AP programme

[beanie]

well thats great if you aint got insecurities stop assuming that if im slagging of extreme ap that im slagging of you, because im not!

I didn't assume that, please show me where I have said anything like that. I repeat I have not criticised you so please stop doing the same!

 

[Dee1985]

beanie i have not criticised you, so get it out of your head!

eg

It really annoys me that whenever they do a programme about "alternative" parenting practices they have to find the extremes who make everyone look weird

thats why i asked if you have insecurities? because you assume every one will think your wierd and like i keep saying i dont. so am i able to talk about these """EXTREME""" AP woman or are you going to get uptight about it!

 

[beanie]

the context of that statement is missing and like I expalined

I just wish that the media would show a balanced programme about AP, as I think that it would be interesting, and would have given me more info on AP. When I was struggling with the way I looked after Seren I personally would have found that helpful but a programme about the "freaks" doesn't.

No where have I said that people will think that I am,like that, I just wish that programmes like this would be more informative and less shock value.
and the reason why I said please don't criticise me is becaiuse of this

you both seem to have big insecurities??? why???

just because there is going to be a programe on about wierdos you assume every one is going to think it of you? is that what you want? is it for attention?

you dont no nothing out of the ordinary? i hold my children as often as possible and loads of normal mums breast feed and use reuseible nappies? so you dont need to feel like you are one of a kind.

whats the big problem?

I think that was unfair, I don't want attention, I don't think I am anything out of the ordinary.I didn't make this personal, you were the one who did. You attacked me (for want of a better word but I can't think of one sorry) I have not done that to you. That's why I ask you not to criticse me. I put this up for discussion of course you can discuss it, I never said you could. Thats what I wanted, people to discuss it.

 

[Dee1985]

you are so confussing if you find that an attack

i was saying to you straight you are no different get over it!
not every one i going to be talking about YOU after the show

 

[beanie]

We are going round in circles here. I have said what I have to say.

 

[nikki1306]

Does seren have a cot then beanie?,has she always co-slept with you,i would be scared of having a small baby in my bed cause my oh is a nightmare with the duvet and turning and i would be scared they would suffocate xx

 

[beanie]

She does now. Seren will satrt the night in her cot as she has fallen out of bed twice and I just don't want to risk it When she wakes up I will bring her into bed with me as I sleep one side and the wall is the other. She has co-slept since she was about 1 and a half weeks as I was falling asleep whilst feeding her anyway so discovered feeding lying down and haven't looked back. I tucked the corner of the duvet between my legs so it wouldn't go over her and made sure pillows were nowhere near.

 

[Dee1985]

i was considering co-sleeping. a couple of times i brought Harley into my bed when i was sooo tired but then i read up on it and from then on kept him in his pram. ild rather be safe then sorry

http://www.kidshealth.org/parent/genera ... eping.html

 

[nikki1306]

That's sweet beanie ,and it's good that she goes down in her cot first without the feeling of needing to be sleeping with you,she must be a very happy little girl,sounds like you are doing a great job hun xx

 

[nikki1306]

I am the same Dionne i would be so scared something would happen,i wriggle to much and so does OH xx

 

[beanie]

Thanks hun, that's really kind of you

I guess I have been lucky with her going to sleep well enough. Some nights she can be a bit of a horrer and I have to feed her to sleep but that's not so common now.

Co-sleeping is up to the individual, there are risks but if you read up on everything you can make your own mind up. Urchin once gave me a great link I will see if I can find it. I may be some time though as it was a while ago

 

[beanie]

found it

http://www.attachmentparenting.org/artb ... leep.shtml

 

[nikki1306]

Cheers hun xx

 

[nikki1306]

What age do you think you will stop or will you let seren decide ,they talk about a boy up to 5 years,when my 4 year old is poorly and she gets into bed with us it's a nightmare with all the kicking and moving,i feel terrible when i wake up xx

 

[beanie]

I think i will let Seren decide, they say that toddlers tend to go when they feel ready. However if at the age of 18 she is still bedding in may have to say something

 

[K X]

Doesn't AP to an extent make children far too dependent on their parents? I don't follow it, I am "mainstream", Rebecca has a travel system, is formula fed, and I would never co-sleep, my personal choices. I want Rebecca to be independent, as I fear that if for eg I carried her everywhere she would become too attached to me, and never want me to leave her. I couldnt have that, with me working and her having to go to nursery etc. Hats off to you tho Beanie, I couldnt carry 20lbs round everywhere with me, u must be fit!

It's a case of each to their own, there is no right or wrong in this apart from sh*gging ur OH when the kids are in their bed, but that is extreme!

 

[nikki1306]

I think i will let Seren decide, they say that toddlers tend to go when they feel ready. However if at the age of 18 she is still bedding in may have to say something

,especially when she isn't getting home till 3am xx

 

[beanie]

Doesn't AP to an extent make children far too dependent on their parents? I don't follow it, I am "mainstream", Rebecca has a travel system, is formula fed, and I would never co-sleep, my personal choices. I want Rebecca to be independent, as I fear that if for eg I carried her everywhere she would become too attached to me, and never want me to leave her. I couldnt have that, with me working and her having to go to nursery etc. Hats off to you tho Beanie, I couldnt carry 20lbs round everywhere with me, u must be fit!

It's a case of each to their own, there is no right or wrong in this apart from sh*gging ur OH when the kids are in their bed, but that is extreme!

Have quoted as this explains it better then I can lol

Some fear that attachment parenting will create dependent, clingy children. Attachment proponents claim the opposite is true: "Attached children may be dependent longer, but because the dependency phase is completely fulfilled, the child can grow into an independent, secure adult," Aldort says. Further, proponents argue that each developmental stage, such as toilet learning, or weaning from the breast or bed, will be naturally achieved when the child is ready, and not according to an arbitrary, culturally determined timetable.

from http://www.naturalchild.org/guest/jane_mcconnell.html

I am not into all the AP things, I don't think that this means I bond any better with my baby then you with yours, as you say we all do what we feel is best for us and our children. There is no wrong or right, but am definately with you on the shagging in front of children. That is not AP that is nasty

I am not fit at all, I have a great sling

here is more info about AP

http://www.askdrsears.com/html/10/t130300.asp

 

[Dee1985]

im defo getting a corrie fleece pouch im really excited!!!!
i want a botish one as il mainly use it for Harley but then think i might still use it for Dior??? she is pretty huge though????? if so i might get a unisex one?????

(but still buggy is my first option)

just Dior gets tired and i hate my double buggy

 

[Rosieroo]

you both seem to have big insecurities??? why???

just because there is going to be a programe on about wierdos you assume every one is going to think it of you? is that what you want? is it for attention?

you dont no nothing out of the ordinary? i hold my children as often as possible and loads of normal mums breast feed and use reuseible nappies? so you dont need to feel like you are one of a kind.

whats the big problem?

I don't see them doing a program about women who leave their kids in their car seats whilst their at home cos 'junior is more comfy in it'

and if my LO is more comfy in his car seat at home whats wrong wih that?? what SHOULD he be in?? shouldnt i just worry about my child being happy and not what looks best or makes me look a better mother?

and i think that you have a certain image of mothers. eg if a mother does controlled crying at 6weeks this then means the feed their child crap .
what exactly is feeding a child crap in your eyes? cause i dont no any mothers that do?

I don't feel like I am one of a kind. No I don't want attention, otherwise I am sure I'd be posting a load of other crap about my life if I did (maybe I shouldn't have posted about my grandad, don't want to be an attention seeker )
I was giving examples of different types of parenting techniques with the 6 week controlled crying etc. And I know plenty of mothers that feed their children unsuitable foods for a baby i.e. chips, ice-cream and what I consider to be shit food to give to an under 6 month old (don't think I am talking about forum users and have another barney at me, I do other stuff outside of the forum).
My big problem is that whenever there are programmes on about breastfeeders or in this case AP types they always ridicule the people on them and make them look stupid. It's like a freak show programme. I don't have any insecurities, just peed off that I will be defending certain choices I have made with my parenting AGAIN.
Dionne my problem with people leaving their kids in their car seat is nothing to do with what looks good, it's for the childs health. It's not healthy for a child to be left in them for long periods and can cause issues such as flat head syndrome (by saying that I'm not having a go at you, just letting you know if you didn't already that car seats are not great for babies to be left in for long periods). But then that's just my opinion (which always seems to cause controversy ).


Personally I am sorry if I offended anyone with my post, but I felt your response was aggressive too Dionne. I'm pleased you're looking forward to getting your coorie though, it's a life saver (and arm saver) for me.
Thank you Hypnorm, I knew you didn't mean anything

I'm too tired to argue. Here is my response, tear it apart as you must.