Anyone else in their 40s?

[Sunflower1]

Oh interesting, thanks!

 

[stacesl3]

Thankyou ladies, losses are hard for anyone but even harder when you are in your 40's as you know time isn't on your side

As for vitamins etc.... pretty much had it all lol. I also take ubiqinol as read so many good things about it. I take the Zita West pregnancy plan multivits (can take for tcc and pregnancy) as they were recommended by my acupunturist, and Zita West Vital DHA which is omega 3 (didn't realise how important this was to ttc!), oh and been taking low dose asprin for a while now, was reccomended to take after my misscarriage. Started reflexology in May and also acupuncture last month! All i can say is this TTC business is bloody expensive!!

Just out of curiosity does everyone here have a pretty regular cycle?Do you ovulate the same each month?

 

[Sunflower1]

I've heard acupuncture is really effective. Reflexology is sooo nice!

My cycle is fairly regular now that I have lost a lot of weight - about 26-28 days and I think I ovulate between days 13 and 15. You'd think that would help me get pregnant but not yet.

I was having cycles between 21 days (bleeding for 15 of those) and 35 days. I think the weight loss and the nutritional stuff has helped.

 

[Syd43]

You're not wrong about how expensive it is! Add the ridiculous amount of vitamins I take to regular reflexology and acupuncture and it's crazy each month. I decided before I got pregnant in July that as vitamins ran out I would stop re-ordering them and just stick to a pre-natal plus ubiquinol but now I find I can't give any of them up...

My cycles are regular - used to be 29-32 days but I think the combination of reflexology and acupuncture has evened me out even more at 29 or 30 days, based mainly on opks, occasional temping and occasional ovulation pains I always seem to ovulate around day 15, occasionally day 14.

Because I got pregnant in July literally the first time of having sex after my fibroid removal I can't help thinking that had something to do with it. I'll be with OH again in November and part of me is convinced I'll get pregnant naturally again which really is ridiculous. Whilst the fibroid removal may have helped, getting pregnant twice in quick succession at my age is highly unlikely, especially as oh's sex drive is so low. He's under masses of stress at the moment, I can imagine not being able to dtd at all around my next ovulation. How's that for a mixture of pma plus utter despair!

 

[Sunflower1]

Syd, actually I read that the stats for getting pregnant after a miscarriage are good...apparently you have a higher likelihood of a 2nd pregnancy. Not sure why, maybe it's because your body has shown it can do it. Also lots of women have a miscarriage or two and then go on to have healthy pregnancies...don't lose hope. I haven't had a miscarriage but I can imagine how emotionally hard it must be.

I really get about the low sex drive. We are really struggling to dtd around ovulation as my OH is stressed and exhausted. I know how frustrating and difficult that is. My OH takes high strength zinc and it makes a huge difference to him...he takes it with folic acid as that helps absorption. We aim for every other day about 3 times around the fertile window if we are lucky. This month it was one. The rest of the month I mostly let him rest. Anything you can do to get him to relax and take the pressure off.

 

[stacesl3]

My cycle can vary between 25-30 days and I OV around CD11-14, was hoping acupuncture treatment would regulate my cycles but hasn't so far, last month I had a 30 day cycle and OV'd around day 14 and this month I've ovulated on CD12! My acupuncturist is on holiday, so my next appt not till next week, might have a word with her about it, dont seem to get much feedback.

Syd, you never know could happen, keep my FX for you x

11DPO for me today, not due AF until Sat so still feel like I have ages yet.....

 

[Syd43]

How many acupuncture sessions have you had Staces?

Sunflower I have heard that, we shall see I guess. Unfortunately the things that are causing oh's stress really are awful things that are happening at the moment that we have no control over and it's an ongoing situation. I feel terrible adding ttc pressure but there's literally no time left I wouldn't get every other day out of him on a good month... It's why I get so much more stressed around ovulation rather than the tww.

 

[Sunflower1]

How many acupuncture sessions have you had Staces?

Sunflower I have heard that, we shall see I guess. Unfortunately the things that are causing oh's stress really are awful things that are happening at the moment that we have no control over and it's an ongoing situation. I feel terrible adding ttc pressure but there's literally no time left I wouldn't get every other day out of him on a good month... It's why I get so much more stressed around ovulation rather than the tww.

Really sorry you're both having to go through so much stress as well as TTC. That doesn't help. I can relate to the time pressure...it gets scary in your 40s doesn't it? Sending you lots of good wishes.

 

[stacesl3]

How many acupuncture sessions have you had Staces?

Sunflower I have heard that, we shall see I guess. Unfortunately the things that are causing oh's stress really are awful things that are happening at the moment that we have no control over and it's an ongoing situation. I feel terrible adding ttc pressure but there's literally no time left I wouldn't get every other day out of him on a good month... It's why I get so much more stressed around ovulation rather than the tww.

I've had 5 so far, started at the beginning of August and had my last one on the 7th Sept. She's on holiday until next week now (very inconsiderate! lol) so next one not until next Wednesday. After my 4th one she said I could go to twice weekly (was doing them weekly). Thats why i decided to start up reflexology again, so im now having that the week I dont have acupunture.
x

I hear you with the stress around OV time

 

[Syd43]

Hate when they do that, shouldn't go on holiday til we're pregnant!

Hopefully the day 12 ov was just a slight glitch and it'll even out at day 14 again. My acupuncturist makes it her mission to get me ovulating on day 14, which she mostly manages, and to have a day 28 cycle, which hasn't happened yet.

 

[stacesl3]

I know, thought it was most inconsiderate of her!

Ovulating on CD12 is pretty normal for me, I have had a couple of cycles where I ov'd on CD11 (Thats if i did ovulate of course?) I think I will chat to her next week and see what she says. How long have you been going? Do you have moxibustion?

 

[Syd43]

She has done that occasionally, I like it, lovely and warm

I started seeing her in April, I try and go every week but there are big chunks I have missed due to travel. For instance I was out of the UK for 6 weeks over the summer. I started reflexology a year ago but same thing, manage every 2-3 weeks when I'm in the UK. My acupuncturist prefers new fertility clients to commit to weekly appointments for a certain period of time. She does have amazing success rates.

 

[Clementine]

Can I join this thread please I'm 44 will be 45 this December, was TtC from July 2012 to March 2016, I got pregnant twice over this time but had two missed miscarriages with a single & a twin pregnancy.
We decided to stop trying back in March as I got worried that the risk of a baby with a medical issue was too high, however I have stayed on the forum, it's like my heart can't close the door. My hubbie is 2 years younger than me & always imagined he would be a Dad. Not sure what our next step is ... maybe try again a few more times starting next month .... maybe do Ivf with either my eggs or donor eggs (though clinics in Ireland only allow using your own eggs up to 45th B'day .... maybe try and accept the decision I made back in March.
I've had my hormones checked twice over last 6 months results good Day 21 progesterone 46 and 44
Fish oestradiol LSH all good on Day 3, think I'm ovulating today but last 6 cycles we've used protection / avoided Day 10 to Day 16 as I ovulate Day14 or Day 15, it's been so crap not trying
Sorry for the rambling post xx

 

[Sunflower1]

Hi Clementine, of course you're welcome to join this thread. I'm so sorry for your miscarriages. That must have been a really hard decision to stop trying. Sounds like you are still in the process of working out what to do. Hugs x

 

[Syd43]

Hi Clementine.

Have you explored IVF abroad as they have longer age limits? I've heard of a couple that have great reviews but the one that comes up over and over again on every different forum or group I belong to is Serum in Athens. They're supposed to have great success rates and just be a really amazing clinic, everyone raves about Penny, the clinic director. I don't know what IVF costs are like in Ireland but I know going into Europe it is way cheaper than the UK.

 

[stacesl3]

She has done that occasionally, I like it, lovely and warm

I started seeing her in April, I try and go every week but there are big chunks I have missed due to travel. For instance I was out of the UK for 6 weeks over the summer. I started reflexology a year ago but same thing, manage every 2-3 weeks when I'm in the UK. My acupuncturist prefers new fertility clients to commit to weekly appointments for a certain period of time. She does have amazing success rates.

I dont mind it, although its got a little close at times Does she put a needle in afterwards? (like puts it in and out again). I was happy to do it once a week esp for the first 6 weeks but after 4 she said my pulse was always good so we could do fornightly now....

 

[stacesl3]

Can I join this thread please I'm 44 will be 45 this December, was TtC from July 2012 to March 2016, I got pregnant twice over this time but had two missed miscarriages with a single & a twin pregnancy.
We decided to stop trying back in March as I got worried that the risk of a baby with a medical issue was too high, however I have stayed on the forum, it's like my heart can't close the door. My hubbie is 2 years younger than me & always imagined he would be a Dad. Not sure what our next step is ... maybe try again a few more times starting next month .... maybe do Ivf with either my eggs or donor eggs (though clinics in Ireland only allow using your own eggs up to 45th B'day .... maybe try and accept the decision I made back in March.
I've had my hormones checked twice over last 6 months results good Day 21 progesterone 46 and 44
Fish oestradiol LSH all good on Day 3, think I'm ovulating today but last 6 cycles we've used protection / avoided Day 10 to Day 16 as I ovulate Day14 or Day 15, it's been so crap not trying
Sorry for the rambling post xx

I'm still rooting for you its hard to know what to do for the best, we've been doing this for so long now its so hard to just give up....xx

 

[Clementine]

Hi Clementine.

Have you explored IVF abroad as they have longer age limits? I've heard of a couple that have great reviews but the one that comes up over and over again on every different forum or group I belong to is Serum in Athens. They're supposed to have great success rates and just be a really amazing clinic, everyone raves about Penny, the clinic director. I don't know what IVF costs are like in Ireland but I know going into Europe it is way cheaper than the UK.

Hi Syd
All IVF in Ireland is done privately it starts at around Euro4500 for standard IVF with own eggs, but goes up sharply in price if you get embryo testing and can go up to approx Euro11,000 for IVF with donor eggs where the donor agrees to be known when the baby is 18. If using donor eggs I think I would want the baby to have the option of knowing who provided the egg (my husband isn't a fan of using donor eggs as he really wanted it to be mine & his baby)
Sarah (Febnet) is expecting twins and she used Serum in Athens, she said Penny was brilliant. I'm self employed and have clients booked 6 to 12 months ahead so my big issue is getting the time to go, but where there is a will there is always a way...... there was a brilliant documentary on about IVF in Ireland last month, but it sorta scared me as one couple spent nearly€100,000 before finally having a little boy using donor eggs in a clinic in the States, they were thrilled with their little boy but you could see the toll the journey had taken on the Mum.
My biggest concern about IVF is the drugs my sister is 12 years older than me and had breast cancer at 50 which required a double mastectomy so I'm worried the drugs could have a negative impact on me, also for some reason anytime I was on the pill in the past it gives me bad anxiety (I had taken Yasmin)
I overthink everything, I always had great faith and believed that things would work out. Back 4 years ago I really thought we'd be blessed with a healthy baby, now I feel I was naive in my thinking. Since my Dad passed away at the end of May a number of family and friends suggested we should try again as Dad could "put a word in for us with the man above" but now part of me just thinks that's silly as logically the stats say that I have less than a 2% chance of having a healthy baby naturally, the thoughts of having a baby with a severe medical condition due to maybe my egg quality really scares me.
I have always been able to achieve things that I really wanted and this feels like the first situation that is totally outside my control. I wish I had been wise and frozen my eggs in my 20's as I never imagined I would be 39 when I finally met the man who is my soulmate.

 

[Syd43]

I'm so sorry Clementine, it's crap Even though I wasn't ready for children until my 30s I always knew I wanted them and truly didn't think I just wouldn't meet the right man. It feels so unfair. I completely understand your fear around the drugs, has there been any study or such like that suggests a link with the drugs and health issues further down the line for the mother? I know it's pretty horrible stuff to be pumping into yourself. I'm sorry about your sister, that must have been so tough. There is a clinic in London that offers a more "natural" IVF route, I think it's Create? Not sure if they have clinics elsewhere. Being self-employed definitely makes it tricky, is it the type of job that can be done from any location, ie could you still work, in theory, whilst in Greece or wherever for a few weeks? Or do you need to be in Ireland as you meet clients?

The dilemma I have now is do I want to put myself and oh through this, as you say, I think it often takes a huge toll. He's said he'll do it but honestly, he's only really doing it for me not because it's what he wants to do and I'm not sure that will be enough to get us through. I also am terribly afraid of having a baby with multiple issues due to my eggs. We already have a very complicated set-up for a variety of reasons, bringing a child with multiple special needs into that situation would be extremely difficult. Obviously there are no guarantees and if it happened we would deal with it but I know I would blame myself for pushing something that should have been left alone.

Having said all that, the last thing I want is to turn 50 and look back and think I didn't try everything to become a mum. I'm terrified of having regrets, I'm just not sure which set of regrets would be worse!

Oh to have a crystal ball.

 

[stacesl3]

I'd rather a time machine so I could go back 10 years and start TTC then!!!