Long termers 6 months or more

[Gemsy]

Just to send hugs to all you ladies. Its such an emotional rollercoaster, and it plays havoc with your relationship too. OH and I decided this month to try and concentrate on our relationship a bit and it has helped - literally all we were doing was thinking about having sex around ovulation, and it ruins both your sex life and your relationship.

On the lifestyle side for men....I used to be an equine AI technician, so did lots of sperm analysis. I would echo what the ladies say about it not all being about the SA results - there are things we can't see under a microscope that are big contributors to fertility. And it works both ways - I looked at some sperm under a microscope and you wouldn't think it had a hope but it still worked on a regular basis. And then you would have some that looked excellent but never achieved pregnancies. So any lifestyle changes they can make (without putting their life totally on hold), are, I think, helpful.

x

 

[Alexis2017]

Sunflower when in your cycle did you start spatone? I will try it but prob too late for this cycle as cd#8 today. I was thinking of trying less this month and before cd#14 so cd#10 and #13. I think I ovulate on same day as my positive opk but I do get ewcm earlier at times on cd#11 but not always.

I took it for a couple of months...my fertility doc was really keen on me keeping my iron up. It's one sachet a day and you don't eat food half an hr before or after. When I got pregnant we dtd every day when I was fertile...but it's worth mixing it up a bit if you've tried that already.

We have mostly dtd every 2nd day. We have dtd every day maybe two cycles or maybe 3 max but we find that challenging with me being on 24/7 on call once a month which leads to me being to tired if worked a long shift etc...s usually every 2nd day is best for us. One of my friends said maybe if you did too much it could be why? I dunno...we have tried every pattern of dtd going tbh

Yes, my OH had a sperm test before he started hydrating - they said he was dehydrated and the motility was ok but lower than ideal....now it's better.

You know that your OH drinking coffee and beer is bad for fertility? It's worth getting him to stop all alcohol and go to one coffee a day. That's what is recommended, especially if you are having trouble. I don't think it's just about the sperm quality either. There are suggestions that too much coffee causes sperm DNA damage. He needs to drink lots of water and cranberry juice is great for male fertility. I don't think it's just about the sperm test....don't let a good sperm test make you think that his lifestyle isn't important. We got pregnant after my OH started on the cranberry juice and exercising.

I really recommend AI ... it doesn't matter how tired you are, you can still time it perfectly. And dtd with it every day didn't deplete the amounts for us at all. We only started because we were desperate after 2 yrs and it did work, even though we lost this one.

Here is an article about caffeine causing molecular damage to sperm (it says a bit of alcohol is fine though) https://www.telegraph.co.uk/men/act...oo-much-coffee-damages-fertility-for-men.html

I have spoken to him numerous occasions and he refuses to make any changes due to his 1 sample being excellent. He just doesn't get it even after all this time be won't make a change.

What's AI?

 

[Alexis2017]

Well pinky discharge has started.. which always means af is on the way.
it’s just not fair.

Sorry hunni. I agree it's more than unfair...
Get that wine at the ready

 

[Sunflower1]

Sunflower when in your cycle did you start spatone? I will try it but prob too late for this cycle as cd#8 today. I was thinking of trying less this month and before cd#14 so cd#10 and #13. I think I ovulate on same day as my positive opk but I do get ewcm earlier at times on cd#11 but not always.

I took it for a couple of months...my fertility doc was really keen on me keeping my iron up. It's one sachet a day and you don't eat food half an hr before or after. When I got pregnant we dtd every day when I was fertile...but it's worth mixing it up a bit if you've tried that already.

We have mostly dtd every 2nd day. We have dtd every day maybe two cycles or maybe 3 max but we find that challenging with me being on 24/7 on call once a month which leads to me being to tired if worked a long shift etc...s usually every 2nd day is best for us. One of my friends said maybe if you did too much it could be why? I dunno...we have tried every pattern of dtd going tbh

Yes, my OH had a sperm test before he started hydrating - they said he was dehydrated and the motility was ok but lower than ideal....now it's better.

You know that your OH drinking coffee and beer is bad for fertility? It's worth getting him to stop all alcohol and go to one coffee a day. That's what is recommended, especially if you are having trouble. I don't think it's just about the sperm quality either. There are suggestions that too much coffee causes sperm DNA damage. He needs to drink lots of water and cranberry juice is great for male fertility. I don't think it's just about the sperm test....don't let a good sperm test make you think that his lifestyle isn't important. We got pregnant after my OH started on the cranberry juice and exercising.

I really recommend AI ... it doesn't matter how tired you are, you can still time it perfectly. And dtd with it every day didn't deplete the amounts for us at all. We only started because we were desperate after 2 yrs and it did work, even though we lost this one.

Here is an article about caffeine causing molecular damage to sperm (it says a bit of alcohol is fine though) https://www.telegraph.co.uk/men/act...oo-much-coffee-damages-fertility-for-men.html

I have spoken to him numerous occasions and he refuses to make any changes due to his 1 sample being excellent. He just doesn't get it even after all this time be won't make a change.

What's AI?

It's artificial insemination - it's a bit drastic, but it helped us get pregnant. It takes very little physical effort which means you can time it perfectly and have to worry about being tired.

 

[Sunflower1]

My first AF since the mc started today so I'm back in the game.... first time I've been glad to see AF in a while!

 

[Alexis2017]

My first AF since the mc started today so I'm back in the game.... first time I've been glad to see AF in a while!

I am sire you will get a BFP that will stick very soon. So how do you go about AI? It worked for you so that's the main thing. I don't think DH would agree to it.

 

[xMillie]

I bet it’s the tea that ruins hubbys sperm.. we conceived early summer last year. The weather was nice.. he was drinking wayyyy less tea. Guess we’re never having a baby since he won’t give it up or cut back.

 

[Gemsy]

I bet it’s the tea that ruins hubbys sperm.. we conceived early summer last year. The weather was nice.. he was drinking wayyyy less tea. Guess we’re never having a baby since he won’t give it up or cut back.

Can you throw the tea out the house?!

 

[Alexis2017]

I bet it’s the tea that ruins hubbys sperm.. we conceived early summer last year. The weather was nice.. he was drinking wayyyy less tea. Guess we’re never having a baby since he won’t give it up or cut back.

Aye that's so frustrating I feel your pain. I think my husband must pee out coffee (that would be gross) I sent him the link sunflower shared about male fertility and he said ' are you on at me again?' So annoying as why shoukd us women make so many changes and try whatever we can to improve our chances if the male variety just sits back expecting to do nothing but have a good time.

I do wonder though when the articles say that obesity and poor health doesnt help yet I know loads of women and men who are SO unhealthy and have managed to make babies very easily so it's not effected them. Part of me thinks your either very fertile or your not and not much will change that but luck and sheer determination to succeed. I am well known for working hard to achieve somethibg and being one determined goat ! I dunno if this will help in this case as so far I have got no where but a fertility clinic.

Anyway it's time to start work. I think we will start dtd tonigjt on cd#10 but just going to dtd cd#10 13 and 15 then next montj we will try the every day approach and by that time we will be on the waiting list for treatment.

Hope you all have a good day !

 

[xMillie]

I tried speaking to him about it last night and got the same result as always ‘my sperm tests were fine’

I said what about even just cutting back 1 a day. Not expecting him to drop it completely over night.. he still won’t.


Well I’m out again today. Af is here and in so much pain, haven’t had period pain this bad in years

 

[Nikkibiscuit]

I'm sorry Millie and Alexis it's so hard getting them to make changes. Took me over 6 months of nagging to get OH to stop smoking. He only smoked socially when having a pint which I think frustrated me more cos I knew he wasn't addicted. Eventually the penny dropped about2 months ago and I found some nicotine gum and he admitted he was using it when out to try and stop. I think he's only had one slip since then but our doctor was reslly firm about it and said that the infertility docs if it comes to that won't look at treatment if he is smoking. This may or may not be true but it was enough to give him a kick up the arse.

Hydration thing in interesting. We both drink plenty of water cos we don't drink tea or coffee. So drink a lot of sugar free squash both in the house and take a big bottle to work everyday. But hubby is a very hot and sweaty person when he cycles to work and just generally in life so he may be more dehydrated than we think. Xx

 

[Sunflower1]

My first AF since the mc started today so I'm back in the game.... first time I've been glad to see AF in a while!

I am sire you will get a BFP that will stick very soon. So how do you go about AI? It worked for you so that's the main thing. I don't think DH would agree to it.

My DH did not want to do it at first, but I explained that it separates sex for fun from baby making, which can actually make your sex life better, plus it reduces the stress which means better chance of conceiving.

It's basically sterile plastic pots and latex free needleless 10ml syringes from ebay. I only use fertility fiendly lubricant for the outside of the syringe, and got pregnant without needing it otherwise. I eat a lot of oranges the week before for the vitamin C which makes yur EWCM better.

Your OH deposits into the pot, you suck it up with syringe (some people warm it up first but it's still liquid so I don't see the point), get bubbles out, I put syringe in, let it warm up for a while and very slowly depress the plunger. I put my hips up first, stay like that for 30 mins and gently rock side to side. Helps if you have an orgasm too. It's very scientific but requires so little energy that if your OH is well hydrated you can do it every day for a few days without the quantity going down at all. It's taken so much of the stress out of it for us.

Research says it works just as well as the normal method.

Thanks for the encouragement on getting a sticky bean...I'm not feeling hopeful...I'm 42 and the nurse who dealt with the mc quoted all the depressing stats for over 40s at me right after the scan, I was devastated. Plus my first AF after the mc doesn't seem heavy enough.

 

[xMillie]

My first AF since the mc started today so I'm back in the game.... first time I've been glad to see AF in a while!

I am sire you will get a BFP that will stick very soon. So how do you go about AI? It worked for you so that's the main thing. I don't think DH would agree to it.

My DH did not want to do it at first, but I explained that it separates sex for fun from baby making, which can actually make your sex life better, plus it reduces the stress which means better chance of conceiving.

It's basically sterile plastic pots and latex free needleless 10ml syringes from ebay. I only use fertility fiendly lubricant for the outside of the syringe, and got pregnant without needing it otherwise. I eat a lot of oranges the week before for the vitamin C which makes yur EWCM better.

Your OH deposits into the pot, you suck it up with syringe (some people warm it up first but it's still liquid so I don't see the point), get bubbles out, I put syringe in, let it warm up for a while and very slowly depress the plunger. I put my hips up first, stay like that for 30 mins and gently rock side to side. Helps if you have an orgasm too. It's very scientific but requires so little energy that if your OH is well hydrated you can do it every day for a few days without the quantity going down at all. It's taken so much of the stress out of it for us.

Research says it works just as well as the normal method.

Thanks for the encouragement on getting a sticky bean...I'm not feeling hopeful...I'm 42 and the nurse who dealt with the mc quoted all the depressing stats for over 40s at me right after the scan, I was devastated. Plus my first AF after the mc doesn't seem heavy enough.

I’m honestly considering trying this now Sunflower. I’ve been at the point where I hate sex for a long time now. It’s not fun when you need/have to do it to Cover ovulation.

I’ve never read up on it before. Do you just cover the same days you would if you were just dtd?

It may not work anyway for us but at least I wouldn’t have to go through the whole ‘I guess we better have sex now’ each month.


And I’m sorry about the nurse at the scan. I hope you are one of the lucky ones that catch really soon after xx

 

[Sunflower1]

My first AF since the mc started today so I'm back in the game.... first time I've been glad to see AF in a while!

I am sire you will get a BFP that will stick very soon. So how do you go about AI? It worked for you so that's the main thing. I don't think DH would agree to it.

My DH did not want to do it at first, but I explained that it separates sex for fun from baby making, which can actually make your sex life better, plus it reduces the stress which means better chance of conceiving.

It's basically sterile plastic pots and latex free needleless 10ml syringes from ebay. I only use fertility fiendly lubricant for the outside of the syringe, and got pregnant without needing it otherwise. I eat a lot of oranges the week before for the vitamin C which makes yur EWCM better.

Your OH deposits into the pot, you suck it up with syringe (some people warm it up first but it's still liquid so I don't see the point), get bubbles out, I put syringe in, let it warm up for a while and very slowly depress the plunger. I put my hips up first, stay like that for 30 mins and gently rock side to side. Helps if you have an orgasm too. It's very scientific but requires so little energy that if your OH is well hydrated you can do it every day for a few days without the quantity going down at all. It's taken so much of the stress out of it for us.

Research says it works just as well as the normal method.

Thanks for the encouragement on getting a sticky bean...I'm not feeling hopeful...I'm 42 and the nurse who dealt with the mc quoted all the depressing stats for over 40s at me right after the scan, I was devastated. Plus my first AF after the mc doesn't seem heavy enough.

I’m honestly considering trying this now Sunflower. I’ve been at the point where I hate sex for a long time now. It’s not fun when you need/have to do it to Cover ovulation.

I’ve never read up on it before. Do you just cover the same days you would if you were just dtd?

It may not work anyway for us but at least I wouldn’t have to go through the whole ‘I guess we better have sex now’ each month.


And I’m sorry about the nurse at the scan. I hope you are one of the lucky ones that catch really soon after xx

It's the same days. I ovulate around day 10, so we do days 7, 9, 10, 11. I recommend ClearBlue advanced four days too although the last two cycles I did it on intuition.

 

[xMillie]

Ok thanks xx

I’ll have a word with hubby later and if he’s game I think it’s worth us trying

 

[Sunflower1]

Ok thanks xx

I’ll have a word with hubby later and if he’s game I think it’s worth us trying

If you decide to go ahead I can send you links to the equipment I use...it arrives in a few days...it's cheap too. I only get stuff that is in labeled sterile and individually packaged. Never reuse a syringe...it's just not hygienic. The best thing about this method is that you can literally get ovulation pains and if your OH is around, you can get the sperm in there in record time! Also I recommend your OH stays well hydrated as then you can do it several days in a row without the amount decreasing. Cranberry juice is great for the man too.

 

[xMillie]

Thanks Sunflower, that would be really helpful if you could share xx

If the bits needed are all here soon for this cycle we could try it in a couple of weeks.

I’ve spent the afternoon reading up a few things and watching videos, we were considering trying some iui’s at some point but I don’t feel like throwing loads of money at something that might not work anyway. It’s so depressing.

This seems almost as good of an idea, should take the stress off.
Even though I keep telling myself we’re not really trying but not preventing.. deep down I still get worked up each month hoping that it could be the month.

 

[Alexis2017]

I would try this but I know DH won't be up for that...not yet anyway I think If need to talk him into it. I will try suggesting it next month once we are on ivf waiting list and see what he says.

 

[Nikkibiscuit]

Got to be honest ladies I don't think AI would be for us but great idea if it works for you. Guess it's not different to IVF/IUI really of a fashion. End of the day it's just about swimmers in the right place at the right time.

Off to the docs shortly for blood results. See where we go from here x

 

[Sunflower1]

Thanks Sunflower, that would be really helpful if you could share xx

If the bits needed are all here soon for this cycle we could try it in a couple of weeks.

I’ve spent the afternoon reading up a few things and watching videos, we were considering trying some iui’s at some point but I don’t feel like throwing loads of money at something that might not work anyway. It’s so depressing.

This seems almost as good of an idea, should take the stress off.
Even though I keep telling myself we’re not really trying but not preventing.. deep down I still get worked up each month hoping that it could be the month.

from what I've read intrauterine has about the same sucess rate as AI at home - if you read the forums tons of women get pregnant.

Only ever use each item once.

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/60ml-STE...e=STRK:MEBIDX:IT&_trksid=p2057872.m2749.l2649

The seller for the syringes has left, but here are the same ones. You want 10ml ones. https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/MULTIPLE...hash=item2a3ca1abe0:m:mrOOLE4GW21vnqQSRrGKqsQ

I tried with Conceive Plus and without, and without worked for me.