So depressed....

[cristie_gce]

Hi all! I guess I am needing to cry out for a minute. My sister-in-law and I have been best friends and then I married her brother! She got married one month before I did and guess who is preggo! (I have been ttc for 10 mos) and she found out yesterday! I am happy for her, but a tad envious! Maybe since she got married one month before me she is preggo one month before me. Man, I sure hope so. I will be so hard watching her belly grow and all the baby preparations. I hope that I catch up in time to share the experience. I really have to learn to relax like her and just let it happen!! I am taking comfort in knowing that she has never had a "female" problem in her life and it took her 11 mos of unprotected newlywed sex to get pg. Maybe there is hope for this PCOS patient.

 

[Sal]

Hi Cristie
cry out all you need. I got my period this morning so have cried on and off all day. My poor husband really doesn't know what to do or say, I guess there is nothing he can do or say that would make me feel any better. My sister is going in for an c section tomorrow morning, it's her first baby and the little tinker has turned breech hence the section. we are all so excited and I can't wait to leave work tomorrow and go and cuddle my gorgeous niece or nephew but I'm sure this has contributed to my feeling so depressed.
I never knew trying for a baby would be so hard. I thought it'd be a couple of months of continuous sex and then bob's your uncle we'd be having a baby!
Keep your chin up darl, you'll get there.
x

 

[cristie_gce]

Sal, Thank you for that! I needed it! Everyone keeps telling me to stop thinking about it and it will happen! Is that easier said than done or what!?? Good luck and baby dust to you!

 

[Lindsay]

Hello

I don't know whether you have read any of my previous messages. I have been ttc since July and it just hasn't happened for me, but it has happened for 2 people I work with, one of my friends, my cousin and my Dh cousin so all in all I feel really fed up with things!!!! I have tried 'not thinking about it' and have tried to relax but it is so hard, especially when all you want is to get PG.

Am sending you hugs and baby dust ....... we will get our turn one day!

 

[cristie_gce]

Thanks for the replies. I am managing to be really happy for my sister-in-law. I don't think it will get to me until she starts bringing the ultrasounds around or when the baby showers start. Hopefully I'll be caught by then. I am mad at myself for letting her pregnancy make me feel like I have to get pg URGENT! I don't want that feeling to make the BD just for a baby...ya know? I think my DH is feeling that way....ughhh! I believe our day will come also. My mom told me that she had already given up and thought she was barren at 9 mos of trying and boom..now there are 5 of us. I just have to be positive.

 

[Impatience]

Same here - my sister in law just had a baby girl on the 18th May - the night my brother in law phoned to say she was in labour, I cried like a baby!

I was hoping that I would at get a bfp b4 it was due so that I didn't feel so bad - but I had AF just at the time she was being born!

I still went to see her when she was 6 days old and loved holding her etc and don't feel as bad about not getting a bfp now! still want a baby more than ever though! lol

two ladies just left work on maternity leave yesterday too, and my cousins wife is preg and my other cousins girlfriend is preg.

Guess we are always surrounded by preg ladies, but don't really think anything of it until we want one ourselves - then get jelous.

I too felt bad for feeling jelous, but just think - when we are all pregnant - think of all the ladies who see our bumps and get jelous - they'll feel exactly the same!

Angela

 

[Lisa J]

hey ladies
i have come over to see how it is all going, i keep my fingers crossed for you all the time, if all these people are falling just keep sitting in there seat coz it must be catching! lol.
keep up all you baby dancing and baby dust to you all
xxxxxxxxx

 

[s]

Cristie,
It's completely natural how you feel and you're bound to be feeling a little low. You shouldn't be so hard on yourself. I don't think anyone who isn't in our position can understand how it feels when you see the first few spots of red. It's really deflating but things happen for a reason and our day will come soon. You'll feel more positive in a day or so.
S

 

[Lisa J]

i just want to say sorry if i offended any of you.
especially if the last post was aimed at me
baby dust

 

[moonpiesb]

Hello ladies....I have been keeping up with this thread, but have just now decided to add my feelings. TTC has got to be the MOST frustrating thing I have ever done. My niece just had ANOTHER child on May 20....don't get me wrong; I am thrilled for her, but I am green with envy as well. A boy (I call him that because he is much younger than I am....23) that I work with and his wife are expecting there 2nd and 3rd (they just found out yesterday that she is having twins). ARGH!!!!!!!!!! I want to sream, pull my hair out, and spew green venom all over the place. I look back to all the years I tried not to conceive, all the prayers for God to please let AF come so that "my life would not be ruined" by an unwanted pregnacy. How could I have ever thought that a baby would ruin my life? I look around me and see all the young, un-wed mothers and somehow they make it. I am not so young any more, but am still un-wed. I have a good job, and a very supportive family. Now that I want to get pg, I can't for the life of me! Is this God's way of punishing me? Is God just not letting me have a child because in the past I prayed every time AF was late that he would not let me be pg? Believe me I have prayed many prayers lately that instead of getting AF that I would get my BFP! He must think I am nuts, and can't make up my mind. Praying not to get a BFP and now praying to get a BFP. And besides just having to see all the pg people around me, when they start to complain about how horrible they feel I want to slap the taste out of their mouth. How do people have the gall to complain about being pg to me when they know how hard I am trying to get pg? They do it on accident, and I go to great lengths. BOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HISS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And then people tell me to relax and it will happen when you least expect it. Yeah right. Relax my arse!! How will it happen when I am expecting it every four weeks? Sorry to whine and complain, but I woke up feeling sorry for myself (not sure exactly why), I am at work, and everything is going terrible here today, so I just thought I would vent.
I hope everyone is having a good weekend. Have fun BDing if you are Oing. Good luck testing if your TTW is over. And if you not waiting to test or O, I wish you a very relaxing, breath taking weekend.



BABY DUST TO US ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Sal]

Hey chick, sounds like you've had a really crap day, you ok? I think these forums are great to be able to come on and vent all our anger/frustration/tears and we all know exactly how each other are feeling.
Keep your chin up (or pelvis - whichever most useful!)
x

 

[cristie_gce]

Thank you all so much for reminding me that I am not the only one. Just for the record...everyone that ttc and had success, I have NO anger towards you at all. Although, I'll admitt that YES at times I am envious, but in my heart there is only congratulations. Also, keep telling us your tricks! Moonpies: I am not trying to get religious on you, but our God is full of grace and we have to trust that He does everything for our good. His timing isn't like our own, but nevertheless; it is perfect. (Okay, climbing down off of my soapbox, sorry if anyone was offended, I meant only to encourage). I have officially entered my tww and already I don't think I am pg. You know why?? B/C I didn't feel the butterflies that so many pg women say that they felt! Isn't that a stupid reason to get down. I really have to shake myself and remember that I am young and hopefully a babymaking machine! Thanks again!!

 

[moonpiesb]

I guess I should start by saying that I am really not a pscyho....I just read my last post and I sound like a total lunatic. I was having a horrible day and just felt like venting.

I also have no ill feelings for the people who get a BFP; I am very happy for them, but envious as well. I remind myself that pregnancy causes hormones to go crazy and that the people who complain while pregnant probably do feel miserable at times. Their bodies must be doing things that don't feel normal......can't wait to feel those abnormal things myself. I will probably be on of those miserable pregnant people, because I have no patience for them now. But I see myself as the happiest pregnant person to ever walk the face of the earth.

I know that God has his timing down pat, and I know that I shouldn't rush things....but the imperfect human side of me wants what I want, and I want it now (actually a few months ago would have been better). I am praying for a healthy pregnancy/baby and I believe that it hasn't happened yet because it just isn't the right time/egg for this to happen. And I have to admit that getting a BFN is much better that getting a BFP and then having a mc. So that keeps me thinking positive most of the time.

I will being doing my IUI this week, and my nerves are all over the place. I am trying to relax like everyone says, but am finding it to be my "Mission Impossible".

What butterfly feeling do pregnant people feel? The movement or the excitement? I am trying to learn all about the symptoms/feelings of pregnancy. Keep your chin up, and good luck.


BABY DUST TO US ALL!!!!!!!!!

 

[cristie_gce]

Wow! Sounds like your day took a U-turn! I have just heard many women say "I knew the very moment I concieved b/c I had butterflies in my stomach." I know that is actually impossible, but still....I want those butterflies! Good luck with your IUI. I have a single guy friend who is really successful (filthy rich) and attractive, in church, talented and he wants children. I am trying to get him to adopt. At least as women, we can do something about it! lol

 

[Kerry]

Moonpiesb,

You are not a lunatic and I for one thought your last post was great, full of emotion and feeling - you summed up what so many of us feel - this should be a place where you can have a good rant around people in your same situation.

Well done you for saying EXACTLY how you felt, and I know that the rest of us aren't a million miles behind you!!

Lots of love and baby dust and tonnes of luck with your IUI this week and keep us all posted.

Have you tried taking rescue remedy for the days leading up to it??

Lots of love

 

[moonpiesb]

Cristie, where is this single man located....send him my way!!!! I don't need a man who can support me, just one who can support himself; so the money isn't all that important, but the talented, in church, and wanting children a a HUGE plus for me.....the attractive part sounds good too. lol

Kerry, what is rescue remedy????????? I have never heard of it, but I will go get some if it will help. I have been taking Robitussin, burning blue candles and all sorts of things, but I have never heard of rescue remedy. What does it do and where can I get it?


BABY DUST TO US ALL!!!!!!!!

 

[cristie_gce]

Moonpies, Don't you feel the sudden need for a vacation to Batesville, Arkansas, US?? lol This guy works with computers and he is in charge of all the sound, projection and all that jazz with our church. He is 32 I think. Never been married. I could sell him on E-bay! haha

 

[moonpiesb]

I LIVE IN SW ARKANSAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! When you decide to put him on ebay let me know and I will put a bid on him.

 

[Kerry]

Rescue remedy is fab

See this for details:

http://www.rescueremedy.co.uk/2005/rr4.html

You must be able to get it in the US.........if not I have a few bottles here as I use bach flower remedies a lot. If you get stuck PM me your address and I will send you a bottle.......may not get it to you for this time but its great for any kind of stress, anxiety etc.

Let me know honey!!!

 

[Lindsay]

I definately agree with you Kerry, rescue remedy is fantastic. I have bottles and the cream in my cupboard for those stressful days!!!

Xxx