I hope you girls don't mind me asking for some advice

[FebMum2Be]

My sister went for her scan today at 13 weeks and unfortunately it was bad news

She has had some brown discharge today and slight cramps but isn't sure if this is the beginning of it.. She still has all pregnancy symptoms but she doesn't know what to look out for

She has been told to go back next week to discuss d+c and other things, but she's hoping it will happen naturally

I hope I don't upset anyone asking but just wondering what to look out for, did anyone else have brown discharge and cramping?

Thanks in advance x

 

[Princess81]

I wasn't as far on but had cramps to start with and then the discharge started followed by the blood. Your poor sister I hope they look after her xxx

 

[frankie247]

So sorry to hear about your sister. My first pregnancy also ended when we found no heartbeat at scan. I had no bleeding or cramping so had the DandC and really glad I did. Yeah bit scary having my first general anaesthetic but all the hospital staff were lovely, I woke up feeling absolutely fine, went home couple hours later, had a very tiny amount of spotting for a couple of hours, very mild cramping less than period pain and then I was physically fine. So if she does have the D&C it can be a good thing.

It took me a long time to get over the miscarriage, don't think I ever will, but it gets easier. Thinking of you all x

 

[fran.sudeep]

Hi, im sorry for what your sister is going through.

Every miscarriage is different and some can take quite a while to finish, which results in even more emotional heartache making it harder to move on and grieve.

I have just had a miscarriage yesterday i was 6 weeks 4 days, and i braved it out at home, it lasted a week of pain and bleeding, eventually i had to get my cervix opened by the doctor to release everything

I was praying for it to be over quickly.

I think D&C is the best option.

I really hope you sister is ok, maybe tell her about this site, i have found it really good and it is helping me in my grieving process.

You sound like a really good sister to be caring enough to do this for some advise for her.

 

[KarolinaMoon]

Hi,

Sorry to hear about your sister . I found out at my 12 week scan that I had a missed mc. From then, I waited about 2 weeks to mc naturally. I had no discharge or cramping until about 2 days before I actually miscarried. The discharge was brownish and quite light, then on 13th oct out of the blue I experienced increasingly bad cramps, and 'gushes' of bleeding and passing clots and tissue. The worst of my cramps occured just before I passed the gestational sac. It took about 5 hours during that day for the worst of it to pass, and then I had light bleeding for a few days after.
There are variations to what different people experience, and also how they wish to manage the mc. Some prefer natural, others d & c, and other's medical management. For me personally, I took a week or so to think it over, and weighed up the advise of my midwife, and what I had read about each. I decided natural was best for me, and looking back i think I made the right decision for me.
If you need any more advise, just ask....I hope your sister is coping ok, it sounds as though she has a great sister to support her through this xxxx

 

[netty]

i was 13 weeks when i found out at scan no heartbeat then MC'd about 5 days later, i had sudden painful cramps i had to call an ambulance as i was in agony but i had no painkillers at all until i went to hospital, i would recommend lots of rest and painkillers, if it gets too much dont be afraid to call an ambulance.

I really hope this passes quickly for her and I am so sorry to hear this news, hope my story helps

 

[FebMum2Be]

Thanks for taking the time out to help and share girls I know it's not easy so thank you x

She has been given a week to think it over and if she wants to do anything sooner she just has to call them.. She has so much to get her head around it probably hasnt sunk in yet.. I don't know what to say or what to do, I wish I could do something for her x

Thank you again girls it means a lot and will help her understand her options xx

 

[Samsgirl]

what happened to Karolinamoon is exactly like me.....i started on the friday night with brown discharge and then on the saturday night the cramps started and oh my god i knew there was something wrong. Then the red blood started and about 2 hours later the pain got very bad and then i passed baked bean......and then after that it was just like a period for me...lasted about a week. i think i was 'lucky' that i passed the sack and its contents (sorry but dunno how else to word it really without upsetting myself) all in one go....so i didnt have too much clotting after....

xxx

 

[TORino]

Sorry to hear about your sister

I found out at a scan on a Thursday that the pregnancy wasn't viable and decided over the weekend what to do. Ideally I wanted to wait for it to happen naturally but I just didn't know how long that was going to take so I went in and had the medical management. The d&c was not offered to me. And I didn't like the idea of that anyway tbh

I went in on the monday evening and took the first tablet and went back on the Wednesday for the rest of the tablets. It took from between 8-11.30 to pass everything and it all came away at once so I was lucky. Either I got off lightly with the cramps or I have a high pain threshold because I don't remember feeling that much pain like others have described. I would choose this option again if I needed too.

I hope it can be over quickly for her x

 

[FebMum2Be]

Thanks girls I hope im not upsetting you by asking about your experience, this is just a new thing for us x

She has texted me and said she is going to go for the d and c, she has my 4 year old nephew to think about (her words) and she wants it over with she said she can't wait around waiting for it to happen..

She is ringing the hospital in the morning so we will know then what date this will happen

My poor BIL has brought her some flowers he doesn't really know what to do either, she knows I'm here and when she is ready she just has to pick up the phone or come over x

 

[dyscochick]

oh poor love, its such a tough thing to go through. Do warn her though that although the d&c will 'deal' with it straight away a) there might be a long wait (I was told 2 weeks so went with medical) and that she might continue bleeding for a couple of weeks after. Psychologically it does mean that its gone though. But from what I've read on here and my own experience no path is easy. to you and her, I hope she comes to you for support and her husband xxx

 

[netty]

i hope she gets throguh this she is lucky to have someone as concerned as you hun, there are really no words for this kinda thing, it just takes time xxx

 

[FebMum2Be]

The earliest appointment is next Wednesday, BILs mum works at the hospital so is trying to make it happen sooner and will be keeping an eye out for cancellations, thanks again girls xo

 

[CARNAT22]

My M/c's have all been earlier than your sisters but have all been natural.

I waited 3 weeks for the first one to occur though and am not sure if I could cope with that mental torture again.

The waiting made a crappy, sad, scary time in my life 100 times worse!

On the upside I did not have to have any medical intervention [other than about 12 internal scans!]

I hope your sister (and yourself!) are doing OK?

xxxxxxxx

 

[fran.sudeep]

Hope you are all ok

 

[FebMum2Be]

I am gutted, I can't begin to imagine how she, and all of you girls that have been through it feel, she's not doing too good today x

 

[netty]

it is such an awful ordeal to go through, i felt just numb all i did was cry and cry. I hope shes ok, these things take time but it does get better. I never thought it would but it really does, the ladies here are my rock lol i dont know what i would have done without their support

 

[Nurse 26]

Sorry to hear about your sis, its really horrible thing to go through, with my second MMC i had brown discharge and cramping for about 2 weeks so eventually had to get the d&c again as things just wouldnt start.

I hope she is ok xx

 

[FebMum2Be]

She knows about here she asks me to ask things but I've told her it's a great place for support if she wants to join x

One of her friends told a girl that my sister knows but isn't close to. She facebooked her last night saying "sorry for your loss" my sister was so upset, I don't think she would have minded if it had of been a close friend but this person is a big mouth who she isn't "friends" with..

Nurse if you don't mind me asking, what's the recovery like afterwards? Just so I know wether to take my nephew for a night or 2 to let her rest x

 

[netty]

i had loads of people sidle up to me to ''express concern'' when they just wanted gossip urgh makes me sick i hate people like that!!

The recovery is dependant on each person, usually it is the mental effect that tskes more to heal rather than the physical side of things.