Has my Husband cheated?

[mummy1979]

Hi Girls

I really need your honest advice. I've been married a year and have a beautiful baby son whos 6 months old. I would say my relationship with my OH has always been very close and happy but a year ago I noticed on his bill that there was alot of texts to a number who I later discoved was a female. I confronted him and he said she's married and that they are a friend of his from years ago. Ive never met her or her husband but have heard shes a bit of a flirt! He stopped texting her and said it was just nonsense texts. Anyway, I was having a tidy up yesterday and came across bill for the whole of last year and he had been texting her all year and even on his stag do of all times!!!! He said its just nonsense and has apologised as he knows it looks bad but has sworn on our sons life that he has never met up with her or had an affair. It was just silly texts. I dont know if I'm overreacting here but something just doesnt add up and there's a lie somewhere. I really dont know what to do and if you can help please do.

Thanks

xxx

 

[suzie1011]

hi honey first of all


i have been here before. rob did it to me last year with one of my friends. he also though it was harmless until he saw how much it hurt me. i decided to forgive him which was really not easy to do but im glad i did because we are now closer than ever. he also knows if he ever does it again then he stands to loose everything. and that thought scares him into not doing it.
theres a good chance it was just texting and the fact that you husband has stopped shows he knows he was wrong. unfortantly men dont see things like we do. to them there is nothing wrong with this, but we feel there is. the decision on what to do is up to you, but personally i think you should put it behind you (i know its hard) and move on. if you find yourselves back here then something more drastic needs to be done. if he does it again...kill him!

 

[trixipaws]

my boyf texts women and flirts with them all the time it doesnt bother me. but we all have our "line" to cross and if texting is making u feel uncomfortable then tell him so and if he loves you he will stop. if u even want him to go so far as deleting her number for you then he will do it if he knows it means that much to you. also if u trust him then u will believe him if he says he's innocent. if u dont trust him then thats a big issue u both need to sort out.
i'm sorry i'm not that good at this kind of advice coz my bf and i have really loose boundaries so i can come across flippant, i dont mean to if thats the case

have a good chat with him, i'm sure he loves u and sounds like he might not realise how much it bugs you. i'd say dont go all accusatory on him, just explain that it upsets you- and whether over-reacting or not is irrelevant, if somethng upsets the one you love then u stop doing it, even if u do think its over-reacting! i'm sure everything will be fine sweetie x x x

 

[nori]

I really feel for you..My OH was texting and emailing his ex even though he said they werent in contact anymore (im fine with his other ex's but this one was a trouble maker ringing him at stupid hours). The worst part of it was that this was going on when i was seriously ill in hospital. Im 99% sure that nothing apart from stupid texts happened but there is always going to be that 1% doubt because of his silly lies at the time.

I would say give him the benefit of the doubt this time but make it clear that if he ever does anything like that again hes out the door.

Good luck,

Claire x