This isn't Happening!!! When did it happen for you?

[KarolinaMoon]

Waiting to M/C naturally, am now nearing 12 weeks, and all I have is very very very slight cramp, so slight that I'm not sure if I am just imagining it!! Had very slight bleeding last night and this morning, but nothing all day. Is'nt it awful willing a miscarraige to happen??!!!! I have even been trying to excercise lots on cross trainer at home, as I heard excercise can speed things along.....but worried I'll do myself damage!!! I know that I may not be able to avoid surgery even if I do miscarry naturally, just would like to try to do my best to avoid it first!
Until this happened to me, I never really knew the turmoil a woman who miscarries experiences.....the only idea I had was based on a termination I had 10 years ago. Definitely not the same!!
I had my first scan last Monday, and it's now been a week, and still little sign of this happening naturally! I'll soon be in what would be the 2nd trimester if this pregnancy had been successful.
Could this actually go on weeks and weeks if I left it? What is everyones experiences of waiting it out and letting it happen naturally?

Carolina xxx

 

[lisey27]

Hi,

I'm so sorry to hear that you are going through this. I miscarried naturally recently, I bled a week before and a week after. I had a scan at the end of the 2nd week to confirm that everything had come away and it had. Have you got a scan booked to check this for you? I'm sure that when you have this, they will give you further options. I understand what you mean about willing it to happen, I was the same, just wanted it to be over with as the wait is just heartbreaking. xx

 

[netty]

i was 13 weeks hen i had my scan and baby had died at 10 weeks so my body had missed it for 3 weeks, i then took another week to MC i would go back to hospital if you are waiting longer as you may need some help passing everything xx so sorry xxx its a hard time if you are going to MC naturally get some painkillers too

 

[KarolinaMoon]

I had a second scan last thursday, and have another one on wednesday!!! On the second one, the sac had gone crescent shaped, kinda like it was collapsing. With first scan they didnt see a fetus or yolk sac, just a gestational sac. With the second one, the midwife thought there was a 5 and a half week fetal pole, or the beginnings of a baby....so things failed quite early on with me, but my body kept growing the gestational sac! So really it has been over 5 weeks at least since when the pregnancy failed. The slight bleeding was a bit of encouragement to me, as up until then I had nothing. I did have a very slight brown discharge early on at around 5 weeks, and thought this was normal as it wasn't like full on bleeding. Looking back now, even that slight bit of bleeding early on was a bad sign for me.
I would much rather M/C naturally, really dont like hospitals etc...but know that I maybe wont have a choice!!!
xxx

 

[kanga86]

Hey Hun, I mc'ed naturally a week and a half after my first scan at 12+4 weeks but my bean stopped growing around 5 and a half weeks, so 7 weeks in total after my bean stopped. I then bled for 9 weeks after and ended up with a erpc op. So I would recommend not waiting for it to happen but get help whether it be a medical management or the op. xx

 

[CARNAT22]

Hey hun,

I've posted on a few of your threads (so forgive me for repeating myself!)

My M/C took 3 weeks to occur, although I know that the fetus was still 'developing' for at least two if these weeks [I did also know that it was not developing in the right way]

Luckily I did have a natual M/C - and it occured at home over a Bank Holiday weekend.

I def agree that you should speak to your EPU and see if they can fit you in a little earlier?

Waiitng for me was the most awful part of the whole shitty experience.

Best of luck

xxxxxxxxxx

 

[Dragonfly Fi]

I am confused, when i was prompted to deliver my baby, they gave me a pill and i had to wait 48 hours for them to induce labour... why when you have a miscarriage can they not just give you that pill? It was enough to start my labour off actually (although they did induce me further to speed things up)

surely that would be better than waiting for weeks and weeks for something to occur, or going straight in with a D+C??

 

[KarolinaMoon]

Hi Ladies,

Thanks for sharing your experiences with me I am going to see M/W again tomorrow, and will ask to book in then for a D & C, but it may be a week or two before they can fit me in. It has been my choice to wait it out, I would much much rather this happens naturally, and much as a horrible wait I know it is, I was willing to give it a go. I have still only had very very slight brown discharge. Last night I was getting some stabbing type pains, but no cramps. At least my body is now recognising the pregnancy is no more and is trying to do something!

I hope you are all doing ok?

xxxx

 

[BabyBrain]

I am confused, when i was prompted to deliver my baby, they gave me a pill and i had to wait 48 hours for them to induce labour... why when you have a miscarriage can they not just give you that pill? It was enough to start my labour off actually (although they did induce me further to speed things up)

surely that would be better than waiting for weeks and weeks for something to occur, or going straight in with a D+C??

I agree totally, to me it seems cruel to leave women hanging on so long, surely there should be at least a cut off time? I know that the subject of treatment of women who have miscarried is in the news at the moment so hopefully things will change for the better soon.
Am thinking of and praying for you all xxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[netty]

i was gutted i had to wait a week knowing my baby had died it was terrible i felt like i wanted to die myself. It should be immeadiate treatment i think its distressing enough as it is without it being dragged out

 

[Dragonfly Fi]

I think thats atrocious guys!! The day i sat there waiting to be induce was frikken awful! Knowing that i had a dead baby inside me!!

Nightmare to have to go through that any longer. They give you drugs for you to abort a child so why not to help you when you have had a mis-carriage, they do the same bloody thing!! (i know because i asked and they said the drug they gave me was like the first pill they give as a chemical abortion but much, much stronger)

I feel for you all i really do xx

 

[CARNAT22]

I can see both sides - personally after having 6 internal scans and being told each time 'it's not going to last BUT it is still there' I didn't want to set another foot in the frigging EPU after I did actually miscarry. [in the end I did for a scan to confirm everything had 'passed' but I did not want any medical treatement]

I was actually thankful that it happened naturally. BUT how much longer could I have coped with the not knowing and the waiting for the inevitable? I was scared every day that I'd start gushing blood at work or keel over on the Tube... It was truly horrible not knowing and not having any control.

Yet my body did what it needed to and it happened overnight, in my own home, with my OH looking after me... So I am 50/50. I totally get why someone would want to wait for nature to do it's job but I also support a woman's right to choose - if she wants to hurry things along then she should be able to.

BigBump, obviously your situation was very different hun, and you needed that medical help.

 

[KarolinaMoon]

Hey all,

I think everyone is different, everyone's experience is different, and only you know what is right for you! I just would rather give nature a chance, but then in different circumstances, maybe if I had been further along, I most probably would take the medical route. Ofcourse, in the end no matter what, I know I may not really have a choice, and the only option for my own safety will maybe be a D & C.
I'm bleeding a little more now, I'm hoping nature will take it's course....
Really feel for everyone here who has gone through and is going through a M/C.....none of the three choices to manage a m/c are pleasant, and it is a difficult individual choice to make esp after being told the horrible news!

xxxx

 

[Dragonfly Fi]

Oh yeah i am not trying to compare to what happen to me... i had an 8 hour labour and delivery...bit different to a miscarrriage but as far as i know, if you have an abortion you get given the pills and then go home anyway? Why cant it be the same for early mis-carriage?

 

[CARNAT22]

Oh yeah i am not trying to compare to what happen to me... i had an 8 hour labour and delivery...bit different to a miscarrriage but as far as i know, if you have an abortion you get given the pills and then go home anyway? Why cant it be the same for early mis-carriage?

I meant that what happened to you was awful hun and that there was no way they could have left you to do it naturally.

From all I have read on here I think women that miscarry are treated like crap.

Although my own exprience was pretty OK and I felt well looked after and cared for - well as much as you can when you are being internally scanned and told at any given time you are going to no longer be pregnant

 

[KarolinaMoon]

Hi BB & Carnat

Medical management is one of the options given for early m/c. I was given a leaflet with the options following the first scan, but at that point, no one discussed them with me, I was just given another appointment for a few days time. When I went to my second appointment, I assumed they would be aware I was a M/C case at the early pregnancy assessment centre....was horrified when the M/W started taking all my details again, when my last period was etc....and had no idea I had been given the awful news just a few days before!!! So I had to then tell her that I'd already had my first scan and they could'nt see a live fetus! I found this upsetting. I'm not sure if they are just so busy or what, but I felt I'd been treated quite insensitively. The M/W was lovely though, there just seems to be a breakdown in communication somewhere along the lines.....treated a bit like a cattle market kinda thing!!

I was told by the M/W that with the medical management they give you a pill 48 hrs before bringing you in and giving you further pills every 3 hours. She told me there is a strong chance Id have to be kept in overnight. But everyone else I've spoken to about this said they were told they could manage it at home themselves??!!

I have another appointment tomorrow morn and I'm going to ask a few more questions....still, I would rather this happened naturally!!!

xxxx

 

[kanga86]

If u want to do it naturally hun a medical management is the closest to that and will save u from waiting knowing it is going to happen at some point. I'm sure u will ask all the questions u have tomorrow, but ask if u can do it at home like dysco did. thinking of u xx

 

[KarolinaMoon]

Hi Kanga,

Thanks, scared of possible side effect of the medical way!!! I'm going to ask loadsa questions tomorrow and try and weigh it all up in my head, having a terrible time trying to make a decision, I think I'm just all up in the air emotionally right now My Hubby reckons natural is best way to go if I can too, I know complications are rare, but still scary to read about them!!!
Will let you all know how it goes tomorrow xxxx

 

[kanga86]

I was unfortunately a rare case with mc'ing naturally which is probably why i am so against it now. As soon as I found out my bean had stopped growing at 5 weeks, and I was 11 weeks all I wanted was a dnc done, but they couldn't refer me for one just incase my dates were extremely wrong or something similar. Even though when I spoke to the nurse after the scan I was told I would mc. I hated that week and a half it took for me to mc naturally.

I think everyone deals with it differently and ur emotions are going haywire, my biggest thing about mc'ing naturally was the blood side of it as I'm not great at the best of times get real queasy. It ended up not being as bad as I anticipated though. xx

 

[Annie050408]

Hi hon,

Apologies as I've not read your history so I don't know why you don't want to have a d&c but I can tell you that I had one 2 weeks ago and it was absolutely fine - no pain at all and over so quickly. I am now able to move on straight away and I'd definitely have one again if needed (although of course I hope I won't be in that position again). x