Not sure where to post this...

[Ella1979]

I'm after some opinions, not really baby and toddler related as such, but this part of the forum gets a reasonable amount of views.

I currently work as a radiotherapist and used to love my job. Over the past few years, my brother-in-law, then my mum-in-law, then my dad all developed cancer. Now it's looking increasingly likely that my dad's cancer has spread to his bone. I'm not in the best place right now thinking about the possibility of him coming back to the department where I work to have palliative treatment. The bottom line is: I'm not sure I want to do this as a job any more. A large part of my life has always been about looking after people with chronic, serious and life-threatening illness and now my personal life is full of it too. I'm thinking I could perhaps do with a complete career change.

Is that completely mad? Is it something that I'll get through after a while and start to enjoy my job again? I just don't know. Guess I'm looking for some thoughts or advice. Any nurses or other health professionals out there who have gone through similar would be good.

Thanks in advance xx

 

[juliekim0908]

Didn't want to read and run. not a healthcare professional etc..

Im sorry your feeling this way at the moment! It's not a easy thing to get through, my mother had cancer when I was a little younger so luckily I was quite sheltered from it all, wouldn't know how I would cope if it happened again now.

Personally, if I was in your position, I'd like to think i'd get through it, especially if it's a job you've enjoyed and worked hard for and I suppose always aimed to do.

But as I havn't been in the situation that's only an opinion of what I think i'd like to do.
Would it be difficult to get into something else? and then maybe go back in the future? Just to get your mind away from it at times for now?
x

 

[MrsT2011]

Not quite the same but my job involves managing Dementia services and I've done higher education in this field as well as endless research and training. Love my job with a passion. Until my grandad got Alzheimers. It's one thing working in the environment but another thing entirely when it's your family. The only comfort I get is how useful it's been to my family and they're reassured someone knows the system. Maybe you need to look on it in a different light and see if your job can benefit your family?
It's hard to make such a big change in your life when you're going through a stressful time anyway. Maybe see if the right job comes up and leave it to fate x

 

[kumber]

Not a health professional either but I firmly believe in going on gut instinct and what would make you feel better. If you think a career change is what you need then go for it! There's nothing silly or mad about it! I would caution that it might be a lot with your family situation on top but equally it might help you take your mind off it too and give you a positive focus.

Do you have a career path in mind? If not, perhaps think of what you want to do/are qualified to do, and do a list of pros and cons?

If it helps, my mom went from a clinical profession (nurse - hv), then did an IT degree with the OU and she's now working in the IT sector of the NHS as the middle person between the clinicians and the software developers. A completely new direction in her career but she's absolutely loving it. She made this change a few years ago aged 40

I'm sorry to hear about your MIL, BILand dad, big hugs and hope you're ok

 

[Sparklisam]

The positives of your situation are is that you truly know how to sympathise and empathise with all the people you meet. Even though whilst going though it personally it will be extremely tough. I manage a disabled children's home and my brother is disabled. I use this knowledge every day to empathise and it makes me do my job much better - only in my opinion though.

I think you need to do what you think is best and what makes you happy. I'm sorry it seems your going through a tough time at the moment xxxx

 

[Ella1979]

Thanks for your replies. I know a lot of my colleagues actually went into the profession because they either lost someone or have someone close to them who had/has cancer and it makes them better at their jobs. I've always felt quite empathetic, but recently much much more so. It wasn't so bad a couple of years ago when I was talking to my BIL and Dad about radiotherapy but I think because the intent was curative I was in a much better place and felt more positive. I'm currently struggling when we get any palliative patients through and also because my parents live locally, if Dad needs any treatment it'll be at the centre where I work, so I'm dreading seeing his name appear on my list

I don't think I'd make any rash decisions. This is definitely not the right time to quit work as it wouldn't help my parents to be worrying about me too. I'm thinking long term that it might be better for me to be doing something that didn't involve cancer. Although in the next breath I'm thinking that then it feels like cancer's won again. I guess when it comes down to it I'm just really scared that I'm going to lose my dad and he's not very old and my kids won't remember him. And I'm probably trying to run away from something I can't run away from.

 

[Browneyed Girl]

Does your employer offer career breaks? Where I work staff can request a career break (unpaid) for up to 6 months. If this could work for you it might be worth contacting your HR and asking if they have a policy on this. It could give you the time out without you having to make a final decision on your current job. Not an easy situation to be in xxx