How many is too many?

[LuW]

re the tattoos.... I made L choose tbh- he wanted a massive one over his chest and shoulders so I said well you've your four year bonus coming up, either use that money for it or well put that money aside for Baby when he comes along. He didn't take long to come back to me ans say the moneys going away and instead hes having a little one with Billies birthdate and initials above my favourite tattoo when he gets home. His choice and I'm damn proud of him for it. He could have had his tattoo because we can afford but he'd rather put the money aside.


I don't get people who complain they can't afford but don't do anything about it and just decide to spend more or have more children =[ xx

 

[nikki8092]

Definately!! And at least you know you are doing the best by your kids which is the whole point really. i know a lot of mums that use the excuse "there are no jobs" there are its just ones they dont want to do...

 

[nikki8092]

LuW i totally agree, it annoys me that my friend just kept having kids because she knew they would get more money. You dont bring them into this world to benefit from them its just wrong

 

[LuW]

It just makes me cringe! Benefits are there for short term help for those who need it, if you can't afford to look after yourself then get yourself to a talkwise clinic and get a lovely brown paperbag FULLLLLL of contraceptives.
Don't think I've every actually bought condoms...... Always got them for free =D

 

[AugustMum]

I use the excuse there are no jobs, but tbh, I really want to work! But because Im a single mum its hard finding jobs that are within travelling distance and start at the right time. Ive seen so many job that start at 8am and theres just no way I could take it because I wouldnt be able to find childcare that early. Or shift work, I cant take because I cant afford to pay for a full weeks childcare just because I might be working 3 days and they change every week, if you get my drift. BUT! There are usually jobs out there that will be ok. Like I applied for 2 last night. You've just got to look Im determined to own my own home by the beginning of 2013 and my daughter will grow up knowing that you can achieve anything if you put your mind to it and will have a good work ethic.

 

[nikki8092]

Augustmum thats completely different though, im talking about mums who could do jobs but just dont want to do that particular job. So really yours isnt an excuse as you would need a job to fit round your children and thats different. For example my friend got offered a cleaning job 10-2 but she felt cleaning was beneath her so didnt take it, then complained she couldnt find a job x

 

[LuW]

Yayy!!=D You've just gota look, it's a ballache when your alone trying to find childcare that fits around your job=[ I've been doing everything I can to help a friend get back into work but I know she's scared that once shes working if she doesn't get childcare vouchers she really wont be able to afford, so I think she's trying to hold off until next sept when her daughters in school, because her boyfriend works nights it means he'll be able to pick the little girl up/drop her off if she's at work too late or early.

I know it's been drivig her mad being on benefits though, but she's spent most of her time on a home study course in beauty therapy so shes made up for missing out on things when her little one was a baby and she didn't want to leave her at all.

 

[nikki8092]

And LuW my friend who has the kids taken off her should be sterilised as im sure she will go on to try and have more, even if they do get taken off her. Its cruel!

 

[LuW]

Augustmum thats completely different though, im talking about mums who could do jobs but just dont want to do that particular job. So really yours isnt an excuse as you would need a job to fit round your children and thats different. For example my friend got offered a cleaning job 10-2 but she felt cleaning was beneath her so didnt take it, then complained she couldnt find a job x

I'd have had that job to fit around my other two! I'm finished work wise by like half 9! loll!! Why do people think cleanings that bad! Usually it's a pretty good wage too... lol!

 

[nikki8092]

i know, i was like why cant you do that and she just said im not cleaning toilets for a living... beggers cant be choosers and all that and its not like it had to be a permanent fixture! x

 

[LuW]

And LuW my friend who has the kids taken off her should be sterilised as im sure she will go on to try and have more, even if they do get taken off her. Its cruel!

It's just wrong! These days too many people use children for money or as weapons!

L's babys mum has tried taking him to court over payments, to which social asked why he wasn't involved already (because he's in afghan... ring welfare they'll tell you that lol) and then she was asked when he's back in the uk how often will she be letting him see the baby, she said once a week for an hour in her living room. They told her that was unreasonable as we live nearly 3 hours away and if she wants her suport money she needs to rethink her approach to motherhood as a wittness stood to comfirm she was outgetting well and truely sh*tfaced 3 weeks after he was born and does so every thursday friday and sat.

The only way she's getting her money is if L gets to see him on his terms, like being able to have him for the full day minimum and to take him wherever he wants, to zoo park whatever and once we've kids that they're involved too because they#re his family too, and if she starts acting like a mother. I was pretty impressed to say the least!

 

[LuW]

i know, i was like why cant you do that and she just said im not cleaning toilets for a living... beggers cant be choosers and all that and its not like it had to be a permanent fixture! x

I change pensioners nappies.... She want that job?? lolll toilet cleaning at the home is HEAVEN! loll

 

[AugustMum]

Haha Ive just applied for a cleaning job and am really hoping I get it! Ive worked as a cleaner in a nightclub before so really...nothing can be as bad as that lol.

 

[AugustMum]

Also, what I would do for a job that was 10-2. Theyre fab hours!

 

[nikki8092]

i know 10 - 2 who can complain at that. the firm is really good and does alot of hours to suit working mums. LuW too right, i cant believe she expects that of him. Some people are on another planet i think x

 

[LuW]

OOh I remember in like my first week at the home walking into one gentlemans room, and he'd like sweared poo all up the walls in the night. He's passed away since then bless him, he was actually a lovely man when he was really awake, just couldn't remember ANYTHING about himself and acted like a toddler before he'd really woken up!!

Was minging!!! But it's a job! And appart from things like that I love it! And it was a crikey I need more hours job too!

 

[nikki8092]

Lovely!!! Sounds ideal lol. My mate works in a care home and she tells me some horror stories lol.

 

[LuW]

i know 10 - 2 who can complain at that. the firm is really good and does alot of hours to suit working mums. LuW too right, i cant believe she expects that of him. Some people are on another planet i think x

Tbh theres an account set up for the baby ad letters writen and dated being kept safe. We know she isn't going to comply once we've got children because I'm a lying hussy apparently.... but whatever that money and the letters will be here for him when he turns 18 if he comes looking for his dad. Though L's family and the girl are poison so I doubt he ever will if contact is lost =[

 

[nikki8092]

Thats really sad. Even if me and my husband split i would never ever stop him seeing the children as i see that as being cruel and unfair, especially as he is such a good dad.

 

[LuW]

They're a disgusted bunch of excuses to the human race tbh. Her and L's family. I'm letting him deal with the baby because it's not my place, but he knows what I wont stand for when it comes to our children and If he's going all that way to see the baby (wont really be a baby then) but I'll want my kiddies going too so they get to spend all the time they can with their dad and get to know their brother if he's in their dad's life. Hell we're only going to get weekends as a family and if that goes to only one day I'll kick off holy hell. She's already had a paddy that he's on tour, like he has a choice and oooh look he has a job unlike her new boyfriend, and that he's moved up north so we can have a fresh start. None of her business what he does in his home life, she isn't part of it the baby is, if she'll be a big girl and do what she needs to for her money.


She hasn't been told travel expenses will be taken from it too yet... which could be funny. Thats purely because of how far away we lived. and hour closer and she'd get the full amount lol!! XX