MMC - Options?

[Juice]

Today we went for our 12 week scan and were told that our baby didn't have a heartbeat and stopped growing at 8 weeks.

Now we have the dilemma of choosing which option to take.
We can let nature take it's course, have medication to start the miscarriage process or have a surgical procedure to remove the contents of my uterus.

I was just wondering of anyone else has been in this situation and what you decided to do?

Each option has it's pros and cons, and we're really struggling to make a decision.

Does anyone have any experiences they could share which may help?

Thanks in advance.

 

[jojo3972]

i had medical managed forst mmc last may it didnt work for me all i got was a lot of pain and lots of blood and clots and i had to have a erpc in the end,next one that i had in may i was 10 weeks baby stopped at 8 weeks also i went straight for the erpc i just wanted it over with my body just does not like letting go of a pregnancy that has ended and i needed closure asap, realy sorry for ur loss its such a hard decision but for me the erpc was so much easier and minimal bleeding the second time of 1 day but first time i bled for 2 weeks on and off goes to show it can difer all the time , hope u are oka nd make the right decision for u and ur oh xx

 

[NatEvz]

I chose and erpc but to cut a very long story short, the surgeon said she would prefer me to have the medical management. It was the worst experience of my life and one i will never repeat. It didnt work fully and it took 2 months for my womb to be clear. If my periods hadnt cleared the remaining products they said i might need surgery anyway. I would 100% chose the erpc. My body wouldnt let go naturally either. Im so so sorry for your loss honey xxx

My piece of shit galaxy ace

 

[mumsy4]

I am so sorry to hear this sad news sending lots of love your way.
I had a miscarriage which ended with a dnc, I started to miscarry the pregnancy a few times, I was told after going for a scan it was all out, but they were wrong. For me the dnc was a relief, no more pain or fear everytime I went to the toilet. It meant it was over and I could start to heal and move forward.
Thinking of you and oh xx

Sent from my GT-I9300 using Tapatalk 2

 

[smac]

oh, I'm so sorry that you are having to make this decision.
I had a d&c with my first, nov 2010, i had a medically managed one with my second- Feb 2012 and I'm at present miscarrying for the third time and I'm waiting to see, as I'm bleeding really heavily i am hopeful that nature will take its own course.
the reasons i made my decisions,
first one i thought it would be quick and easy and over and done with- to be honest we hadn't been ttc, my dd2 was 8 months old and when i found out i was pg, i was stressed. you see "i can't get pregnant!!!!, i needed clomid with dd1, and dd2 and years of trying for dd1. so no way did i think i would fall pg naturally and whilst breastfeeding. i had a coil fitted at same time as d&c- BIG MISTAKE.
second time i really didn't fancy another GA- not that i had a bad experience i just felt that it was too big a risk, also they were talking about a laparoscopy at same time and i definitely didn't fancy that. so one injection of methotrexate and 3 weeks later i was no longer pregnant.
this time i really hope my body does it all itself.
good luck with your decision- its not a nice place to be.
i wish you all the best.

 

[smac]

sorry that was wrong-
i had the d&c because my body didn't expel everything properly and i was rushed into hospital by ambulance after collapsing!
i can't believe i forgot that- i must still have pregnancy hormone circulating about at the moment,
medically managing it means you have to wait to tic again

 

[Happyfeet]

Again, I'm so sorry for your loss, I just can't tell you how sad I am for you and your OH.

I've only ever had natural miscarriages so have no idea what a d&c feels like, but I do know that I would chose that option if I was faced with this situation again during the second half of tri 1.

I had a blighted ovum last year, it started to come away at 10/11 weeks and it was truly an awful and very painful experience. I couldn't control the bleeding with three maternity pads in my knickers at once, I ended up sleeping with two folded bath sheets between my legs and had to walk with them to the loo (helped by my Husband as I couldn't walk on my own) in the morning. Everytime I sat on the loo, the blood was literally pouring out of me and I had to push the clots out. I passed out on the bathroom floor from the blood loss.

This lasted for a week or just over. I then got a horrible infection which landed me in hospital, hooked up to monitors and drips.

My experience was pretty bad, but I'm sure they aren't all like that. I'm sure you'll make the right choice for you

 

[Sunshine_1]

Hun, firstly I would like to say how very sorry I am to hear about your loss and how I would like to send you a huge hug

I had a natural MC, it started by itself and passed with the help of a little medication. Should I ever be in your position though and reading what I have on here and in other places and talking to people, I would go for the DC. It is so easy not to pass everything when you do it medically or naturally, and so you end up with what can be horrendous bleeding and still need the D&C. The bleeding means I am still struggling a little now, a month later, because my Iron levels are so low.

It's up to you, I was terrified of a D&C, having never had any form of operation before in my life, and so things like that, only you know, and can take in to consideration. Hope it passes OK for you though, and things go OK for you. I'll keep you in my thoughts

 

[lizsamuel80]

I'm so sorry to hear this. I knew with my last 2 something was up too. Remember you are not alone many people have gone through this and it is the harshest of realities. Remember to rest and cry when you need too. Sending you lots of virtual !!!!!!!

Both my MCs were Natural. My doc is not fond of medical intervention when it comes to MCs but he said if I really wanted one make sure I go to the leading Maternity hospital in our state. He would do what ever he could to get me in there if it was a route I wanted to take. He was really persistent about that. I decided after that recommendation that I would do natural again and passed the baby with in 48hrs of finding out.

 

[laurat]

Im so sorry for your loss honey!!! I had a natural mc but was only 7 weeks gone. Whatever you do make your you take care of yourself and your oh!!! Xxxx

 

[alibaby]

I am really sorry to hear about this. I had a missed mc in December and was also faced with making a choice from the 3 options. I decided to go with the medical management as didn't want an op and felt that I didn't want to just wait for nature to take it's course as was worried it could just happend at any time and that to me seemed quite scary. If I had to make the same decision again I would go for for the ERPC. The medical management was effective for me but I was in hospital for a whole day and it was extremely painful and the tablets made me feel awful, really nauseous and faint. I also bled (very lightly) for about 6-8 weeks. I dont know if it would have been any shorter with ERPC but because of this it felt like we couldn't start ttc again for ages.
I hope you get on ok with whatever decision you make. x

 

[H16]

I am so so sorry for your loss hun *hugs*

I found out at 11 weeks that my baby had stopped growing at 8 weeks. I decided on the surgically managed route as I felt a natural miscarriage might be a lengthy process considering it took my body 3 weeks to even recognise the baby had died.

I had to wait four days for my surgery and during that time I had a lot of blood loss, clots and extremely painful cramps which got so bad the night before my surgery I was laid on the bathroom floor for an hour at 1am

I'm glad I went down the surgical route as not only did it save me from having to possibly see my baby it also saved me from more extremely painful cramps. I also felt I wouldn't be able to properly start to grieve until the baby was out of my body and having a timeframe for that made me feel better.

After my d&c I bled for 3 weeks, normal period kind of flow and experienced some period type cramping which I assume was everything shrinking back to normal size.

Hope this helped.

Whatever you decide to do just make sure you look after yourself xx

 

[Sue Clare]

So sorry to hear of your mmc. I had a mmc in 2005 and I chose to let nature take its course
& for it to pass naturally, I regret that decision now as when it did start to pass naturally, I literally nearly bled to death,
I was slipping in and out of counciousness and oh called an ambulance in the end and I ended up having a gynaecologist stick her hand up there to pull all this tissue out which was awful. I know that this is a rare occurrence but from what I've heard from friends etc, a d&c seems the better option xx

 

[Juice]

Thank you everyone for your sharing your experiences. This isn't an easy subject to discuss and I really appreciate you all posting your stories to help me.

Last night after lots of discussion, I decided I wanted the D&C. However, I woke up this morning having completely changed my mind. I think I want to let it happen naturally. Or at least wait a week or so and then see how I feel if it hasn't happened by then. I know there's a chance I'll end up with a D&C anyway if it doesn't all come away on it's own, but I want to try and let my body do what it needs to do. For me these are the only two options because I really don't like the idea of hormone interfering drugs.
Tomorrow I'll probably wake up with a completely different decision and we'll be right back to square one. I really wish I had the words to express how amazing my Fiancé is being right now. He's so supportive and being so honest and understanding about everything. He's hurting so much right now. I've only ever seen him cry a little bit once in the time we've been together, but yesterday he really broke down and we cried together a lot. But despite all that, he's still managing to be my rock.
Whatever we decide to do, I know we'll get through it together. I just wish I could make the damn decision and stick to it!!
Sorry for the essay!

 

[Happyfeet]

I think it's very sensible to take your time and make sure your decision is right for you. We're all thinking of you here.

 

[Sunbeam638]

I'm so so sorry Hun xx

I had two natural mcs but after the second one I would have opted for a D&C just so it wasn't prolonged. Only a decision you can make though. Hope you take lots of rest & lots of xxx

 

[CARNAT22]

Oh Juice sweetie,

I have only just seen this - you poor love.

I think it is a very good idea to take your time and weigh up your options.

I've had 3 miscarriages, 2 of which happened spontaneously at early gestation. However my first miscarriage, whilst natural, was very prolonged.

It took 20 days from spotting to having actual miscarriage, looking back I don't know how I walked around for almost 3 weeks waiting for my baby to leave?

I even carried on working, I think I went into some kind of denial [or I was so blissfully ignorant about it all back then??]

Medical management nor D&C was ever mentioned to me, I was scanned 6 times during the time it took for m/c to occur. Looking back I wonder at what point they would have offered to intervene?

Luckily all of my miscarriages have occured at home and although the first one was awful (lots of bleeding and terrible cramps) I am thankful I didn't need any more medical intervention. My body eventually did what it needed to do.

The main reason to opt for a D&C is that it gives you some control - you know when m/c is going to happen so to speak. You eliminate the worry of it suddenly happening?

Obviously if you opt for a more natural route you may negate the need for an operation.

It is a tough call darling and one only you can make.

I think in all honesty if I found myself in that situation again I'd have to opt for a D&C - I couldn't go through that torture of waiting again.

Best wishes and lots of love to you.

xxxxxxxxxxx

 

[Hope81]

Sorry for your loss
Tried medical management 3 times and didn't work ... So I had to go for the d&c.
It was easy, fast and no pain other than some mild cramps like period ones. The recovery after the anesthesia was really fast and I was on my feet in like 10 min... I was back on normal activity next morning after a good sleep that night.
The bleeding was minimal but lasted 2-3 weeks. I got my period back around 2 weeks after my bleeding stopped.
My first period wad heavy and quite painful and of longer duration than normal but nth that I couldn't manage with some ibuprofen and paracetamol.

Good luck with whatever you choose and so sorry for your lost once again

 

[Sue Clare]

You sound very brave and level headed.
You will do what's best for you.
Take care of yourself xx

 

[SunnySue]

So sorry to hear what you are going through hun
I never had to have any medical intervention so I really have no advice as far as any of that is concerned, I just wanted to say how sorry I am.
You sound like you and you OH have an amazing bond and it is so lovely to hear that you are sticking together through such a rough time.
Wishing you all the best, whatever you decide to do xxx