am i over reacting?

[cherelle]

Well, basically since me and my OH got our bfp approx 13 weeks ago he doesnt want sex anymore! Before the pregnancy we both had high sex drives and our sex life was good and now im struggling to feel loved and desired because he has no interest in sex!


We talked about it and he said hes sorry but it just doesnt feel right, he said he'd even noticed in one of my pregnancy books that it does say either male or females can go off sex during pregnancy and that he cant help it but personally i feel its because ive got a bump and some love handles and ive gone from a size 8-10 to a big 12

Im not sure what to do - i dont even feel like im in a relationship atm and i know the little time we get together when neither of us is working is spoilt because im always thinking about it and making comments about it! x


.... phew! needed that rant!!

 

[Sam's Mum]

It's so common for men to feel quite uncomfortable about sex while their partners are pregnant, and nothing to do with how we look but because they're aware that there's a baby in there. I know I'd be upset too though - have you told him how you feel? Even if he is uncomfortable it shouldn't mean you can't have any physical contact at all while you're pregnant! x

 

[FebMum2Be]

I think it's completely natural for either partner to go off sex at some stage during the pregnancy, me and OH also have v high sex drives but in my second tri I didn't want it at all.. I think men are in some ways afraid of "hurting" the baby.. Have you told me how it's making you feel unloved? X

 

[cherelle]

yes i have spoken to him about it but hes made it clear that he doesnt want to do anything sexual at all, and i would hate to think he was doing something he didnt want to just to keep me happy.

We still hug and stuff but even when we kiss its not the same, its like every tiny bit of passion he had had vanished!! So frustrating

 

[positivity :)]

hey hun, sorry to hear this! i do agree with the other ladies, its probably he is worried about hurting the baby or something, i'm 100% sure its not becuase of your change in weight. also, its still quite early on and he may still be getting used to the whole pregnancy thing?

i hope its not upsetting you too much. try to have lots of hugs and kisses, hopefully it will help a bit and in time he will come around, like most men im sure he won't want to go too long without it lol! xxx

 

[cherelle]

thanks positivity, yeah i guess its just a waiting game now really lol.

Weve actually had a nice weekend together this weekend so im feeling a bit better about things. I hope youre ok? x

 

[jennilisanne]

We stopped for a long time, we both didn't really feel up for it. I felt really bad cos I thought it was just me, but after a talk, it's both of us! I'm sure things will go back to normal soon!

 

[flexilexi394]

hey! i think it is pretty normal. i was just reading a book actually and it said a lot of men are generally put off by it. Dont think my OH was so much, it was more me. but i am back to loving sex! lol! my friends OH tells her how sexy she looks with a bump and stuff, i think thats so sweet! ive had some pretty rude comments from my OH like how are you whale? and stuff like that, which is all meant to be very funny but i dont find it too funny, lol. maybe in time he will go back to it and stuff. xx

 

[PixieBlossom]

My DH was exactly the same when I was pregnant.

I know it's hard but try not to take it too personally

Me & my DH more than made up for it after the little one arrived

 

[cherelle]

thanks pixie thats nice to hear! And lexi thats awful him making fun if it makes you feel bad - have you told him how you feel? x

 

[cherelle]

yaaaaaay!!! i finally got it yesterday!!!

 

[Sol]

My other half was exactly the same too we didn't do until i was like 16 weeks cause he was scared he would hurt the baby. Completley natural I would say but he's over it now

 

[Skysara]

Count yourself lucky mines been like a dog on heat!! Make the most of it lol.