Ex chartstalkers pg or just taking a break!

[Trudyscrumptious76]

Aw Kitty. I do love you!!!! That is it exactly. He could s*ag half the office and I couldn't care less. It's just her - she has to be in the centre of everything. Spoilt brat. Most of the time it doesn't bother me but lately she's really upped the ante. I refuse to be drawn into a stupid confict with her. I've told him she can have him. To which he said does he have a say in the matter! I tell DH everything he feels quite sorry for the other guy. When they meet up it's a nightmare they spend their time moaning about what a nightmare I am. I definitely love DH more than anything. Everything we've been through has just made us stronger. Which is why it's even stranger, if we were having problems I could understand peoples reaction. We don't sneak around or anything, I'll go down to his office and meet him or vice versa in front of everyone (its quite an open plan office in places) Anyone is welcome to come with us but no else one goes out much really. I think I will have a rethink of things and make sure DH is okay with it, I do tend to get myself in these predicaments and then look back and think how on earth did I end up here.

I'd just like to point out it's not all me! I'm not some psycho woman, he'll e-mail me to see if I want to do anything for lunch. Oh dear I'll just keep digging the hole shall I?? The more I type the worse it sounds.

Sorry you're feeling a bit stuck at the mo. I'm sure once the bleeding stops that will help to lighten your mood. Have you made a decision about your holiday, have you found other flights?

 

[Kittykins]

well, if you tell DH everything, then it's definitely the woman you have a problem with! Maybe the solution for the time being is to invite your DH to join you and your friend for a drink after work, if practical? That'll either stop the rumours or treble them

Alternatively you could always invite the girl out to lunch at some point, with some of your other female colleagues, saying loudly that you've noticed she seems a bit afraid of the women in the office, and it's about time she realised that you're all a friendly bunch really. That could be interesting...




yes, I will definitely be happier when the bleeding stops! And hurrah, the holiday company has chartered another plane - so slightly different time, and Heathrow rather than Gatwick, but the holiday's still on. I just hope the bleeding stops fast. ANd that I don't need to continue these antibiotics too long into the holiday - the leaflet says to avoid strong sunlight

 

[Trudyscrumptious76]

It's only lunch times I leave the office earlier than him so never after work. I don't know what they think we could get up to in 30 mins! The mind boggles. Plus his wife knows the score and had a word with one of the guys who was spreading the rumor and told him if she hears about it again she'll break his neck!!!

We've tried that, she's quite happy to come out with the rest of us so she doesn't miss anything, it's only if she arranges something that no other woman is asked. Last time she did it she stood with her back to my desk and asked the 4 lads who worked round me and sorted the details. I was furious. Fortunately I had my headphones in so pretended not to hear, how rude!

My friend said next time she does it he's going to ask if I'm going, to see what she does! I can't wait.

So glad the holiday is all sorted and that you are still going. A change of climate will do you good. The thought of our holiday is carrying me through all the rubbish weather. Only in Britain would a doctor be able to prescribe an antibiotic that says avoid strong sunlight!

 

[Loola]

Well I go away for a couple of hours and a whole office affair has started! Hehe. Trudy, I totally agree with what the others have said, I could never have put it better myself. I have felt the same way about male colleagues. There was a brief time where we had a temporary housing officer here whilst someone was off sick and she was the 'council tart' so to speak, loud, obnoxious, flirty and covered in fake tan. Everything I despise about girls She flirted her way around the office, and although I have absolutely no sexual/loving feelings towards my male colleagues it did really piss me off as they are 'my boys'! How very dare she come in here taking over my office and violating my boys! Thankfully all the lads thought she was hideous and she was gone within about 2 months I think its only natural to feel that way about people you care about and lets face it you wouldnt enjoy your job very much if there wasnt someone you 'clicked' with or cared about as you spend most of your life with these people. I know I have more interaction with my workmates as Im here for around 40 hours a week. I only have a few hours of awake time with my OH each evening. So its completely natural hun! I hope you dont feel awkward around each other for long.

Kitty - so glad you have the holiday sorted. Any idea of what may happen if you dont avoid strong sunlight? Im hoping Gremlins are involved.

 

[Kittykins]

Trudy, I got the impression you must be going out 3 or 4 times a week after work with this guy for rumours to have started! Yikes, if just having lunch with someone is a sign of something, I'm clearly having a lesbian affair with a colleague! Oh bollox to them all is what I say

ok, well if inviting her doesn't work, then maybe you have to NOT invite her! How about a girls-only lunch? Since she clearly thinks she's a bloke, no need to include her... if she looks like she's going to come anyway, it's 'sorry, girls only today. We assumed you'd be having a boys-only lunch...' A couple of those and she'll get the message. If the point of flirting is to impress the women (which sadly it probably is) she'll soon realise that women aren't impressed. Of course if you want to be really bitchy, you could make it an adults-only lunch and invite both male and female colleagues...

Loola - sadly yes I do have an idea. Apparently my skin could be super-sensitised, so strong sunlight could cause it to burn extra easily, blister and flake off. Not so much gremlins as some bizarre Dr Who dissolving disaster!

 

[Trudyscrumptious76]

I really need to get the internet sorted at home. I'm sat in the office nearly crying with laughter and can't tell anyone why! I'm so glad you girls think I'm normal. Had long chat with DH about it all. He admitted he does feel a bit jealous when I tell him about the lunches but not for any sexual reasons, just because he'd love to spend that time with me. We're one of those odd couples who used to work together and never got sick of each other!

Gremlins!!!!! Loola where do you come up with these things! No disrespect Kitty but I now have visions of the lady gremlin (the one in the film where they're in New York) in a bikini by a pool clutching a bottle of antibiotics. Oh dear I think I need to get my breakfast. Might squeeze a quicky in with my colleague whilst the office is empty!!!!

 

[reallyoldmum]

Corr I go away for the weekend and all this kicks off

Kitty so sorry you are not feeling any better but glad they sorted out your flights - Han has been really busy helping people stuck on Skiathos due to the XL thing its heartbreaking....

Trudy what a situation... just a word of warning I had a similar thing happen when I worked for a company and someone that I saw as a friend for 5 years became a bit strange when I left - its a long long and very boring story but it ended up in him leaving his wife on Christmas Day and turning up on my doorstep!! Dave was gobsmacked to say the least and it took some explaining that there was absolutely nothing in it from my side............ I think its a really good thing you are talking to your husband about it......

Well we had a great time in Southampton - just need to find quarter of a million to buy the boat of our dreams and then we can sail off into the sunset!!!!

Jane x

 

[Trudyscrumptious76]

its a long long and very boring story but it ended up in him leaving his wife on Christmas Day and turning up on my doorstep!!

Boring??? Ooooo tell me more!!! Poor Han, have most people managed to get home ok? So many people have been affected by it. I just don't understand how a company can keep taking bookings when it knows it might not be able to fullfil them. I'm glad you had a good weekend. I'm not sure how a newborn will fare on a boat sailing round the world.

For all of you on 'affair watch' I just finished the job I had to do in my mates office and all is back to normal. No weirdness. DH has even told me to invite them to ours for tea. 8)

 

[Flossy82]

Hey all i hope everyone's keeping well. I dont know weither im worried or not today when ive been to the loo i had brown again on wiping im hoping its nothing serious and its just due to this haematoma i feel fine in myself otherwise. Il keep an eye on things and see how it goes. Please, please bean be ok

 

[reallyoldmum]

It was definately a strange situation - I had worked with him (in fact I had recruited him) for 5 years the last 2 we had shared an office; due to me being the HR manager people tended to come to me with their problems etc and to be honest he did share everything with me - when he and his wife lost a baby, when they went on to have his son etc but when I gave in my notice he started acting really off with me - I didnt think much of it as I had been there a long time and a few people were put out - on the night of my leaving do he just put his arms around me and said he didnt know what he was going to do as he was "In Love with me" - I, in my drunken state said yes I love you too and I will miss you but you know I will be on the end of the phone whenever you need me...... Well that was in the October and he started ringing me a couple of times a day - I had a 2 and a half hour drive each way to work and he would ring at 7.30 am and we would chat - he spent the whole time telling me how he had loved me from afar!! He could remember exactly what I had worn to works do's for 5 years back, he knew all my favorite things and made me feel so special!! Looking back I should have stopped it as it started really but to be really honest I was totally flattered - he was 10 years younger than me and a bit of a dish - we never met up but I would talk to him and I didnt "share" this with Dave. I really dont think I encouraged him or implied that there was anything from my side but I was guilty of "flirting a bit I suppose".

Anyway fast forward to Christmas Eve - he rang and said he couldnt go on with his wife and he thought we should just run away together - hmmmmmm I laughed it off and said that now was not a good time to be discussing that sort of thing and that he should enjoy his christmas break with his family - thought everything was OK but Dave and I took the children out for Christmas Lunch and then had some friends back about 7.00 pm there was a knock on the front door and there he was - suitcase in hand and waiting for me to join him!! He had told his wife their marriage was a sham and that he had always loved me!!!! Needless to say she was absolutely furious as were his family.......

It took a lot of talking to Dave who couldnt believe he would have gone that far without us having an affair - my "friend" left after about 2 hours but the sadest thing was Dave left the next day..... We did get back together a couple of days later but if I am being honest it caused huge problems and 8 months later we split up and were apart for 18 months or so..... I put my hand on my heart and say there was never anything more than friendship in it for me - I admit I was flattered and looking back I suspect Dave and I were in a rut, taking each other for granted but it was a really hard lesson to learn.... He and his wife are back together now I believe but I am still really sad as I valued him as a really dear friend and of course lots of my ex colleagues heard about it and some judged a situation they knew nothing about....

Right that's the long story over Makes me blush to even remember it.....

Jane x

 

[Trudyscrumptious76]

Wow Jane, sorry I thought it was going to all be light a fluffy! Sorry you and Dave went through that, at least things are better than ever now. I know what you mean about being flattered though. I know this guy doesn't fancy me but the thought of someone male wanting to spend time with me when they don't have to is nice. Fortunately the thought of anything else is too icky. He's like a little brother to me. Which unfortunately makes me the bossy big sis.

Flossy I'm sure everything is fine, but will pray for extra sticky babydust anyway.

 

[Flossy82]

Thanks hun

 

[reallyoldmum]

Oh Flossy writing my epic I missed your post - I am sure all will be OK honey - I can totally understand why its so worrying for you though. I am sure the doctors or midwife would be happy to talk to you if you are really worried - I would hope after last time they are being really sympathetic with you

 

[Flossy82]

Thanks ROM Its nice to come on here and have you lovely ladies to talk to

 

[choklatemunky]

Flossy I hope you are ok

 

[Kittykins]

Flossy - huge and lots of for you. I guess you must have said about the haematoma somewhere else so I don't know the details BUT if you have a haematoma then yes, it's very very likely that it will cause brown spotting - a possible haematoma was one of the reasons my doctor was considering for me still spotting/bleeding 2 weeks after the D&C. Do contact your midwife/doctor though, otherwise you'll be stressing about it. Hope you're ok.

ROM - I can imagine it can't have been easy for Hannah - I bet some passengers have been getting pretty angry about it all. Hope they've not been taking it out on her.


well, I'm feeling a bit better today. I did all the chores I had to do (teaching doesn't start till October, hurrah, but there were still loads of admin tasks, boooo) and then... went shopping. Well, I went to the library, returned a load of books and an empty bag just isn't right, is it girls?! So I had to go fill it... Jigsaw's sale was still on, and I found a lovely dress and a skirt. Best of all, they're quite generously sized and I fitted an 8. Ok, I know I'm really vain, but I had to go buy size 12 trousers a couple of weeks ago because nothing fitted, and it's so hard seeing yourself getting bigger and bigger when you know there's no baby... So at least buying my normal size made me feel like I was getting back to normal. The weight does seem to be coming off now - I've actually lost 4kg since Saturday, so only a kg or so more than I was before this all started. I guess most of it was fluids - blood and water - rather than fat as I'd feared. I didn't try any trousers on though, I definitely wouldn't have got my thighs into size 8s! Did anyone else find that their thighs ballooned the second they got a BFP or is that just me?!

Shopping wasn't everything though (gosh, I sound like I live for retail therapy...) - I also went to the Origins store in Covent Garden and booked myself in for a facial. I needed some cleanser anyway, and I prefer to use natural products, so this was a no-brainer. Just in case you don't know about it: £15 fee for a 45-minute facial, redeemable against any facial skincare (and the cleanser was £15!). Plus until 4 October (I think) buy any facial skincare and you get a giftpack of mini-sizes. So I went in for my cleanser, and came out an hour later feeling much more relaxed, with the cleanser and the minis, all for £15. Bargain... I think they do it at Origins counters in department stores too, but it'll probably tell you on the website if you're interested. A plus was that my skin really does look better. All the hormones have really screwed it up recently, but that facial has worked...


Origins really should pay me to do their marketing... but seriously, it was so worth it...

 

[reallyoldmum]

No Claire I have never spoken to him since - sad really as I classed him as a really close friend I did bump into his wife several times on the train into Birmingham whilst I was working there last year and it was interesting She had a moment when she recognised me but obviously couldnt remember where from (we didnt really know each other just met up at the Christmas do each year) she smiled said hello so I smiled back but after about 15 minutes of her watching me I saw the penny drop her face turned to and I was very glad when the train pulled into the station

Han has been more upset about the way her company has upped their prices so people have been really out of pocket to get home - she is really struggling with the ethics of the whole thing........ She has also been worried about the familes with young children that have spent all their money and have had to wait for hours to sort out flights in the boiling sun - she ended up buying one family a meal out of her own pocket!!!

Kitty shopping rocks I miss it so much - I'm huge and feel a mess in everything I put on so am getting no pleasure from retail therapy at the moment............. I so wish I was one of those women that just had a small little ball - no such luck I seem to be carrying this little one transverse at the moment so I have really lumpy sides too

Jane x

 

[Kittykins]

hey all. Well, I'm on an emotional rollercoaster. Yesterday was up, today is right at the bottom.

I went to the GP this morning for a f/u appt. After doing an internal exam, he sent me straight to the hospital. An ultrasound revealed... a sac-shaped dark object measuring 22x22x15mm (very similar size and shape to the empty gestational sac two weeks ago, the day before the D&C). The obstetrician said it might be the sac or it might just be a large blood clot. I asked about the (very) positive pregnancy tests and he said in that case there might be a little tissue mixed with the blood. He's not at all bothered, told me I could bleed for a few more weeks(!) and if the bleeding gets heavier or I'm worried, to come back in a fortnight's time when I'm back from holiday (we're due to leave 6am on Saturday...). The pathology results from 2 weeks ago still haven't come back so we don't know what they actually removed.

I rang my GP as arranged and he is VERY concerned. He said that the obvious assumption is that if it looks like a sac, bleeds like a sac and produces HCG like a sac, in the absence of evidence to the contrary, it's probably a sac. And if it's a sac, I shouldn't be going on holiday till it's dealt with. He is now ringing round trying to get hold of hospital consultants and lab reports - he's just rung to say that he can't get hold of anyone at present, so will call me later this afternoon as soon as they've called him back.

So I'm feeling really crap now. Please send me all the positive thoughts you can spare!

 

[choklatemunky]

OMG Kitty!
Thats horrendous!
Tons of hugs and positive thoughts coming your way RIGHT NOW from me!
Your poor love, and just when you were starting to feel a bit better about things too......I would say it was sods law but I think you have had more than your fair share of that and this is one step too bloody far!
I hope the stupid Hosp people get back to your GP asap....He does sound very much like he's on your side so I do hope he manages to get their arses in gear for you!

I just don't know what to say..........

 

[Loola]

Oh god kitty that is awful I hope you get some answers this afternoon, I cant believe the hospital arent taking this very seriously at all. Glad that your GP is more helpful though. So excuse me for being stupid but is this the original sac and obviously the D&C didnt do what it was supposed to? or was there another sac?

I am sending you all of my positive thoughts