Mum isn't happy..

[Rachey]

about OH and I getting a flat!

We had our own flat for over a year but moved back to Mums 6 weeks ago until we found somewhere else.. just by luck somewhere came up round the corner for a good price and we decided to go for it really pleased!!

It's ok at my Mums and I'm grateful that they let us stay etc but my little brother and sister are in and out the room all the time, OH doesn't like to just go and help himself to things around the house , there's 6 of us all sharing one bathroom(which is murder in the mornings) and it can only get harder when baby comes..

But anyway, since I'd mentioned to my Mum that we're moving out she's been really quiet, then today she asked why we were moving out? I said that me and OH just thought it was the best thing for us, so we have our own space etc and for baby coming Also said that it means that my little brother and sister aren't being woken up by baby in the night when they have school the next morning! And being close to her means she is always close by, and can see baby lots

She then just said that she thinks we're doing the wrong thing and walked away...

I don't mean to sound ungrateful, it's great that my Mum and stepdad were letting us stay with them and I appreciate it but she doesn't seem to understand where I'm coming from atall when I say that we need our own space.. She just starts asking why and what has she done wrong?

I don't see what's so bad about us moving out? Or what we're doing wrong, surely it's the best thing for everyone? We can manage ourselves financially so I don't see the problem..

Sorry about long post, it's just really getting me down. Wish she could just be happy and look forward to being a nana

 

[purplehippy]

I'm sure she'll come round, it just sounds like she loves having you there. You are entitled to your own space, you are about to become a family in your own right. But she sounds like she just needs an adjustment period - maybe she had it all planned out in her head, what it would be like, and now she has to rethink it it's been a bit of a shock. I'm sure she'll come round. Just remind her constantly that she's loved and that you will still see her a lot.

 

[jodied]

I agree with purple hippy xx

 

[xx emma xx]

Yeah I agree too. She has probably got excited about having yous there and looking orward tothe baby. She will no doubt miss having you around too. Mums don't like seeing there kids move out. My mum struggled last year when I left, I was last to go and think she got as they call it 'empty nest syndrome'. I actually still feel guilty but think she has came round more. Xx

 

[nmf1987]

yeah she probably was thinking you being there she could be with you for everything with baby and help you out etc. parents are funny things. she will be fine when she gets used to not having you there again.

it hasn't been that long that you have been back so she will get used to it quite quickly. xxx

 

[purplehippy]

it hasn't been that long that you have been back so she will get used to it quite quickly. xxx

I'm with NMF!

 

[riotfox]

I agree with all the other ladies. I'm sure she will come round soon and see that it is best that you have your own space. xx

 

[Rachey]

Yeah I think she's just upset cause she was looking forward to baby coming, hopefully she realizes that she will still see him all the time! We're only round the corner I've got a few bits and bobs still to pick up for baby at the weekend so maybe I should ask her to come with me so she knows I still want her to be involved and I'm not trying to push her away

I think she's worried cause she was young when she had me(she was 16), and she had to manage everything on her own cause my dad was a tosser, always out drinking and was into drugs and was really horrible to her. She knows my OH is nothing like the way my Dad was but I suppose it will still worry her!

I think you are all right though, she should come round soon enough! I hope

 

[PinkPanther]

I've got a few bits and bobs still to pick up for baby at the weekend so maybe I should ask her to come with me so she knows I still want her to be involved and I'm not trying to push her away

I think that's a good idea hun, make her feel involved. It sounds like your mum was looking forward to you all being in her home and now has to come round to the idea of you's not being there. She'll come round once she gets used to the idea.

 

[Nanc]

I agree with the others, she is probably dead excited about the baby being there and her helping, and has imagined it all. Now she will have to visit, it's not quite the same for her. She will come around. you are doing the right thing, you def need your own space. Congratulations on the flat, it will be great for you. x

 

[teampc]

as others have said i expect she was just looking forward to baby being there and being able to help you with everything

maybe try explaining to her that you arent moving out because of anything to do with her, its not because she has doen anything wrong, its just because you were used to your own place already and you want to be set up again in your own home for bringing up the baby.
Tell her you found somewhere close so that she can still be as involved as she wants to be

I def think inviting her out for a bit of baby shopping will help, might remind her you still need her