Who's your birth partner and how do you think they will cope

[Noor~ul~Usman]

I don't have one and I don't have a clue who I would want

My mum was usless when I went to hospital for my D&C. She couldn't stand to see me in so much pain (m/c whilst in hospital waiting for D&C ) and instead of calling the midwife for pain relief or anything she sat right in the corner reading and book and zoned herself out. You could tell from her face she was distressed rather than just not caring bless her but it mad me so mad and dissapointed

My husband already said he doesn't want to be there for the birth but is happy to be there straight afterwards. I think he's now decided he'd like to be in the hospital when I go in but that he'll leave the room during the delivery
I'm not sure I'd want him there anyway because I don't know that I'd ever be able to get it out of my mind that he'd seen me at what will possibly be my most 'undesireable moment'

My best friend I would have liked to be my birth partner and she has already offered but realistically speaking she works 6-7 days a week out of town and has no transport so she can't get to me in a rush - if she's even allowed to leave work

 

[Becky]

Mine is my OH. He did really well last time even though there wasn't a lot for him to do! Last time I didn't like much interaction and coped much better when just left to get on with it, although he did make sure I had a drink when I needed it. In the end it was a section and he did really well considering he doesn't like blood etc. but sat with me and held my hand.

I did wonder about having my mum there as we're really close and I know she'd handle it all well (she used to be a theatre nurse!) but I liked it last time when it was just me and OH.

Plus, he doesn't have to do anything to support me, just being there with me is enough.

 

[aramintalovegrove]

Well I'm having my OH and....

A doula!

Wow you lucky lady!!

I don't have one and I don't have a clue who I would want
My husband already said he doesn't want to be there for the birth but is happy to be there straight afterwards.

I'm not sure I'd want him there anyway because I don't know that I'd ever be able to get it out of my mind that he'd seen me at what will possibly be my most 'undesireable moment'

Oh I hope your friend gets to make it for you!

My OH tried the get out clause but was TOLD he would be there!!! He actually admits he found me very ehem arousing when giving birth last time as I was suffering so much for him and his child

TBH I dont think I would have notice if no one was there with me last time i was too delerious.

 

[Neev]

Mine is my DH. Could not think of anyone else to be there...he has uttered a couple of times he is very scared/squeamish but am hoping he will get very strong during labour. I would not want him to see the gory bits down there but he is prepared to calm me down, rub my back, do whatever it takes to take my mind off things....he is prepared but has apologised in advanced for fainting/passing out/puking and crapping himself.

One thing I am worried about and have told him several times is not to shout at any of the Midwives..I can just picture him panicking watching me in pain and his reflex being - WHY IS MY DW SCREAMING!!! ahem hello... but he has promised he will not raise his voice no matter how scared he is...

lets see - otherwise I will be so embarassed..I know poor thing is only scared and trying to help but I have this vision of a hitler MW telling me to keep quiet because the other ladies are trying to sleep!!

 

[MissyRee]

Mine is my OH and my mum, i got a free dvd the other day and a girl was giving birth in abit of it so i thought id show my OH so he could kind of see what i could be like in labour.. i think its fair to say he was shocked at the noises and pain lol, he said he doesnt know how he'll cope seeing me in pain and hadnt really thought about that part of it all.. bless him at least he now knows what to be prepared for!! Although i think he'll do better than he thinks he will

I think my mum will be great too as shes always been a real support so i think she'll be keeping me and my OH happy and calm throughout. x

 

[elliej]

mine is my OH, whether he likes it or not! well, he was there at the begginning so he can damn well be there at the end! lol. i think he will be fine, although i think he will spend most of the time down there getting in the way and asking stupid questions like ' whats that do?' and 'why does it look like that?'. unfortunatly im sure he has a strange fascination with that region, which is probably why im in this mess in the first place.......................
think i can trust him not to faint or whatnot, although he will crack some stupid jokes no doubt!
someone asked me yesterday whether i will shout obscenities in French or English, what do you reckon? i suppose i can do worse ones in English as less people will understand...........

 

[nori]

Mine is my OH but im thinking i may need a back up incase he faints! I mentioned having a birthing pool if i can (at the hospital) and he said it will be like a blood bath and maybe not a great idea. I had to remind him that i was the one going through labour and im sure he will cope. He is ridiculously sqeamish and has a very weak stomach.

Claire x

 

[sparky]

just to point out my dh is very squimish...but i couldnt keep him away from the business end he was completley facinated and said it was the most amazing thing ever, he totally enjoyed the whole experiance

 

[hanti-boo]

DH, Ian for me!

He was there for Nichola and kept having a look down the business end but decided to stay up with me once they discovered Nichola's cord had slightly torn.
He was really good too.

Nichola wants to come too. I took her with me this morning to have my check over and second sweep and she was facinated. She started sulking on the way home too cos baby was still in my tummy!! Bless

 

[Hazel]

Mine was my DH and I can honestly say I couldn't have done it without him. He's usually a bit crap at taking charge and panics but he was very organised. Was very calm and talked me through each contraction and was genuinely wonderful.

My mum joked he would make a good midwife

 

[Jimmer]

Who is the birth partner? Me!!! Oh, and my wife's sister - she has two children and had really positive experiences both times, so that will help.

And how will I cope? I have no idea - it will be an unforgettable experience, and all I can do is be as supportive and take as much worry away from her as possible.

I dont think anyone knows how they will cope - but I will do what I can!!!

Jimmer

 

[Spritzer]

my OH is my Birthing partner - i have no idea how he will be, i have a feeling hes going to be really good though, but i'm always the one in control/organising things so swapping roles will be weird, lol.

my mum wanted to be my birthing partner and hospital would of allowed her to be but I really dont wat her telling me how to do it, shes dont it 5 times and been pregnant 7 times so im sure she knows what shes doing, but we would just end up fighting!!

 

[Strangeness]

I had my dh and I didn't know what he'd be like when it came to giving birth vaginally as I had a c section with my ds. He was amazing and I couldn't have asked for a more supportive birth partner!

 

[JoAnn&Aimee]

I had my OH Ewan and my mum with me but when it came to pushing I wanted it to be just Ewan and I so my mum went to the waiting room. I actually never thought about how they would cope during it. Ewan nearly fainted when they broke my waters so he was classed as a 'faint risk' by the midwifes. When I got my epidural he was asked to leave incase he fainted and my mum stayed. However she nearly fainted as I was holding onto her so hard during a contraction while getting the epidural. When I had to get the tube refitted due to a kink, she had to leave the room. I lost both my birth partners but gained 4 midwifes for 5 minutes!

 

[Ally1979]

My OH will be mine. I cant remember if he was good or not last time as i was asleep through most of it and really dont have much memory of birth which is probably a good thing.

He is Mr cool and calm and practical and will prefer to stay at the head end lol. I do remember the MW asking him if he wanted to see the head coming out and he went slightly pale and said "Erm no its ok ta" lol bless him.
The MW also thought it was funny because i kept saying how gorgeous he was and wasnt he wonderful and how much i loved him lol!!