I know its hard for him cause I could take q joke or handle him being so blunt but now I'm always on the defense about stuff. We always end up making friends cause we have a really big bed and I don't like sleeping by myself lol, even if I'm really annoyed at.him I won't make him sleep on the couch lol, maybe we should swap for a single bed I'd kick him out every night then they do say separate beds makes relationships happier x

 

[misscrazycooki]

Since me and my partner have been living apart we seem to get on ok a bit better now x

29 weeks pregnant. Team yellow x

 

[BabyBrain]

Everyone's an expert or a comedian I've found. My OH thinks wikipedia is a parenting manual and has really pissed me off the last few days. I found myself apologising at 3am this morning because I hadn't made enough bottles and had to leave Bertie to cry for a few minutes. Then I pulled myself together and told him to piss off

 

[knopk@]

Or because they had a child they think they know everything. Drives me up the wall. Can they consider for a moment your baby might be different?
sent from my Galaxy s2

 

[prettypenguin]

My mil is bad, she never tells me not to do stuff or anything like that, but she will do stuff like put her finger in his mouth and I don't know if shes washed het hands, but either way I really, really don't like it, I don't even do it and I'm his mum, and she just does it and doesn't ask and its been when were at hers or out somewhere, she wouldnt do it in my home. And she knows i feel too shy to say stuff so last time I had a huge rant at oh and he said he will subtlety tell her. Thing is she used to foster and shes had that many kids she thinks her way is the best way to look after Charlie...what, even better than MY way?? Don't think so!!! Lol xx

 

[prettypenguin]

My auntie on another note is fab, I think if I died I would want her to look after Charlie, she always sees my side of things and like, if I'm sad or annoyed she will be too, and when she looks after him sometimes she always asks me how much food to give him whens his naps etc, she's bought him things in the past that I don't want him to have like I didn't want him having baby juoce when he was younger and she didn't give it him, she always goes by what I would want even if she thinks I'm being too strict/silly, she will still go with it and i have massive respect for her and let her look after Charlie whenever, if other ppl like mil was like that shed get to have him more. X

 

[misscrazycooki]

You never win the war on the MILs i found this out as last night i woke up to my son crying and she was in there like he was hers i was like i am awake now bugger off i just grin and bear it mainly since she is letting me live with her x

29 weeks pregnant. Team yellow x

 

[prettypenguin]

Yeah same sort of thing with me, our mortgage is in her and fils name, we pay it but still is tech their house. Not that she ever comes to visit, always expecting me to go there on foot when it would take her ten mins in the car. She also does this really annoying thing of getting in cs face when he's tired and cranky, gets up really close and then starts waving all these bright colourful noisy toys at him, and passes him round like a parcel, every time we see her and I've said how he just wants quiet and dark an unbelievable amount of times I feel like she's purposely ignoring me, oh said she prob just thinks she knows better than me to which I got rwally pissed off at, next tome we see her of she does it again ill just get him and walk off otherwise I will flip my lid, was sat gritting my teeth last time...its like, he's my child go and adopt one or something if you want to mother someone x