Anyone else in their 40s?

[Melly41]

Hello and welcome casey! im 41 and ttc #3. Have 11 and 9 year old. Been ttc since november properly. My af arrived today after being 3 days late so i was dissapointed! My cycles are usually around 24-26 days but was 28 this time so not sure whats going on! There are a few of us over 40s here and its been great to hear from some that have gone onto conceive and have healthy pregnancies. Hope your journey ttc is a short one.

 

[Casey]

Hi Melly

Thank you for the welcome.How lovely to hear from someone that has been trying for the amount of time.

I understand the frustration that comes after the arrival of a late AF! I'm trying to take a new approach and focus on the things that I can control, mainly my health - a decision that I only literally arrived a couple of days ago - I've googled vegetarian diet for TTC, and looking at increasing exercise. I need to start to meditate of something along those lines to help me to chill out a little!

Wishing you luck

 

[Syd43]

Hi Casey and welcome.

I've just turned 45 and have been trying for almost two years, two miscarriages in the past 7 months and one failed round of IVF. Most of the ladies on this thread have been trying for well over two years but it does vary. We're probably going to keep going til the summer and then call it a day.

Hope things happen quickly for you.

Actually, just to add something to that. One lovely lady, papermoon, fell pregnant very quickly and now has a beautiful boy. I'm sure she won't mind me mentioning that

 

[Papermoon]

Hi Casey welcome! Glad you can join us. Don't give up hope, it CAN happen. I conceived my son naturally at age 47! I turned 48 in December, a month before he was born. He was born healthy and normal and I had a normal healthy uncomplicated pregnancy. So don't give up, it CAN happen.

 

[Papermoon]

Hi Casey and welcome.

I've just turned 45 and have been trying for almost two years, two miscarriages in the past 7 months and one failed round of IVF. Most of the ladies on this thread have been trying for well over two years but it does vary. We're probably going to keep going til the summer and then call it a day.

Hope things happen quickly for you.

Actually, just to add something to that. One lovely lady, papermoon, fell pregnant very quickly and now has a beautiful boy. I'm sure she won't mind me mentioning that

No I don't mind at all Syd! Thanks!

 

[Syd43]

Sorry, I've just read back over my post and realised it sounds very negative regarding most people trying for more than 2 years. I didn't mean that to sound negative about those of us over 40 trying to get pregnant. I was more trying to give you an overview of the group I think.

 

[Melly41]

Morning girls.....Syd, I don't think you sounded negative. Unfortunately, this is the reality and it does take longer to conceive in your 40's, with the exception of the lucky few, which continue to provide hope to us! Fingers crossed our journey girls wont be much longer x

 

[Casey]

Hi Syd and Papermoon

Thank you for the welcome - Syd you didn't sound negative at all, please don't worry. And it's lovely to hear your storey Papermoon - I had noticed it on the thread - it's completely wonderful!

My GP conceived #2 at 43 by accident! She's been fantastic and has suggested that we both have investigations so that we know where we stand. We may also have a fertility MOT privately - it's a bit of a cost but I think it would be good to know sooner rather than later.

Syd - I'm really sorry to hear that your journey hasn't been easy, I really hope that you reach a good outcome

Thank you all for the welcome - it's such an emotive subject that can be all consuming, it's nice to know that there are other out who understand

I'm keeping my fingers crossed for all on the thread.

 

[lillith112]

Sorry, just realised I never updated, BFN was confirmed. Had a much ligher than usual AF and trying naturally this month so in the tww. Had a random bleed at 3dpo, just the once, I hear that ovulation bleeding is not uncommon after failed IVF.

Hope everyone else is ok.

Nikkers - any news?

Clementine - did you decide to go ahead with IVF? How did the meeting go?

Papermoon - how are you and TJ?

Staces and Sunflower, I also have that issue around dtd at the right time, we're basically only managing once a month at the moment, I managed to time it fairly perfectly this month but the stress in those few days is immense. I also had my birthday yesterday, 45... Reckon I'll give it til the summer and then give up on the idea.

Staces, hope everything is ok with you, did you manage to enjoy your birthday?

Lil, not sure if you're still using the forum but hope all is ok with you and OH.

Syd I am still here lurking, I don't post much anymore. Me and OH haven't even been able to ttc this year yet due to things always cropping up his end. My Dr did 2 lots of 21 bloods, one showed that I didn't ovulate but the other showed I did which was good news, although my progesterone was on borderline low side. I had a super ovulation on Monday gone, 3 days of ewcm, ovary pain on left then few hours later on the right, unfortunately OH didn't get here until the Tuesday so it was too later. I was devastated but what can I do. We are giving it until August then giving up as I turn 45 and it will be over 2 and a half years trying.

I read about your failed ivf Syd, I'm so sorry it didn't work out for you. ��
xx

 

[Nicky78]

Hi ladies, thought I'd say hello!

I'm 39, started trying for our 2nd baby early January this year. My daughters coming up to 3 in April. Worried now I've left it to late to have baby number 2 ��

 

[Melly41]

Hi Nicky, there are few ladies that have conceived in their 40s that post on the forum. I'm 41 and ttc #3. Been trying for 5 months....maybe 3 more seriously. I have been temping for last two cycles to get an idea of when I ovulate as my cycles aphave varied between 23-28 days since ttc. Good luck with you journey in ttc, I hope it isn't a short one!

 

[miamia]

Mackmummy- keep my fingers crossed. Good luck x

 

[Nicky78]

4 days until I'm due on and really trying to hold back and not do a test just yet.....

 

[stacesl3]

Hi ladies, hope everyone is well. Not really coming on here much nowadays, just lurk from time to time. I've actually had quite a lot going on lately so my focus hasn't been entirely on TTC (for once!).
I pretty much said I would give myself until May, although honestly it kills me to give up as its not in my nature to admit defeat especially after 4 years or so!!!

CD4 today, actually thought I was i with a good chance as timing for once was spot on. I'm still taking the vitamins etc, i stopped acupuncture and reflexology, didn't feel either was benefitting me...although may have been due to the actual practitioner, still tempted to give acupuncture one last try perhaps?!? guess it cant hurt...

xx

 

[Syd43]

Hi Staces, hope everything that's going on is good stuff.

I pretty much said May too, if I conceive in May I would just about give birth before I turn 46. Tried naturally the two months since my IVF failed and nothing, expecting cd1 today or tomorrow. Back in the UK this month so doing an unmedicated IUI. If nothing by the summer then I'll probably have one last go at an IUI since I'll be back in the UK again and that really will have to be it then. Don't really know how to get my head around never being a mum.

The last couple of months my pre-AF spotting has gone back up from 3ish days to 6, could be a result of the IVF but also I'm thinking it could be because I'm not having reflexology or acupuncture now that I live in Hong Kong. I've set up appointments for both now I'm back in the UK, I really did feel like they reduced my spotting and generally gave me a "tune-up".

I would give acupuncture one last go if it was me, can't hurt, as you say, is there another practitioner you can go to?

Hope everyone else is well.

 

[stacesl3]

Hey Syd, yes it will be very hard to give up, that longing to be a mum will never go away.
What exactly is unmedicated IUI?? sorry I am clueless when it comes to these things.... lol?!?
Yes I found somewhere for acupuncture about 5-10 up the road from me, she also runs a fertility clinic, so have made an appointment for tomorrow evening, hopefully I can benefit from it this time. x

 

[Syd43]

That sounds ideal, let us know how it goes.

It's just a regular iui but I'm not taking any fertility medication. They'll monitor me with scans then around ovulation they'll basically do an artificial insemination, they have my partners sperm frozen. You can do an iui with fertility medication so you end up ovulating more than one egg but I just want to try naturally since I'm not with OH this month.

 

[Clementine]

Hi everyone just dropping by to catch up, lots of luck Syd with this cycle, FX you are sprinkled with baby dust , did the clinic check your OH's sperm sample for mobility, motility, count and DNA fragmentation.

Staces hope the acupuncture helps & hopefully a good egg meets a strong sperm for you before May, you so deserve your rainbow baby

I don't come on PF as much these days as Im slowly closing the door now that we're not TTC anymore. It's the hardest thing to get my head around and I find the grief associated with losing my 4 angel babies is only hitting me now, before this I always thought my Rainbow baby would come, now that I have to accept that is not the case it's making me sad & I'm normally a positive person. For the first time ever I feel old (I know I'm not young but I feel disappointed that I didn't achieve what I wanted and normally in the past if I put my mind to something I could do it, it's like my body has said you're officially old. Sorry for the rant ! Also I think the universe is having a laugh, over the 4 years TTC every time I booked a holiday away with my DH I'd end up having my period - it was never my fertile time. Last October was the first time our holiday coincided with ovulation and although we had stopped trying last March we decided not to use protection & I ended up pregnant but then had the MC. Since then we have avoided full sex from CD7 until day after ovulation (cd16) so pretty much no sex for 9 days as neither of us likes condoms, it's a royal pain in the arse as we were lucky enough to enjoy a good sex life up to now. Back in January I booked to go away in May for 10nights & surprise surprise we're going to be away from CD8 to CD18 !!!! I have taken the pill for years in the past but it always caused me to have bad anxiety and also my sister who is 12yrs older than me had breast cancer so I'm not happy pumping hormones into myself. I know my DH will say let's throw caution to the wind but I honestly don't feel I would cope if I ended up having another MC so I just don't want to take any chances getting pregnant (I never thought I would feel like that). Anyways enough moaning from me, I still believe in miracles and in the logic "that what's for you doesn't pass you" so I'm wishing each of you buckets filled with baby dust xxx

 

[Syd43]

Blueflower I'm so glad you've posted, I've been thinking about you. So sorry it's not with good news though. I just don't know how to cope with that door finally shutting so I don't have any words of wisdom for you at all but just wanted you to know that you're often on my mind. Would love to be able to say "just go with it and see what happens" but completely understand why you don't feel you can do that.

X

 

[Macbeth77]

Hi everyone

It's nice to read about people in the same situation as us with ttc. Thank you for sharing.

I am 39, almost 40 with a 52 (going on 30) year old hubby. We are ttc #2. We had a 3 month frenzy last year and then hubbies back went (happily not while dtd, can't imagine how he would have explained that to the doctor 😂&#128514 anyway we put TTC out of our minds for the 4 months it took for him to feel human again and kind of had it on the back burner. This year we have moved due to hubby's job and it's the last move so we started ttc properly back in February. I didn't think I would be too bothered if it happened or not but the last 2 AF's have disappointed me. I think I am going to turn into a series POAS person 😂 I thought as I started Pregnacare 3 months ago and last cycle I had Ewcm like you wouldn't believe then we were onto a good thing but AF appeared 2 days early so that was the end of that.

I had a chat with the new GP as my last period (last week) was 2 days early and although lasted 3 days it wasn't its normal self. I was in at the GP about something else and mentioned it and said hopefully I wasn't pre-menaposal. Her response was if it keeps happening come back in 3 months. She said could I be pregnant and I said we haven't used contraception for 16 years and only have a 13 year old and a miscarriage to show for our dtd but had the opportunity to travel we didn't investigate and assumed we weren't fertile people. She said your not pregnant then, but buy an otc test and check then if it keeps happening come back in 3 months. Ha ha she was brilliant....lol....

Hubby is very if it happens it happens but very broody, I'm too impatient i'm set to march back to GP and demand probing or at least a blood test but hubby doesn't think it's an issue and will happen!! Told him we aren't waiting until he will hit the Guinness book of records as the oldest dad 😂 Anyway I will wait 3 months and see what happens. This month has just been a new record of my body throwing everything in the mix. Early period, cramping for 3 weeks, no Ewcm though due to ovulate and today now some spotting which I assume is ovulation spotting but OPK says no!! I normally have a 25 day cycle but think my early had knocked everything off course this month. Urgh!!

On a positive note my sister however did fall pregnant 4 years ago at the age of 42 after many miscarriages so miracles do happen. They have an adorable little boy.