feeling sorry for myself :-(

[ema-lou24]

i know i shouldnt post up when im feeling so down in the dumps, i should have a possitive mental attitude for all you TTC.

i really dont think a baby is going to happen for us

i take folic acid and zinc and ive even got my OH taking them too. he has a very low sperm count so i heard taking these will help them a little bit.

but then i think i have a problem too, my 21 day blood test came back at 14.5.......its meant to be up in the 30's so i need to go for more tests.

we cant get IVF cos of my having my LO from a previous relationship and we cant afford it TBH

i keep seeing babies, and pregnant women, even saw a pregnant teenager on the street drunk the other day and it made me furious!! (not dissing teenage mums as i was one, i meant her attitude)

why cant we be blessed with one? we have been through so much in the past and together i feel that we deserve one...but clearly not.
I dont want to be one of those women that cry everynight cos she hasnt got her baby, my life at the moment anyways isnt all about babies and baby making etc, but im starting to loose the will for one now.

im starting to blame my mum!! (although she doesnt know we TTC) when i fell pregnant with my LO she told me to abort, she laughed in my face when i told her (jokingly) that i wanted another baby

why is nothing in life simple? why do people who dont live for a living, dont want things, get the things they dont want? and the people who work had to get things...dont get it?


im having such a bad day , sorry ladies x

 

[Rowesb]

don't want to read and run
big TTC is hard at the best of times

 

[Emmamb]

Hi,sorry ur feeling like this. Is it the wellman vitamins u've got ur oh on? I was Reading in my preg mag that they have everything in them 2 keep sperm healthy.

Also re: ivf, if u did have to go down this route I know there r some clinics that do it at a reduced rate if u donate some of ur eggs,it obv depends on how many can b harvested and isn't 4 every1 but mite b worth lookin into if that ends up been the best route.

Fx u get ur bfp soon, try not to worry about ur results until they've done more tests,mite just b that u ovulate later than they expect xxx

 

[vixforever]

Sorry you're feeling so low hun, I know what you mean about the teenager I'm one myself but I'm a sensible one x Don't give up x

 

[clem]

Hi ema-lou, I'm feeling sorry for myself today as well and agree with all the things you are feeling (re other women etc). Especially the women with several children, when we dont have any and have been trying so long. I saw in the paper a women who had 12 kids (from various fathers) and got £75k a year in benefits and I was shocked at the vehemence of my anger, I actually said "Fu**ing B**ch!" out loud and amazed my oh as I hardly ever swear. We both work so hard and such long hours as we are trying really hard to set up a good future for ourselves and our children, but is it worth it?
Anyway, big hugs, we have to stay positive it will happen eventually otherwise we would feel a million times worse right? It will, it will, it will................
xxxx

 

[katiejane]

Ok, now where do I start..... as you already know i'm a bit fed up today too hun for different reason to you. But I have felt like this and when you're TTC you do have days like this, the stress and pressure and constant disapointment at this point is unbearable.

You should post when you're feeling so down in the dumps, this forum isn't just for happy positive posts, its to vent whatever your feeling, a place to be honest, perhaps when you can't be elsewhere - its safe to rant in here.

I can understand why you are loosing faith now, the last few months have been so hard and disapointing for you both in your quest for a baby. I do think it will happen, and I hope its soon. Sometimes just as you let go of a dream it comes true, look at what happened to me chick, I didn't even want to take a pregnancy test because I thought it was a waste of time and money! I believe your coming towards the point I was at, which is why i'm convinced somethings going to happen soon.

Also the day 21 blood test, I agree with an earlier post on here it might mean you're ovulating late or irregular. Just because you can't afford IVF today, doesn't mean it will never be a option for you, don't rule anything out, you never know whats around the corner.

Now how you didn't say something to the selfish girl drinking and pregnant is beyond me, I would have been soo tempted LOL. It's hard when you have friends having babies too, especially one's who just moan at you for stupid things, you should tell them to give their head a shake and pull themselves together.

I believe you will and should be blessed with a baby, but if everything comes too easy we don't appreciate it. Some things are worth the wait, this is one of those things, and the friends that love you will be there for you no matter what happens.

Hope your day picks up, but don't ever be sorry for having a bad day, you're entitled to it and i'd rather read about it and try and send you a hug, than you struggle on alone with all these thoughts in your head.

Lots of love honey xxx

 

[clairebear22]

Hey Hun!

I think anyone TTC is bound to have down days sometimes so rant away!!

I get low some days too & somedays are especially hard for me because i'm a Childminder so i'm constantly surrounded by gorgeous babies and children!

Anyway I just wanted to say that mine and my OH's motto is "all good things come to those who wait". This is because ever since we first met we've had to 'wait' for everything....... We met on a dating website and we had to WAIT ages to meet eachother because I was training for a half marathon every night. Then when we got together we decided we wanted to live together but we had to WAIT because I was private renting and had to wait for my tenancy to end. Now we want a little bubba of our own and yet again we have to WAIT before getting a BFP.

I guess i'm just saying keep your chin up Hun, i'm sure it'll happen for you very soon and who knows maybe we'll both be posting BFP news this month!

Big hugs and tons of babydust! xxxxx

 

[jarjar7]

Oh Hun, I'm sorry you're feeling so down. Haven't really got much to say, nothing better than the Ladies before have said anyway, just wanted to send you love and hugs and hope you start feeling a bit better soon.
xxxx

 

[serenitylove]

big hugs hun and hang in there some of us just have longer harder journeys than others to get our magic bundles but it is worth it in the end xxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[Toonlass]

Awwwww hun Keep your chin up where there's a will there's a way, don't give up on your dreams. One way or another it will happen for you xx

 

[JJ Mum]

I think Katie Jane really summed it up well for me in her post, It is hard when your in it, and when you have had the disapointments you have had recently, but never say never, maybee with these tests, they will be able to tweek something or give you something for your cycle that will help - they are a positive step, pls don't worry about them, just grab the chance for them to look further into whats occuring, ikt may be a more quick and simple fix.

I know you and stu will get your baby, it will be waiting for you x

 

[BabyLover]

Hey Hunni

Sorry your feeling down in the dumps, we all feel like that from time to time....I know exactly what you are saying and agree with you! We have been TTC for years and nothing! I think to myself it is never going to happen for us, but why does it happen to everyone else who probably don't want the child in the first place or like you say girls getting drunk while they are pregnant and don't think anything of it! It makes me mad because there is people like you, me and other people on here TTC would really love to be a mum, but it's not happening.

All I can advise is chin up, stay postive and think to yourself one day you will become that mum that will give the best a son/daughter would wish for!

Donna xx

 

[megsmeadow]

No advice, just

 

[ema-lou24]

thank you ladies, your all so kind and know how to make me feel that little bit better

i keep getting constant reminders from my parents that ive fuked up my life etc, but i dont feel i have, ive made choices that arent the best but ive learned from them but they dont seem to see this, i even got a reminder of it today!

My old friend is getting married tomorrow and i was just nattering away to my mum about it and said theyve been together for ages...she was like 3years isnt ages!! this was a pure dig at me to basically not do anything like they have I.E baby, marriage etc, for at least 5yrs! (me and stu have been together for 2yrs)
FUK THAT! im sorry but i know i have met "the one" (and i think i know) so im not gonna wait another 3yrs to have babies etc cos she doesnt think someone can "know" someone enough in 3 yrs- the time this couple have been together)

i just feel i should give up...it will keep my mother happy i suppose...she doesnt think im a good enough mother to my son, so why should i be blessed with another??

altho my sister is the bees-knees, she went to uni, became a nurse, met a man, got engaged, married and had the kid (in the 5years, the proper way supposidly) but yet my mum STILL looks down my her nose at my sisters parenting skills...so i cant be that bad lol...

sorry, yet another rant.

i just think my mum will b happier is i went away and had a hysterectomy!!!