Not getting married

[skairdykat]

Rob and I have been together for 9 years. We are so happy together and have no intention of getting married. We are 'married' in every way anyway apart from the official way iykwim. Joint bank account, house together, kids, dog lol. It just hasn't really bothered us at all. Just a but of paper would make no difference to our situation at all so why bother?

Anyone else living in sin and loving it?

 

[LisaJ1986]

We're similar. Together 4.5years, baby, joint bank account mortgage.
Getting married is too expensive apparently. I'd like to think maybe one day, but i don't know. I just don't like having a different surname to my family.

 

[skairdykat]

You could change it be deed poll like DebbieM did

 

[Mildly]

Me too

OH would like to get married but I'm happy the way we are. I'm not really a wedding type person. I wish there was a way you could get married just by signing a contract and sending it off in the post - I'm not really a fan of the public declaration thing! The inheritance tax laws are the only benefit to being married in my opinion. We've been together 11 years now but we must remember to go and make wills now that we have Oscar especially when we buy a house next year. If our assets exceeded the Inheritance tax exemption we would probably elope but I wouldn't change my surname, I'm too used to it now!

 

[skairdykat]

Glad it's not just me

 

[claire2711]

Im the same as Lisa, I just don't like having a different name to OH and LO

Does anyone know how much is costs to change your name and how ya do it?

Its just so expensive to get married!!

 

[lea m]

Me! We did plan a wedding (but only because we wanted a big party and pretty dress lol) but just cant be arsed with all the planning and the money can be spent on so much more better things lol!
I changed my name and title by deed poll so Im Mrs Mottershead now anyways! I have a piece of paper to say so lol and we're having a party to celebrate 10 years together next week (though our anniversary was on the 17th Oct lol) so really what am I missing out on?! I have a party, I have a pretty dress (well actually have a wedding dress too anyone wanna buy it!? hahahaha) I have the piece of paper but I also have the £7000 minimum we would have spent!

Claire2711 I changed my name online! It cost i think £20 !

http://www.nationaldeedpollservices.org.uk/

Nope not even £20!

 

[trixipaws]

been with my boyf since 2000, got a joint mortgage, joint bank account, and of course a child together so iv often said of him "he's like a husband to me"

i wouldnt rule it out tho i think it might be nice to have a special day but that one day of ur life is if its worth doing then u wanna go all out so as at the moment we cant afford that (as we'd want to do it somewhere exotic and then have a massive party back in the UK!)

it is something i daydream about sometimes millie as my little bridesmaid aww!

 

[Misslarue]

We are too. We've been together 8 years in December.
I always wanted to get married but for various reasons it never happened. It just seems a bit late now. When I was a little girl and dreamed of my wedding day I was in my early 20's, just starting out in life. I wasn't 31 with a child!

I also have a little problem with the promise to stay together forever bit. I would like to mean it and I am sure on the day I will, but no one can predict the future and I have no idea what's around the corner. I would feel wierd promising forever when I mean for the time being, depending on future circumstances! If we ever do get married I will ask for that bit to be cut out
Having said all that I still like the idea of marriage, if only so that OH, I and Dan all have the same surname.

 

[Miss.Monroe]

hands up over here! We have been together for 6 years live together, joint bills dog, baby bla bla. Before Sophie came along we had planned to get married this xmas (this was a couple of years ago) but just cant afford it. Now we live as were married anyway i dont see the point. I think it would add unnecesary preassure.

 

[mary70]

i was the same as you ladies for 22 years until we got married last year and i just felt that i needed the security of marriage in case anything happened to either of us, we went to see a solicitor and couldnt belive how complicated it made it if anything happened and we wernt married, i was under the inpression that the common law thing existed but was informed it was a load of rubbish and didnt mean a thing

 

[kelsey]

I'm same, joint bank, 4 kids , dog and i changed my surname via deedpoll.

 

[jennifer1981]

WE are EXACTLY the same. Dont get me wrong i would love to be married (but more so to share the same surname as OH and LO)... there are just more important things to spend our money on at the mo

 

[leckershell]

We dont have a joint bank account as my OH has previous financial problems (not big ones) and I dont want to be linked to that, so we have our own accounts (and loans ). Otherwise we have a rented house and Ryan, and been together about 2 and a half years. We'd get married but it's the cost, and if I'm gonna do it I'll do it nicely (not huge huge but not little either). That deed poll site is very interesting though - not having the same surname as Ryan and OH is my biggest bugbear.

 

[lea m]

i was the same as you ladies for 22 years until we got married last year and i just felt that i needed the security of marriage in case anything happened to either of us, we went to see a solicitor and couldnt belive how complicated it made it if anything happened and we wernt married, i was under the inpression that the common law thing existed but was informed it was a load of rubbish and didnt mean a thing

Thats the main reason why I know at some point in the future we will! I cant believe I wouldnt even have a say (if OH's family were horrid lol) on how my Joe would be treated after death etc! They really should make the common law thing a real thing lol!

 

[Magic Monkey]

I am married so can't really join in this! But I just wanted to say that if you aren't married you really need to make sure you have a will, as your parents remain your next of kin, therefore if anything was to happen to either of you, the parents would inherit their half of everything (house etc).

Also, if you don't wnat to get married beacuse of the fuss, why not just go to a registry office and do it? Friends of mine got married, took just their children and went to Pizza Hut afterwards! Then told everyone else in passing at a later date!

 

[Betula]

We've been together for over three years and are engaged, but who knows when we'll get round to getting married. It's so expensive and to be honest it doesn't affect us as we aren't religious. Mum keeps trying to talk us into getting married before the baby's born, but I think the next time she tries I'm going to tell her that we won't at all if she continues to nag.
It'll happen eventually but at the moment we have more important things to spend money on.

 

[HollyHobby]

I used to think like that but then one day just knew we should get married, havnt looked back since.
he was anti-marriage and so was I, never thought we'd have kids either, thought we'd be like selfish and cool, very anti norm!

 

[BeckyJ]

im going to change my name by deed poll if we are not married by the time summer starts school, its not that we dont want to marry its just that its a lot of exspense for one day

 

[mary70]

it only has to be as expensive as you make it we got married last year and it cost £400 and it could have cost alot less than that if we had wanted