Our little dream :) Had a mc???

[JJ Mum]

Hello ladies, I just wanted to say hello and send you my thoughts for all your losses X

I had a missed MC march 2010, it was all a right mess, went to A&E and had blood transfusions and then the D&C anyway and was gutted. You are apparently really fertile and primed for pregnancy after a MC, so should help with TTC when your ready.

Bliss - We also tried again without waiting, and had so many pregnancy symptoms when period was due, I think it can be like that when your body starts ovulating again, as not everyone ovulates that first cycle before AF arrives. I hope that's not the case for you and I have everything crosssed for you for a BFP. Remember your next cycle may be longer than before, I ovulated late and sok nearly missed the fertile window as we had given up trying then, until we saw more signs ofk late ovulation and tried again.

Don't forget ladies (esp Bliss) if it happened once it can happen again, and I was 37 when I then went on to have a lovely baby boy after my MC, so an older mum.

Hope81, I really love your name choices for your future baby

Dysco - you will never forget , but it will get easier to handle and talk about, and work through in your mind. I started feeling much better once I decided to try again, it gave me something to work towards.

Good luck with all your lovely weddings, just keep open minds on the wedding dress's incase of expansions !!! You can get some lovely dress's that will hide and flatter all sorts nowadays girls.

Wishing you all the best luck in the world for TTC and I will be following all your progress on PF X

 

[Bliss]

Hi JJ and thanks for the info. I did wonder if perhaps these were period symptoms that I'd just never really noticed before (I think you become hyper aware of your body and changes when you're pregnant!)

Update - cheapo Morrisons test tonight said negative. I was disappointed for about a nano second then kind of relieved as I'm really not ready for any more shocks just now (aside from the fact I'm off to Orlando in 7 weeks and didnt really relish the idea of not being able to go on the rides at the theme parks )

 

[kanga86]

Enjoy ur trip to Orlando bliss, I'm so jealous

Our bodies really like to mess around with us don't they? Just went u want everything to be simple xx

 

[MrsDraven]

Hugs to all you guys. xx. Hey Hope, I had an MC a few weeks back as posted on here. They didn't require a D&C but told me to wait it out and it drove me insane waiting for the bleeding to stop. Finally has but now I'm having to deal with not going out to a certain place to avoid people because my fiance told a lot of people and now doesn't for some reason want us explaining to them what happened, so I get stuck with congratulations when I have no baby to be congratulated with. Frustrating but nothing I can do really. Waiting now for everything to get back to normal. Did plan trying again but now I'm not to sure I want to so I might just go on BC again. It's confusing as hell cause I can't make my mind up, coupled with past eating disorder that generally begins with past known depression then it's not making for decent mental health. If I could talk to someone about it I would but I gave up with counsellors a long time ago and my fiance doesn't really seem to want to know so I'm stuck I guess.
Oooh well, I'm sure I'll adjust eventually.

 

[Bliss]

MrsDraven, sorry, but I think your fiance is being completely unreasonable. Can't you (or him) speak to someone you know who also goes to this place and ask them to explain to everyone else what has happened? I'm really struggling to work out his thought process in leaving everyone in the dark. Yeah, its an upsetting thing to have to tell anyone, but whats a couple of seconds of awkwardness explaining...compared to potentially months of people asking about the pregnancy.

I was in a situation where pretty much everyone knew. Personally, I found it hard at first speaking to people about the miscarriage but in hindsight, I think it helped me deal with it. The only 'hiccup' I had was when a girl from another department at work came to say she was so sorry to hear what had happened..then promptly burst into tears, which obviously set me off (I've worked with her for about 15 years and she knew i'd been through IVF etc in the past).

 

[MrsDraven]

Tried talking to him numerous times and all I generally get is he's not ready to tell them yet. Fair enough it's hard for him too but til he seems ready to deal with it I'm stuck avoiding everywhere. But then again I'd be stuck with the sympathetic sorries and sadly from the majority of the people in that place, about 2 would be genuine the rest would be the fakest sympathy known to man. Not sure which is worse.

 

[Bliss]

When I called in to work to let them know I was coming back, I told my boss I just wanted people to be normal with me. I wont lie, the first 2 days weren't easy, I felt like people were walking on eggshells around me. The only time it got to me was my first day back, when one of the girls who had a baby the week before came in to visit. I guess they decided it was best if she didnt bring the baby in to the office that i worked in. Whilst I can understand the thinking behind doing that, it upset me more them doing that than it would have seeing the girl with her baby. I broke down for a bit and when my boss came out to see how I was I explained him doing that had made me feel awkward.

I could also see that another girl who had announced her pregnancy when I was off was feeling a bit uneasy when she came into the office, so I went out my way to congratulate her, ask how she was, when she was due etc.

Only you can decide what works, for BOTH of you, not just for him.

 

[MrsDraven]

Yeah. I'm gonna have to have another talk with him I think it's driving me mad.

 

[dyscochick]

MrsDraven, this is tough enough for both of you without misunderstandings from people who don't know and those people will feel terrible if happen to see you and don't know about it. Its tough but actually people knowing can be supportive to a degree, so long as they don't go on about it! If one more person says to me, 'well on the bright side at least you know you can get pregnant', I might throttle them!

Hope I really hope you had a lovely evening, although having seen the events in Norway this weekend I bet it was not the quiet night you were hoping for.

Bliss, I bought a load of cheapy hpts on the internet, Amazon, and have done several since the mmc just to see my hcg levels go down, so that if I get pregnant again I know its real, not my hormones still up after the mmc. Docs can measure and see if you are worried, but I hope it works out they way you want. I really want to try again immediately but as I've said above will try and wait til after xmas so I've only got a little bump at most on the day.

Kanga its good to see you here, I've been keeping a very low profile in the other areas too, so tempting to see how they are doing but it hurts to see them getting on so well, when I should have been there.

Cupcake I'm sure your mum is looking down in you, some things as you say, are beyond anythings control and you have your fiancee, I'm now throwing myself into wedding plans, as a distraction its perfect

 

[Hope81]

our weekend wasnt us planned because of the recent events here in Norway. we are quite far from where it happened but we couldnt just continue liek nth happened when so lives are gone
R.I.P....

dysco cant wait to hear about your wedding plans

 

[MrsDraven]

Thank you Dyscochick x

 

[Hope81]

how are you all doing today?
second day of AF today and everything looks normal as before.hopefully thats the end of my messed up hormones..
i hope i will hear great new from all of you, me oh so lazy i was today, i could barely get out of bed so nth really to report. i am stack in front of my pc trying to study but thats not going so good. also the nice weather outside dosent really help lol. Here i am in Norway wishing to be cloudy lol. Be careful of what you wish lol....

 

[Hope81]

oh and Kanga? how are you today? Did that bleeding finally stop?

 

[kanga86]

No I'm still bleeding on and off, going from brown when I wipe to random small gushes of red (tmi). Really unsure what to think. Wednesday afternoon can't come round quick enough

I had a lazy morning followed by a mad dash around to tidy, do some washing, polish etc before coming in to work. Don't want to get moaned at my my oh for being totally lazy! Lol

Hoping to apply for a new job, I currently am a cleaner at a leisure centre with horrible hours ( finish at 9pm some nights and start at 4.30am others) horrible shift work!! You g to apply to be a small van delivery driver as I will have more hours a week, more money to save for a LO and more time with oh as working the same hours! Wish me luck! Xx

 

[Hope81]

you should get an ultrasound soon to check that. i hope you will fell better son. i know all about working at horrible hours....

 

[kanga86]

That's what wed afternoon appt is for, got to wait til 3pm! Going to be along day!! Xx

 

[dyscochick]

hope scan goes OK kanga, must be so frustrating with the bleeding ongoing.
Really wanted a lazy day today and was productive but not at work, spent the day procrastinating and wedding planning
Venue is booked, registrar is booked, quotes for caterers, bands and photographers on their way. Problem with distracting myself from MC is that I'm likely to spend a small fortune on wedding when its supposed to be small and inexpensive! We aren't haveing a sit down do, BBQ and hog roast in a gorgeous barn venue in the brecon beacons so excited

 

[k8_005]

i lost our baby last oct/nov because of aneacaphaly, i am lucky enough to be back in tri 1 at moment hopefully with a more positive outcome, but i just wanted to send my love and hope for you all, things are horrible when they happen and you dont forget but it does with time become easier praying for you all to have lots of support and love your way at such a difficult time xxxx

 

[kanga86]

wow dysco u are getting really organised with ur wedding!! Sounds amazing! xx

I do really want this to be over soon, although I am not feeling sad about the mc now, kinda going through a numb phase! Probably doesn't help that my great grandad passed away on friday, at the ripe old age of 102! Don't think I am going to the funeral though, not sure I could handle it mentally and emotionally. xx

 

[Hope81]

love hearing wedding plans sounds so exciting dysco

k8 i hope everything will go perfect with you this time

kanga so sorry for your grandad 102 sounds amazing lol. i would advice you to go to the funeral even if its for only several minutes as you may feel sorry after that that you didnt. i ams till sorry that i missed my grandmas funeral as i wasnt in country

I am not feeling sad about the mc either and oh attitude was a great help. he keeps refering to our LO and making plans and look around at the supermarket for baby gear prices etc, acting as we are still expecting a baby in 9 months lol. i am looking forward for my AF to finish and everything to go back to normal. i never had a 2WW as first time was quite unplanned so i am kind exciting to maybe go through that. we are just not preventing for the follow months so no obsessing about if it will happen or not.

a rainy day here today, and 13 degrees, perfect for studying i would say so back to my books i go. i am so not looking forward for my vacation to finish lol even if i am spending most of my time studying instead of a beach. i like being lazy around the house instead of working