Circumcision

[isobel84]

So im having a boy.. OH is a muslim. He want our boy to be circumctised. Its very important to him.
So im abit.. dont really know what to do. I did say to him when i first found out i was pregnant that i would be ok with it. But now when i know we are having a boy im scared.
Im not sure how it works and when i try to read about it i find the language too hard to understand (im not english)
I asked some girls at work and one said her boy had it done when he was a few weeks old, he was in discomfort for a few hours after and then he was ok.
The otherone, her son was 3 and put to sleep when they did and he never had any problems. The third girl said she cant belive im even considering it.
In Islam the boy need to have it done before puberty.

So what do i do.

Im so comfused.

 

[NicciLove]

Hi Hun,

I have no experience in this as my family are all women! But i didnt want to read and run.

I'm sure there are hundreds of pro's and con's to circumcision and i dont think there are any wrong or right choices, its how you feel about it more than anything, you have plenty of time to decide!
I had a friend who had it done as an adult as he believed it was cleaner, that was several weeks ago now and he's doing fine (aparently lol)
If my OH was religious and asked me to consider it, i would rather my son have it done at a young age as he is less likely to remember it, but thats just my opinion on it.

Are you not able to find any info online in your first language?

 

[MrsR]

I think the younger the child the easier it is for them though I could be completely wrong x in America it's very very common and almost second nature x I'll have a look see if I can find any info and try to put it into plain English x we won't be circumsising Seb but we're not Muslim or religious and my OH isn't circumcised x

 

[isobel84]

yeah i been looking but i think the information you get is rubbish to be honest. and alot is just personal views on it.
im not sure how it works in england and im not sure my midwife will be able to tell me i dont think they do it in NHS. Yeah sooner rather then later i guess..
OH have not brought this up with me yet (only when we first found out i was pregnant) But i want to be prepared and know alot about it before we talk about it or i think it will go his way very easely and that might not be the best way who knows..

 

[x_MrsE_x]

Where would you get it done ? my hubby had it done when he was little and has had no problems

 

[MrsR]

Ok here goes-circumcision is quite rare in the uk,it is the removal of the foreskin surgically. The nhs say that if the circumcision is for religious or cultural reasons it should be done privately (not on the nhs) and should be paid for by the parents. Alot of religious circumcision is performed without any anaesthetic (NOT recommended as it's a painful procedure) . The procedure can be performed with the prayers and rituals with a surgical team and anaesthetic present. I can't find any info on how it's done in the uk though x x hope I've been a bit of help x there's alot of pros and cons and many doctors don't like doing it over here unless there's a medical reason x

 

[Dragonfly Fi]

Okay, i have no experience of being circumsided as you know - however... having been with men who are and men who arent - well i properly would consider getting my wee lad done

sex with men with circumside willies are MUCH better shags than those without
they are so much cleaner/more hygienic - no 'hidden suprises' beneath the mushroomy bit

plus they go for longer coz they are desensitized

I think for hygiene reasons its well worth it and i also think for when the lad is older, get it done

 

[Dragonfly Fi]

Oh definatly give the lad some anethetic though! i would not be budged on that, we arent in the desert and someone cutting a bit off your willy is obviously going to hurt you regardless of the age...

 

[isobel84]

thanks helen X i think you have to go to Plastic Surgery, im not sure.
I havent met a person that have wished there forskin to be left ( i know quite a few men that is not muslims and have had it done) and i know in arabic contries and asia and america is very comon.
But then again.. If it was only up to me i wouldnt have it done to my boy.
Its a hard one.. Maybe i just need to talk to OH and see what he says..

 

[isobel84]

Oh definatly give the lad some anethetic though! i would not be budged on that, we arent in the desert and someone cutting a bit off your willy is obviously going to hurt you regardless of the age...

I must admitt i prefer it cut of aswell but i dont think thats a good enough excuse to do it to my boy so he can please the ladies
Yeah i know, this is why im thiking to wait to he is maybe 3-4 so he is out of nappies and they can put him to sleep (if they would i dont know, and also is it any danger for my boy to be put to sleep?)

My OH was 11, it was in The gambia, he was lucky to have it done in hospital but he told me they held him down and he saw it all and he screamed for his life.

 

[FebMum2Be]

It would be a lot different now I would say hun If your LO was to have it done he wouldn't feel anything if that was your wish..

I am not a Muslim, but I wouldn't have it done to my son, I would let him grow up and explain things to him and let him decide.. But of course I understand where your OH is coming from and respect that too x

 

[Dragonfly Fi]

Oh definatly give the lad some anethetic though! i would not be budged on that, we arent in the desert and someone cutting a bit off your willy is obviously going to hurt you regardless of the age...

I must admitt i prefer it cut of aswell but i dont think thats a good enough excuse to do it to my boy so he can please the ladies

I dunno, for my son if hes anything like his father he needs all the help he can get

sorry i dont mean it - i love my husband very much and his foreskinned willy
if it didnt cost loads of money i would make him get it lopped off though, so much more hygienic!

 

[MrsR]

I disagree big bump, sorry x I have been with circumcised and uncircumcised men and my OH is uncircumcised and is much cleaner than anyone else I've been with x it depends on the man IMHO x if you teach boys properly then they will be clean x

 

[isobel84]

Oh definatly give the lad some anethetic though! i would not be budged on that, we arent in the desert and someone cutting a bit off your willy is obviously going to hurt you regardless of the age...

I must admitt i prefer it cut of aswell but i dont think thats a good enough excuse to do it to my boy so he can please the ladies

I dunno, for my son if hes anything like his father he needs all the help he can get

sorry i dont mean it - i love my husband very much and his foreskinned willy
if it didnt cost loads of money i would make him get it lopped off though, so much more hygienic!

hahaha bless

 

[isobel84]

I disagree big bump, sorry x I have been with circumcised and uncircumcised men and my OH is uncircumcised and is much cleaner than anyone else I've been with x it depends on the man IMHO x if you teach boys properly then they will be clean x

i have not been with enough circumcised men to really make my voice heard but OH is far cleaner then men i been with before (they all had forskin)

 

[FebMum2Be]

My OH has foreskin and I have never found ANYTHING under his "mushroomy bit" I really do think it all has to do with the individuals personal hygiene x

 

[Dragonfly Fi]

no not just personal hygiene, its fairly self explainatory, if you have a piece of skin that stuff can get underneath, stuff will get underneath it - science really

 

[isobel84]

but if you wash properly everyday i think "forskin men" are just as clean as "none forskin men".
but i still prefer it whitout!

 

[Toonlass]

This can often be a touchy subject on these forums so firstly i will say that everyone should respect each others opinions

Personally i prefere a 'cut' man. My OH was cirumcised when he was 2 for medical reasons, as were most of the males in his family. My 2 sons will have to be circumcised as they have the same problem as OH. A teeny tiny hole to pee through and thats it! I agree it is cleaner as there is no area for dirt to collect under but i would NOT agree to a circumcision on any child of mine without good medical reason. It is an operation at the end of the day which carries risks and a degree of pain on the child.

What i am about to say is my opinion only and i am not judging anyone else but i don't understand why anyone would want to remove a part of a persons body for religious reasons. If you are religious you must believe in god, god gave men a foreskin, he wanted it that way, so why remove it?!? it puzzles me xx

 

[Mervs Mum]

I respect peoples right to decide for themselves/their children for religious reasons but as Toon said, unless there was a medical need I wouldnt have my sons done. There is absolutely no extra hygiene benefits if like any other 'flap of skin' it's looked after and kept clean. Sorry to be TMI but your vagina has 'flaps of skin' and we manage to keep them clean without resorting to cutting them off.

It's important to your husband as a muslim and I would respect that. Id just ask him to explain when and how it takes place. I know in the Jewish tradition it's on the 8th day when the child is named