Anyone NOT going to have the baby in their room?

[X5OT]

I am still undecided re whehter we have the baby in our room, or whether the baby goes straight into its own room. I guess this stems from the fact that my parents never had me or my 2 brothers in their room - we were in our own rooms from the first night home. We will be using a moses basket, and I would plan to put the baby in the moses basket and then put the basket into the cot. We are planning to purchase a monitor which has breathing and motion sensor. It is also 2-way, so the baby will be able to hear us breathing (and snoring!!). My main reason for not keeping the baby in with us is that I do not want to feed the baby in our bed - too much disturbance for hubby - I want to feed the baby in the nursery at night, so seems silly to carry the baby back & forth between our room and the nursery.

So, as subject line, has anyone decided NOT to keep the baby in their room at all?

Thanks in advance
C

 

[Foxxi]

I have the exact same dilemma.... I really cant decide what to do either.... Im hoping the answer will come to me the first night I bring thr little fella home!!

 

[kimmumof2]

i havent got a room for baby lol its full of stuff that needs sorting. i kept DD in room with me until she was 6 weeks, it was just easier and at 6 weeks she started sleepin more than 6 hours at nite. i suppose its up to you hun and what suits you and your baby. good luck

xxxxx

 

[Josephine_Beth]

It's advised to have the baby in the room with you, however, a friend of mine was told that after a month, to put the baby in it's own room. That way, the baby is more likely to sleep straight through the night.

Apparently, babies wake, if they don't see the mum, the fall back to sleep, if they see the mum, the baby will wake and want the attention.

I for one will have the baby in the same room as me for the first month. You can use monitors but a mother's instinct is a lot stronger, you can feel and your body will auto wake if there is a problem.

But it's down to you what you do xx

p.s. did you know when a mother kisses a baby on the forehead, it's a medical thing. Apparently, our lips pick up hormones etc from the baby and then if we are breast feeding, the milk adjusts to the baby's needs.

 

[Jendon]

Baby wil be in with us initially - his room isnt ready yet anyway. Im not so sympathetic about disturbing the OH when feeding - is that mean of me?! We kept our daughter in with us until she was about 8 weeks old I think and then she went into her cot.

 

[Josephine_Beth]

Ladies!

Why feel for your fellas? It's not like they've carried your baby 9 months, the sickness, pains, discomfort, cravings, lack of sleep..........I for one will be smurking when our LO wakes up daddy too

Or am I being a cow?

 

[lisa&alex]

charlotte slept with me till she was 1, it gave us an amazing bond. and she sleeps all night in ehr room now.. since she was about 1 1/2 she was great. this one is gonna go in its moses basket. and then cot in cahrlottes room after easter i think.

i feel it should be up to each mum to do what ever they want.. people are pushed to put their kids in cots and moses baskets..when i think u should do what u want.. a friend of mine's health visitor told her that she shouldnt have her daughter in ehr room at 9 months, and that she would send round someone to help her put her daughter in routein..id have told ehr to f off thats for sure...

 

[lisa&alex]

Ladies!

Why feel for your fellas? It's not like they've carried your baby 9 months, the sickness, pains, discomfort, cravings, lack of sleep..........I for one will be smurking when our LO wakes up daddy too

Or am I being a cow?

becaseu he will be the one going out to work every morning at 6, and not gettign in till 5. i will be going out of my way for him to have a restfull sleep..i can nap in teh day..

 

[lisa&alex]

ai mid.. we will see.....i dont think ne1 actually tells u how tired u will be when bubs gets here.. i think that was the only thing i shouted at my mum for.. i was like.. u never told me how tired i would be lol...most of the time it was like.. u know when u had a full weekend on the p*ss,(when we were younger) and ur absolutly knackered.. could sleep on a chickens lip kinda thing.. ur that tired at 1am.. n the babys crying n u need matchsticks to keep ur eyes open while feeding!! gah!!

 

[kimmumof2]

i would rather sleepless nights with a newborn than sleepless nights whilst pregnant and uncomfy it driving me mad!!!!! i rwad somewhere about puttin your scent on a blanket if baby does not sleep in room as you then they are comforted when they wake and you aint there. i think it trial and error with what suits you. the less disturbance for baby the better tho to get them sleepin thru the night so either way it can work.

xxxxx

 

[Kylie1007]

Ours will be in our room when its brand new and in the moses basket but once it outgrows that it will have to be in its own room as we don't have the room in ours for the cotbed.

 

[Josephine_Beth]

Seems like there was a sense of humour fail with my last post

 

[Kylie1007]

Ladies!

Why feel for your fellas? It's not like they've carried your baby 9 months, the sickness, pains, discomfort, cravings, lack of sleep..........I for one will be smurking when our LO wakes up daddy too

Or am I being a cow?

Oh no, I've already got this planned! We live at the top of the steepest hill in the WORLD so for the next few years, he'll have to do all the pushing up the hill with the pram! Actually he's started pushing me up the hill and is soon going to have to roll me up.

 

No, I agree with you, Josephine-Beth, and I'm glad that you've shown that there's still a bit of latent feminism left in what's quickly becoming Stepford-wife country!

And that old phrase that he [the partner] 'puts food on the table' - well, try and go without a partner when you have children to test that archaic statement. In the present, in this country, fortunately, we still manage to eat (even if we don't have partners)! But of course that's only thanks to maintenance, tax credits and child benefit. And yes, I know of at least one contributer's views on here about single mothers (as she's already so kindly told us) and I just hope that she doesn't find herself in that position herself one day....

Sadly, there isn't yet a "salary" for being a mum and, until there is, none of us should feel like a cow for being sanctimonious for being woken at 4am

Sorry, Josephine-Beth, for manilpulating what you said to have a dig at our so-called Stepford counterparts (and I await the backlash with glee, ladies!): I know you were only having a light-hearted moan, really. I just think that some of the more, ahem, "opinionated" contributers on here should stop and engage brain before typing sometimes or at least try and pretend to be more diplomatic/tactful at times because I really don't like having to add to their animosity by responding like this.

But then 'opinions are like [you know what], we all have one'.

 

[Squiglet]

I'm sorry I've got the lazy parent switch turned on... I only want the baby in our room for the first few weeks because I'm too lazy to get out of the bed, walk allllll the way to the end of the corridor, just to pick up a screaming baby....no matter how much I love them...

Nah, in my room next too me... I value my sleep to much...

I only put Tia into her own bedroom, when her snoring kept me awake at night...

 

Squiglet,

I had the opposite: MY snoring used to even wake the dog! I think my kids were glad to escape to their own rooms as soon as they could But I had them within touching distance of me until they outgrew their moses baskets because, like you, I just wanted to latch them on as quickly as possible and go back to sleep.

BTW ladies, it's actually LESS disturbing for your other half if you have the baby next to you. You wake up as soon as the baby so much as snuffles and can latch them on before they have a chance to even cry (whereas they'd have to cry loud enough to wake you - and OH - from another room).

My S-i-L's both slept in a bedroom with their children with their partners in another...(not in the same house, obviously)

 

[Redshoes]

NO job is harder than bringing up a child, and rarely does ANY mother get to 'sleep through' and not be woke up EVERY night Sorry, but bugger the OH's and waking them up My OH still sleeps through most of LO's stirring and waking anyway, I hear many men are deaf to baby cries

I think do what's right for YOU and your LO, not what's 'ideal' for OH I personally couldn't imagine putting my newborn in ANY room but the one I'm in, you could always get a bed for the nursery and sleep in there with LO.

Very best wishes

 

[Rachx]

My little one only stayed 2 nights with us i had a motion mat and sensor watsit and he went straight in cot after that he slept 8 hrs from bein 7 weeks old and 12/13 from being 15 weeks old though my house is hobbit sized so didnt have to walk faar to get him

 

I just had to say that I love your sparkly, "Dorothy" shoes, Redshoes! I always wanted a pair when I was younger and even now, I still love glittery things

 

[lisa&alex]

No, I agree with you, Josephine-Beth, and I'm glad that you've shown that there's still a bit of latent feminism left in what's quickly becoming Stepford-wife country!

And that old phrase that he [the partner] 'puts food on the table' - well, try and go without a partner when you have children to test that archaic statement. In the present, in this country, fortunately, we still manage to eat (even if we don't have partners)! But of course that's only thanks to maintenance, tax credits and child benefit. And yes, I know of at least one contributer's views on here about single mothers (as she's already so kindly told us) and I just hope that she doesn't find herself in that position herself one day....

Sadly, there isn't yet a "salary" for being a mum and, until there is, none of us should feel like a cow for being sanctimonious for being woken at 4am

Sorry, Josephine-Beth, for manilpulating what you said to have a dig at our so-called Stepford counterparts (and I await the backlash with glee, ladies!): I know you were only having a light-hearted moan, really. I just think that some of the more, ahem, "opinionated" contributers on here should stop and engage brain before typing sometimes or at least try and pretend to be more diplomatic/tactful at times because I really don't like having to add to their animosity by responding like this.

But then 'opinions are like [you know what], we all have one'.

are you talking about me in this quote?