controlled crying

I don't agree if you use it then your child or baby won't call for help or thinks it can't if distressed, we did cc on our son at 13 months and he stopped the two one oz bottles and slept through. He still wakes and calls for us if ill, teething, or too hot and that's fine I go to him and comfort him he knows we will be there as soon as he cries so unless that's just because we did it at an older age then I don't agree with that at all.

mummy to my monkey Joshua 19.1.12 and little Oscar the grouch 19.4.13
 
On a brighter note he slept through AGAIN!

Yay! Did he stir at all? I heard Freya whimper a bit at 3.30 as usual but straight back to sleep. she then woke me up at 8am doing a poop. Delighted

Clever babies. X

He stirred at 2am, but again 2 mins later fast asleep...I can't believe how quick these babya clock on!
 
Well done mrs V. This is excellent news.

I am pleased it has worked for you. Just think, from a very small period of crying you have enabled your baby to have an almost full night of sleep unbroken without many episodes of screaming etc

Big success. Long may it continue.

As for the wider issue, some of us put our trust in the NHS to help and advise us of how to keep ourselves healthy.

To be told that we are 'damaging our kids' following the advice that is published is never going to go down well.
 
I agree Torino and I want to say this as well:

Controlled crying is always an emotive and polarising topic on here and probably elsewhere when it is discussed, precisely for the reason that you say. Plenty of people have done it and the last thing they want to hear is that it could have damaged their child, particularly when as you say various health care professionals and resources still advocate it or don't dissuade from it.

For me, though, it's a bit like breastfeeding (and probably plenty of other issues that others can name). We are all aware of the breast is best advice and the mountain of research that sits behind it. I tried breastfeeding and it didn't work for us. I would be the first to admit that it wasn't that I *couldn't*. J latched (badly) and was getting milk, he survived exclusively on it for 2 weeks, but I found it very painful and stressful and found it difficult to cope. It was affecting me psychologically. We made the decision to go to mixed feeding, knowing it wasn't the gold standard, but taking all the factors into account it was the best thing overall we could do for all of us.

I've come to terms with that and it doesn't particularly worry me, but I have a friend who attempted to breastfeed, had insurmountable problems (not like mine, she really couldn't even with plenty of professional help) and she still feels guilty. So she finds all the facebook posts and breast is best info distressing, because it triggers that for her.

From the small amount of evidence I've seen, the jury is still out on CC. But there is lots of evidence that sleep deprivation affects people psychologically and physically. So I can understand that for some families it's not just a matter of persevering with the more gentle methods, they need to consider the whole family's needs and do what's best for the group as a whole.

I've had it said to me many times since I stopped breastfeeding and I honestly believe it's true: A happy mummy makes for a happy baby.

Well done to the mummies and babies that are having success and getting some sleep xxx
 
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From the small amount of evidence I've seen, the jury is still out on CC. But there is lots of evidence that sleep deprivation affects people psychologically and physically. So I can understand that for some families it's not just a matter of persevering with the more gentle methods, they need to consider the whole family's needs and do what's best for the group as a whole.

Excellently put.
 
Gracefully stepping down if you don't mind ladies, thank you to those who have listened xx
 
Clever boy for sleeping through the night and well done mummy for the good job xx

I am one of the lucky ones that has a baby that learnt to self settle early. She never cries not unless she is poorly, frightened etc so I always go to her when she is crying, immediately and without fail.
She knows how to settle herself so if she wakes crying it means I must get there fast, she knows I will,I built a relation of trust with her and I am not going to betray that trust by letting her cry, whatever the reason of the crying is nor I am willing to find out in the future if there is any damage or not for me not responding to her needs. Sleep training it's not for me, I am way to weak to do it and the guilt will kill me. I also know how not fun is to get yourself to sleep after you cried. You almost feel sick, exhausted and abandoned. Not sth that I ever want my baby to feel. I want her to go to bed happy not cry herself to sleep.

BUT I have a baby that sleeps fine I have no idea what I would have done if she didn't. Sleep deprivation Is bad for the whole family and quite dangerous for a mum that has to work, drive to work etc. then you do what you have to do and hope for the best.

I am so very blessed to have a baby that dosent cry unless she really needs me there.

As all parenting ideas do your research and do whatever is best for your family.

Though against sleep training I can see why people do it,

I would let a 3-4 year old cry because she had a paddy and wants to watch a movie instead of going to sleep. Then I can reason with her and explain her that mummy loves her so much and she is still here but you have to sleep so you are rested and sorry that you don't want to. We will record the movie and watch together tomorrow.

Though 1 year olds are capable of manipulation (they fry mummy comes) you can't reason with them they will not understand why they cry and mummy dosent come? They can't talk and can't express negative emotion other than crying? I just can't do it it dosent seem right.
I am sure though cases that worked so fabulous after just a little crying like Archie are a huge success and it well worth it for the wholes family well been xx
Well done mummy and baby
 

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