Just need a bit of a moan about hubbys family- am finding them a total nightmare at the moment!
Hubby's brother is getting married- it was supposed to be July this year, but they were talked out of it (they are a young couple with two children living in a council flat), but people (mother-in-law) telling them they should be using any money they had to buy a house. So that was cancelled, despite them having shelled out on deposits etc. Then, we were told it would be in Cyprus in October. I run a very large dance school, so term time is very awkward for me, so I already started making arrangements. It was pointed out to them that it would be very expensive for their guests, & slightly awkward for us, with a 8month old baby (mother-in-law suggested that we wouldn't bother taking our daughter with us- wtf???). Then, it became Easter holidays 2014- a very expensive time for it, but date-wise, easy for me. Then it became May 2014 (booked, without anyone telling us the date- the first we knew, was when my husband received a phone call at work from the travel agents asking for a deposit!). This is a very difficult time for me, as it is term-time, & just weeks before a huge show that I put on, involving a cast of 300, & an audience of about 2000. Plus the fact that it would cost us over £2K. Again, it was suggested that we wouldn't take Molly. There is no way, I am leaving my little one at home, & buggering off on holiday for a week!! Plus, they all assumed that my parents would have her whilst we were away- er, my parents both have full-time jobs?? I suggested that I might not be able to go, & hubby, not keen to go without me & Molly, said he would go for just 3 days, instead of 10, & stay in a different hotel. Not unreasonable, I don't think. All hell broke loose- his oarents started saying that they wouldn't go, then his sister said she wouldn't go, & the thing ends up getting cancelled again!!
Everything went quiet for a while- every time we see his parents, his mum bitches on at me, about 'this bloody wedding', which I am not comfortable with, so I now dread going round there. We get moaned at for not going round there enough (they have been to our house maybe 5 times in 4years), & every time we do, my hubby gets an email asking why I was 'quiet'! It's because I don't want to sit there & slag people off, so I have nothing to say!
So, we went round for a bbq a couple of weeks ago. We try to go inbetween Molly's naps, doing it so that she can nap in the car (it's a 50min drive). This, apparently has been moaned about, as has the fact that we won't take her round in the evenings, because his mum believes that routine for babies is ridiculous, so she seems to think that we should keep our 6month old out til all hours. Anyway, I digress, this bbq was a nightmare- we arrived, & my hubby instantly has to start cooking the bbq food. His mum started crying, saying that no one was helping her (he was doing all the cooking, there was only salad to put out), then they wouldn't eat with us, saying that they don't like bbqs, & would eat later. Odd, & very uncomfortable. Anyway, another wedding date was suggested- November, 10yrs to the day since they met. Lovely, I went away & started sorting cover as it's during term time. Then the usual mails about how quiet I was appear, & how hubbys' dad didn't get a cuddle with Molly (she was sat on the floor for about 2hrs- it's not like I was cuddling her to me the whole time!).
Yesterday, it transpires that, actually now, it's a different date in November. We weren't told, it just came up in an email. It turns out, that this is the same date that hubby has booked a surprise weekend away for us, for my birthday, with a West End show. My parents are booked to babysit, the hotel & tickets are paid for, & the hotel is booked. Hubby is really upset, as it is all non-refundable, & he will lose about £200. It is also to celebrate the fact that we have been together 10yrs. He's gutted as he has had to tell me. He has said about it to his family, in the hope that the wedding date will go back to where it was, but apparently everything has been booked!
Now, he is getting abusive messages from his sister, & his mum is refusing to speak to him!! Wtf??? I am so angry with all of them- they treat my hubby horribly, & give us NO help with our little one. They didn't even come round to meet her until she was 7 days old. I had a tough labour, she was poorly in NICU, & we were kept in hospital, & we heard nothing from them.
I don't want to go anywhere near the stupid wedding- I'm fed up with all the hassle. Whatever happens, the whole thing is ruined. I am trying really hard to be neutral, so as not to upset hubby further, but it's impossible!
Sorry for the MASSIVELY long post- no need to reply, I just wanted a rant! And breathe!!!
Hubby's brother is getting married- it was supposed to be July this year, but they were talked out of it (they are a young couple with two children living in a council flat), but people (mother-in-law) telling them they should be using any money they had to buy a house. So that was cancelled, despite them having shelled out on deposits etc. Then, we were told it would be in Cyprus in October. I run a very large dance school, so term time is very awkward for me, so I already started making arrangements. It was pointed out to them that it would be very expensive for their guests, & slightly awkward for us, with a 8month old baby (mother-in-law suggested that we wouldn't bother taking our daughter with us- wtf???). Then, it became Easter holidays 2014- a very expensive time for it, but date-wise, easy for me. Then it became May 2014 (booked, without anyone telling us the date- the first we knew, was when my husband received a phone call at work from the travel agents asking for a deposit!). This is a very difficult time for me, as it is term-time, & just weeks before a huge show that I put on, involving a cast of 300, & an audience of about 2000. Plus the fact that it would cost us over £2K. Again, it was suggested that we wouldn't take Molly. There is no way, I am leaving my little one at home, & buggering off on holiday for a week!! Plus, they all assumed that my parents would have her whilst we were away- er, my parents both have full-time jobs?? I suggested that I might not be able to go, & hubby, not keen to go without me & Molly, said he would go for just 3 days, instead of 10, & stay in a different hotel. Not unreasonable, I don't think. All hell broke loose- his oarents started saying that they wouldn't go, then his sister said she wouldn't go, & the thing ends up getting cancelled again!!
Everything went quiet for a while- every time we see his parents, his mum bitches on at me, about 'this bloody wedding', which I am not comfortable with, so I now dread going round there. We get moaned at for not going round there enough (they have been to our house maybe 5 times in 4years), & every time we do, my hubby gets an email asking why I was 'quiet'! It's because I don't want to sit there & slag people off, so I have nothing to say!
So, we went round for a bbq a couple of weeks ago. We try to go inbetween Molly's naps, doing it so that she can nap in the car (it's a 50min drive). This, apparently has been moaned about, as has the fact that we won't take her round in the evenings, because his mum believes that routine for babies is ridiculous, so she seems to think that we should keep our 6month old out til all hours. Anyway, I digress, this bbq was a nightmare- we arrived, & my hubby instantly has to start cooking the bbq food. His mum started crying, saying that no one was helping her (he was doing all the cooking, there was only salad to put out), then they wouldn't eat with us, saying that they don't like bbqs, & would eat later. Odd, & very uncomfortable. Anyway, another wedding date was suggested- November, 10yrs to the day since they met. Lovely, I went away & started sorting cover as it's during term time. Then the usual mails about how quiet I was appear, & how hubbys' dad didn't get a cuddle with Molly (she was sat on the floor for about 2hrs- it's not like I was cuddling her to me the whole time!).
Yesterday, it transpires that, actually now, it's a different date in November. We weren't told, it just came up in an email. It turns out, that this is the same date that hubby has booked a surprise weekend away for us, for my birthday, with a West End show. My parents are booked to babysit, the hotel & tickets are paid for, & the hotel is booked. Hubby is really upset, as it is all non-refundable, & he will lose about £200. It is also to celebrate the fact that we have been together 10yrs. He's gutted as he has had to tell me. He has said about it to his family, in the hope that the wedding date will go back to where it was, but apparently everything has been booked!
Now, he is getting abusive messages from his sister, & his mum is refusing to speak to him!! Wtf??? I am so angry with all of them- they treat my hubby horribly, & give us NO help with our little one. They didn't even come round to meet her until she was 7 days old. I had a tough labour, she was poorly in NICU, & we were kept in hospital, & we heard nothing from them.
I don't want to go anywhere near the stupid wedding- I'm fed up with all the hassle. Whatever happens, the whole thing is ruined. I am trying really hard to be neutral, so as not to upset hubby further, but it's impossible!
Sorry for the MASSIVELY long post- no need to reply, I just wanted a rant! And breathe!!!
