Not Sure What to do?

[frankie707]

Sorry in advance girlies as i'm not sure how understandable this will be.
George is 7 weeks now and I have no idea if I should be trying to get him into a routine, I am exclusively breast feeding on demand which is going fine now. G shows no sign of sleeping through the night (generally 3hours between feeds) and I dont know if getting him into a routine would encourage this or if he is still just too little.
Also during the daytimes he will not settle on his own at all - he will feed then we will do some awake time together and then he will get tired but not go to sleep and then he just gets over tired and the only way to settle him is to put him in the sling and bounce around the house until he finally falls asleep but I cant put him down - anyone else's LOs done this? what should I do ? DOnt want to create problems for myself by letting him do this too long and not being able to sleep on his own at all.
Is he too little still or do you think a routine would help? The thing that worries me slightly is most routines seem to involve leaving them to cry but I'm on my own so hard not to have support through that and also G seems to just work himself into a total state if left to cry.

Sorry long and rambling post but I'm just feeling unsure about what to do today.

 

[Esoames]

Isla used to be like this. I couldn't do anything all I did was feed and hold her. Gradually she has got better at falling asleep on her own, and at night she was doing between 4 and 6 hour stretches. She just did nearly 9 last night and did a 7 last week!! I think it just takes time.

She has a marathon feeding session in the evening, she seems to know that it's bedtime. I feed her from 5 until 9. Then it's bedtime.

Give him time, he's still learning xx

 

[frankie707]

Thanks its really reassuring to hear that.

 

[Esoames]

Thanks its really reassuring to hear that.

You're doing an amazing job, breastfeeding is so much hard work. I'm just starting to see the benefits. Keep smiling x

 

[Minchin]

oh just wrote a massive reply and managed to delete it, how annoying. Will try again.

Agree with ESOAMES, you're doing a brill job and breastfeeding can get tiring.

We use to swaddle lo for naps, when he busted out we found he loved sleeping on tuma nd gave him a dummy, eventually he now settles himself with a bit of shhh and patting from me. Also used to wear him in a sling loads to get him to sleep.

You're post sound sjust like me, I would worry that if I was doing something one way that meant he'd struggle to adapt to another way...

I followed a routine based on the accronym -EASY; eat, activity, sleep, you time (!!) not sure if I can post authors name? But this routine worked v well for us, he's now on a routine eating between eevry 2 and half to 4 hours. Have a look online for some info but I found it a great routine as it;s v flexible, no controlled crying and you can just adapt it to how you want to use it. Tbh Lo kinda fell into his own really I just used this to help me get my head around everything.

Hope this helps little...
x

 

[frankie707]

I've seen that EASY system referred to - think its kind of what I try to do but I will look into it a bit more - thanks girls!

 

[Amy_J]

my lo is almost 4 months and doesn't have a routine. to be honest i've given up trying as everyne has told me it will just happen when hes ready. i make sure he has a bath every day between 7 and 7.30 and try to get him in bed by 8. im also bottle feeding on demand. he takes anything from 3oz-6oz every 3-4 hours, depends on his mood, sometimes he drains 6oz other times hes just not interested!!!
id LOVE a routine and i cant wait to actually have one. well done on the bf, its not easy ( i did 8 weeks and was exhausted) you should be very proud!!!

 

[frankie707]

Thanks - hope your LO gets a routine soon

 

[Amy_J]

Thanks - hope your LO gets a routine soon

hehe me too!!!!

 

[xxbeckyxx]

I'm having the exact same dilemma Frankie, so no advice just heartfelt sympathies! Everyone I talk to just says 'oh, it'll get better soon and you'll forget how bad it was'...I just want to smack them, I'm so sleep deprived!

 

[frankie707]

Yeah everyone has such different opinions. I just don't want to do it too late and have created a rod for my own back if you know what I mean. Let's hope our lo's sleep more soon.

 

[xxbeckyxx]

Yeah I seem to give up most nights if she isn't asleep by 1-2am and just either fall asleep with her on me on the sofa or in my bed. But one of my friends has got a 3yr old who she still has to do this with, and I just don't want to get stuck like that!!

I read on the Pampers website today that you should put your LO down before they are fully asleep so they learn to fall asleep by themselves but there's no way Lizzie will do this, she'll just cry till I pick her up again!

 

[frankie707]

At the moment I'm happy to let him be mostly asleep when I put him down cos he stirs and goes back to sleep. Will start trying to put him down more and more awake over the next few weeks-we'll see how that goes.

 

[xxbeckyxx]

Have you tried a dummy? I used one this morning and lizzie took herself off to sleep! Only for about half an hour, but still an achievement lol!

 

[frankie707]

i'm trying to avoid using a dummy at the moment but i have got a couple in the house if i think it will help.
just recieved a book from amazon which i had accidentally ordered with that one click ordering thing and flicked through it - not for me!!! I couldnt force G into a strict routine and dont see how you could relax and enjoy life if you are having to stick to one.
Have decided that at the moment i'm happy to keep developing my own/Georges routine naturally and see what we can achieve over the next few weeks.

 

[Squeakz]

we gave joh a routine from about 3-4 weeks. it was difficult but between6.30-7.39 he has a bath and then changed and ready to bed and then we give him a feed and then put him to bed. at first he would scream and cry and we would go up every couple of minutes and give him a dummy settle him, but never pick him up and mess about, and then come down and leve him again. At first it would take abotu an hour or so to settle him, and each time we made the fcrying slightly longer before we go up. Now, he goes to sleep as soon as he is in his cot, sometimes we have to run up if his dummy has fallen out. Tbh, for us we really needed the couple of hour inthe evening to be adults and chat and it also means that we dont have to worry about it later. Even if we go out in the eening we stick to the same routine but hell be in his car seat and he will still just drop off to sleep!

J used to be the same during the day and we tried to make sure that we 'caught' his tiredness quickly, gave him a dummy and a blanket on the his little chair and sit with him, stroke his face and eventually eh just drifted off. nowadays if hes tired and goes on his chair he will drift off almost straight away! it is difficult and perseverance is pivotal but just keep with it. when it does happen its wonderful and it will.

XXXXXX

 

[frankie707]

Thanks, G has a cold at the moment so not going to force anything on him until he's over that but i'll probably start doing what you've just described so he gradually learns a bedtime routine and how to get himself to sleep.
He's done the last two nights in his moses basket on top of his cotbed to get him used to his room so i've started the process, just hard without DH to help me establish things.

 

[isobel84]

i must say that Noa is so brilliant and thats prob thanks to Demba.
Noa goes to bed 8.30 (on the dot) without any trouble and even if hes awake, he knows when he is laying in his basket, nightlight is on, mobile is on waves-sound and he got a rabbit that plays a lullybynext to him - every night i do the same, no other time of the day does he have any of this and he knows it night time and he goes to sleep himself.
Demba was very much "leave him Evelina or he will learn you pick him up when he cries" and even tho it was hard, i left him and soon he was like a diferent baby. (if he was really really crying i sat with him n stroked him til he calmed down)
Only time he cries now is if he is overtired, but then i have to leave him aswell as picking him up just unsettle him even more.

Leaving a baby to cry is not for everyone, ive gone trough it and thank god- it worked.
I hope you find a way that works fot you

 

[frankie707]

Where do you put your babies for daytime sleeps? And did you do controlled crying for daytime naps or just for night times?

 

[isobel84]

daytime Noa sleeps in the pram or on the floor on his gym. Daytime Noa sleeps whenever he wants, if he is tired i leave him alone as i know he needs to sleep xx