In laws

[x-kirsty-x]

I've had enough of feeling second best. Every time we argue he makes sure I know that they're more important to him than I am. When they say jump he says how high. They're on the phone about 15 times a day for no reason at all and it doesnt matter if I need help with the kids or Im trying to have 2 minutes peace, he'll go off into another room and stay on the phone ages.

He throws it in my face that they have a great relationship and my parents didnt want me cos I was adopted. He says he likes them better than me cos they dont argue with him like I do.

Im sick of it

 

[M&Ms]

Oh hunni! First of all one of these

Can't believe he treats you like that, what a low down nasty thing to do when he makes digs about you being adopted. What a wanker! I think I would have let him go and stay gone when he went last week...

You don't need to be with a dickhead like that hun

Here have some more hugs, I think you deserve them!

 

[x-kirsty-x]

He's only like that when he's in a mood, I know he regrets saying it afterwards.

He just knows it'll hurt me, thats his main objective when we argue, once he's hurt me and made me cry its like job done and he decides to make up with me.

When we're not arguing he's absolutely amazing but when we do it gets out of hand. He's a pure mummy & daddys boy and it does my head in. Every time we argue he runs off to them. If there was room at their house he would've moved back home by now.

Alot of the time we get on great but when we argue it just reminds me of everything that I hate about him

 

[Babylicious]

cut the phone off

 

[mrs_tommo22]

oh for gods sake kirsty hes not being an arsehole again? tell him to have minuites off and stop being a wanker for one day!
If hos parents are that wonderful then tell him to go stay with them cos it sounds like your playing singloe mummy again!

Have a hug though babes, me and you are going through simiilar stuff sao i know how you feel.

 

[x-kirsty-x]

Yeah, again

I know I make him sound really really bad but he's not, for all his bad points he has a hundred good points, honest!

I just hate arguing with him and I get pissed off so I come on here and rant, half the time I read it back and I've made him out to be a complete prick.

Some of the shit he says is hurtful, thats why he says it. He says the things that he knows will get to me even if he doesnt mean it.

I dunno, when we're not arguing we're amazing together but when we do we take it to the extreme. I probably nag him too much and thats what starts an argument but I think thats just a woman thing

 

[Squiglet]

Oh dear.. that sounds horrid..

From what you say in your posts, I get the idea that when your relationship is good, its really good.. but when it's bad it's horrible. Are there more good times or bad times in your relationship? Do you argue more times than you spend quality time together?... Have you ever made a list of the reasons for and against staying with someone who seems to say such hurtful things, just to make you cry?. Sometimes, its not enough just to have someone love you some of the time... you deserve to have someone love you all of the time.

To have to be miserable and hurting most of time, isn't what life is all about. You have the right to be happy.

Is all the heartache you are suffering atm worth those few good times? If the answer is no.. you need to think about whether your relationship can be saved...and at the end of the day he has to work at that too....

Being adopted and then having that fact rubbed in your face isn't an act of love...even if he doesn't mean it, that is just down right wrong. Give him an ultimatum.. if he says it again...its over...then stick to it otherwise he will just keep saying it over and over again, and you will just keep being hurt. It will keep you down, destroy your confidence and you will feel worthless...when your are worth more than 10 of him, if he says such hurtful things.

 

[HappyAlice]

Aww Kirsty - men!
They can be such little boys can't they, never grow up properly
Hope things are OK now

 

[trixipaws]

aw thatts not nice of him