MMC - Options?

[dyscochick]

sorry to hear about wht you are going through. There are quite a fwe posts about medical managements not working. It worked for me. My story was exactly the same as your, the baby stopped growing at 8 weeks and it was spotted at the 11 week scan. I had a medically managed and had it at home cos baby measured less than 9 weeks. I could be comfortable in my own home, wih OH there to look after me. I had a lot less pain than others describe, possibly because i was relaxed and in my own environment. For me it worked well and actually passed most of the products each time i went to the loo. I'd feel a slight urge to push and would pass the tissue then. (sorry i hope this isn't TMI but thought it might help, it does depend how squeamish you are. I would never knock a D&C if thats your choice, but from many comments on here both procedures could leave you bleeding or cramping for a couple of week after. Mine tailed off after about week. I didn't like the idea of a general anaesthetic, and its not completely drug free either, as they locally inject something to help dilate the cervix and may give drugs to control blood loss. Its a hard and personal choice, I knew i couldn't carry my baby a minute longer knowing what i knew, and that i couldnt go back to work waiting for it to happen naturally.

So sorry you are making this decision, i hope which ever option you go for it goes as well as it can xxx

 

[Juice]

I can't express how grateful I am to everyone here who has offered words of support, advice and experience. I'm feeling strong and positive and that is partly down to all of you. Colin and I are thinking about the future to keep us busy and have decided to start planning our wedding so we have something positive to focus on.

If you don't mind ladies, I have another question...
For now I'm waiting to see if nature will do it's thing and I can do this with as little intervention as possible. Firstly, I was wondering how long the doctors will allow me to wait before they have to intervene?
Also, I keep getting twinges in my tummy and the odd pain in my back and I keep thinking "oh god is this it starting?" but so far, nothing horrendous and not even a spot of blood. Is this me being paranoid or are these the types of pains I should be looking out for?

It's so cruel! It's like waiting for labour to start but with no excitement or reward at the end. I guess one of the positives we can draw from this is that as soon as it's over we can start TTC again. Hopefully with more luck!

Oh! Another little question... Not sure if anyone will be able to help with this one though... Colin is quite a bit older than me - he is in his 40's. A month or so ago we asked the midwife if his age could contribute to a higher chance of MC, to which she quickly replied "no" before I'd even finished the question. Today on Wikipedia, Colin found a page that said his age raises our risk of MC by up to 400%!!!
I was wondering if anyone else has asked this question and what were you told? We're a bit concerned now! And we don't want to do any more googling!

Thank you again for everything! And sorry about this essay!

 

[dyscochick]

Darlin please please don't look for reasons for the mc, don't let it put that fear in you and that number may be based on one study. Sadly so many pregnancies end in mc, if it's your first and hopefully only one there is no benefit in looking for a reason.

My mmc was medically managed but the cramps was how it started so I suspect that might be it but it could take a while. I was told I'd be allowed to give it a couple of weeks to come naturally. So I decided not to go that route. Either way, whatever ends up happening, give it one cycle after you mc then try again if that's where you are. I, and I know others, was desperate to try again immediately. We waited one cycle to be on the safe side and mentally I was in a much much better place by then

 

[Hope81]

Don't start looking for answers as there isn't any...
Unfortuantely it happens and you did nth wrong or you can do nth to prevent it...
Sadly we have been there and we have lots of success stories to tell you


It will happen, focus on getting your self well, eat healthy, enjoy life and try again

 

[H16]

Mine started with period type cramping that became worse over several hours, the pain then moved round my side and into my back. Went to bed, woke up next day feeling absolutely fine and then 4 hours later I started bleeding. Back pain is definitely one to watch out for.

I am not really sure how long they leave you to start to mc before they will intervene but I guess maybe a week as if it doesn't start they will want to sort it out so you won't get an infection.

Please don't google things hun as all it causes is more heartache and it often isn't even accurate, I have made the googling mistake myself in the past.

Look at all these men that have had babies late in life........Des O'Connor was 72! Men can continue having children much later than us women so I really wouldn't worry xxx

 

[Sunshine_1]

Hun please don't start trying to find reasons, so far I have found about a million reasons for mine, and will admit all I've succeeded in doing is making myself a million times more paranoid and hating myself even more. The reason could be one of a million and more than likely nothing you or your OH caused or if it was, nothing that would cause it to happen next time.

Get this MC over with, recover, give yourself a little time and have Faith that it won't happen again, let faith win over fear, because fear is just 'False Expectations Appearing Real', and only faith and belief can win over fear

 

[MrsHope]

Sorry to hear of your loss. I had a mmc on 16th July and had the erpc procedure the next day. It is entirely your choice a d whatever u feel comfortable with. Good luck with whatever happens xx

 

[Becky1]

Sorry to hear about your loss Juice. I too have just had miscarriage. I found out on tues and decided on surgery to manage it. I had that this morning and although it was traumatic it is over and I now can try and focus on moving on. Hope you are ok hun. Take care of each other xxx

 

[Juice]

Thanks ladies. I'm still waiting for nature to kick in, but so far nothing has happened. It's a week tomorrow since we found out at our scan but it's as if my body just isn't listening!

 

[jojo3972]

Its horrible how our bodies do this and think its all ok,it can take weeks its horrible x

 

[KitKat72]

Hi Everyone,
I've only just joined the forum as I googled what I'm going through and your post came up Juice. I'm in exactly the same position - found out at my 12 week scan on Thursday that our bubba had passed away at 8 weeks. We have opted for the surgical route (in two days) as our nurse told us the other two options were 'not for the faint hearted'. I also think my baby has no desire to leave my body - I've had absolutely no signs or symptoms that anything was wrong.

I'm sure what ever you do, it will be the right decision for you. Let us know how you decide to proceed.

Lots of love x

 

[Juice]

Hi Ladies,
Just a quick update!
Finally, last night my body decided to give up my pregnancy. It had been 9 days since we found at our scan. I'd been spotting since Saturday morning and getting very slight cramps in my back and abdomen.
Then last night I went to the toilet for a... ahem... and I think the pushing and straining is what started it off. I began bleeding quite a bit and stayed on the toilet for an hour or so. Then I came off and walked around a bit, went back to the toilet to do some clean up and then decided to go to bed. As soon as I got in bed I started having quite strong pain that came in waves lasting a few minutes before going away and coming back about a minute later.
This went on for about 20 minutes and and then I felt quite a bit of blood come out. I rushed back to the toilet and soon after I passed everything, fully in tact. I bled some more, had a shower and then went to bed.
This morning I have very very mild cramps and I'm bleeding like a heavy period. I feel completely well, just a little tired.
After reading all your experiences, ladies, I feel that I was exceptionally lucky to have it all happen so quickly with not much pain.

I want to thank you all again for helping me through this difficult time.
All you ladies who are expecting - I wish you safe and happy pregnancies and beautiful healthy babies!
To everyone who is TTC - good luck and I'll see you in the TTC forums is a couple of months!

Love, hope and luck to all you fantastic and brave women!

Juice x x x

 

[Becky1]

Hi juice, really pleased to read your post and that everything passed relatively easily. I took the surgical option and am experiencing quite a lot of pain from cramps at the moment. Although they are making me feel less of a fraud for being off work!

Life has dealt us a cruel blow but we just have to dust ourselves down and carry on so to speak. Look forward to catching up in ttc forum soon xxx

 

[kiwifrootkai]

So sorry for your loss hun, but glad it went as smooth as can be.

Good luck TTC!
xo