How do you REALLY feel right now about TTC?

[Olive]

OMG - I thought I was the only one. Earlier I said to myself "if there's a pack of Frazzles left, I'll get my BFP!" PATHETIC! X

Lol thank god!!! That's a double whammy too - a bfp and a bag of frazzles xxx

 

[ScotchEgg]

omg...it's like i wrote that....everything you said and feel is exactly the same as me.. sp glad i am not alone xxx

Thank you so much for saying that. I sometimes feel guilty on here for the times that something makes me glad it hasn't happened yet

 

[Samsgirl]

omg...it's like i wrote that....everything you said and feel is exactly the same as me.. sp glad i am not alone xxx

Thank you so much for saying that. I sometimes feel guilty on here for the times that something makes me glad it hasn't happened yet

it's natural to worry...it's a HUGE decision and huge change to your lifestyle....i know exactly how you feel......it's about 2 months since we decided to try for a baby and i am coming round to the decision a bit more now....but i still poo'd my pants last month when i thought i had fallen straight away! ha ha

i also feel guilty cos sometimes i think...'a couple more months trying will be fine' then i worry that 'what if i cant get pregnant' its just a huge rollercoaster of emotions.....

i'm absolutely terrified of labour amd i mean TERRIFIED so i think that has something to do with it and also the thought of having my very own teenager!!! ha ha

I'm sure it will all be fine...i have a very supportive OH who is very excited. we are very very strong and i think he's going to pop the question soon.....i cant wait....2 years ago i was single and had been for 6 years on and off and was worried i was never gonna meet the one. 2 years later i have found him, we are going to get married (soon i hope!) and trying for a baby.....mad how your life can change....

ooo sorry...long post!!

xx

 

[Ndobins]

Dito all the above and some!!

Our baby would have been due on Saturday, feel so bad at mo. keep crying all the time, thinking its all my fault all over again. I got BFP before, so why not again? we are just impatient and want it so much.

I have asked my OH to cut down on drinking, its a 2 way thing and you have to be in it together, good and bad. Whats the point in us testing all the time and worrying if they dont cut back on booze a bit!! They can drink for 9 months when we get our BFP. So i'm all for asking very politely to cut back!!

Good luck to all for an xmas BFP xxxx

 

[Olive]

I have asked my OH to cut down on drinking

My OH is very touchy if I mention how much he drinks. He's not like an alcoholic but does drink every night (admitedly that sounds v.bad!). I find it incredibly frustrating.

xxx

 

[Kezzamunster]

Morning girls

Firstly wanted to say what a fab thread this is, just brilliant & it's nice to know that we all have our worries & it's not just me I've been sitting on the bus looking like Churchill nodding away

Well my OH & I have been together for 12 years & have only just started TTC. There has always been something that's meant we haven't tried, change of jobs, courses at college etc so I resided myself to the fact that I didn't want children as it was never going to happen & happily told people this but it's my real friends that knew this wasn't the case. Now I can't keep that thought up, I would of had children years ago & now feel that as I had to wait for OH to be ready that this has ruined my chances & it won't happen then I feel incredibly guilty because was his dream to get his degree & fab job etc

My other biggest concern is that the OH won't be around much, he always has time to help other people & always doing things for them & he's always working late or having drinks after work. Although my parents ard still together but for the first 15 years of my life he was never around, either working or fishing or mainly in the pub, 365 days of the year actually so I've spent the most important years of my life without my dad there & it's awful & I'm petrified that history will repeat itself

I also worry that when it happens & my body goes through the changes that my OH won't find me as attractive or love me as much

I worry so much about things out of my control then worry that worrying about the above is stopping me from
conceiving........enough to drive you crazy

I hope these don't sound silly at all

xxx

 

[maybe baby]

Hey ladies,

Thanks for all the replies to this thread, it's good to know we all feel pretty similar about things at times. I'm a bit worrier too. I worry about everything. Confession - my worst "thing" at the moment is i'll say things to myself like, if x happens/doesn't happen, then it means I will/won't get my bfp. Lol. Every night I drive over a bridge over a train line and I look down and think if I see a train, it means I won't get a bfp. How insane is that?! Honestly, my brain is overloaded and pretty strange! lol. I drive myself crazy. Bet no one can say they do that! ha ha.

Baby dust to everyone.xxxxxxxx



Lou - pm'd you back.xxxx

OMG - I thought I was the only one. Earlier I said to myself "if there's a pack of Frazzles left, I'll get my BFP!" PATHETIC! X

I'd say that's cheating, everyone knows the Salt 'n 'Vinegar Squares and Chipsticks go before the Frazzles!

xx

 

[Kezzamunster]

Hear hear maybe

 

[Ndobins]

We have now decided to take a step back from OPK's, xmas coming up and we both have parties. U never know....relax, few drinkies...!!! it may just happen because we are relaxed. So still TTC big time, but going to both stop drinking and be more strict in the new yr.

Once we decided that we both felt better.

 

[Olive]

that sounds like a good plan to me ndobins xx

 

[MissJuly10]

One day I feel impatient and the next I feel thankful that it hasn’t happened yet because I really don’t know how I’ll cope with the change involved with becoming a mother and (big deal to me) I’m not 100% sure I want to share my OH’s attention.

Then I tell myself that’s all silly and I can’t wait for it to happen.

I found it occupied my every waking thought for the first 2 months, then I found here and I’ve been able to get it out 2 or 3 times a day and then get on with life. I think it was not saying anything to anyone – having a big secret – that made it so hard.

I feel guilty that I can’t give my husband the thing he wants most in the world. I want it too, but I know he has wanted it for years and I made us be so careful because just one sperm could get through and now that one sperm isn’t getting through!

And I vary wildly between yearning for it and not wanting it to happen. I know it’s fear of the unknown in part, but I think it’s mainly that I’m so happy with my life and my relationship that I don’t really want that to change. I know a child will be hard work and put pressure on our relationship, but it’s so fun right now I’m really scared of that change.

But most of all I LOVE the closeness that the extra s*x has brought to our relationship and how in love we both are all the time at the moment and it reminds me that if it takes a few more months it’s not so bad.

omg...it's like i wrote that....everything you said and feel is exactly the same as me.. sp glad i am not alone xxx

That's how I feel too!!

I have days where I want it so badly and then days when I think "Oh crap...what about when our *baby* is no longer a baby and is a moody 16 year old?" and I wonder if that's what I want, even though I know deep down, I do, I just question myself all the time and I worry that I'll be a crap mummy.

I think this is made worse when I panic with my sister's baby, when he cries and screams and turns a weird shade of red, I have no idea what to do and I quickly pass him off to someone and end up sitting there wondering what the heck I'll do with my own child. Then I remind myself that when it's my child, I'll know all about him - how to soothe him, what he needs etc because my maternal instincts will kick in good and proper.

I worry about the time I have alone with hubby being lost and then regretting having a baby so soon after we'd married but then again, who knows how long it will take us to fall pregnant? And I know my husband would never let our marriage get left behind (for want of a better phrase!).

I worry about the effect of TTC on myself, my husband and us as a couple just married. I wonder if it's too much emotionally - given that my last cycle of 66 days had us both in tears - can we go through this every single time? And he tells me YES we can because it'll be so worth it.

I feel EXACTLY the same about feeling guilty for not falling pregnant straight away and giving hubby the baby he's wanted for so long. He's been ready to be a daddy for years and I've only just decided that I want to be a mummy and it breaks my heart that it's not as easy as I thought. It hurts even more when people around us tell us how they forgot one pill and fell pregnant and then decide to add "Awwwwww I'm sure it's your turn next".

I HATE that! I get frustrated when people ask us whether we're pregnant or not because I look at my husband and I see his disappointment being brought up again and again, every time someone asks that stupid question.

I feel like TTC is so unfair sometimes - especially yesterday when AF snuck up on me after 66 days!

Cor, I've rambled on a bit, sorry!

x x

 

[Samsgirl]

it's never rambling...it's great to get out how you're feeling...i feel the same about whether i want a teenager....ha ha......so i know where you are coming from there. But I just think I will be older and even stronger then to deal with all that.....plus that teenager will have been my baby so i will love him/her unconditionally. so when they are screaming that they hate me...i will be able to take it. lol...i hope!!! xxx

 

[MissJuly10]

Lol if I can't handle it, I'll get my hubby to sort it out haha!

I know what you mean and I agree, bottling my feelings or worries up does me no good so it's great to come on here and vent...even though I do feel bad sometimes for offloading onto everyone here! But I know that no matter what, I'm never alone. x x

 

[Samsgirl]

Lol if I can't handle it, I'll get my hubby to sort it out haha!

I know what you mean and I agree, bottling my feelings or worries up does me no good so it's great to come on here and vent...even though I do feel bad sometimes for offloading onto everyone here! But I know that no matter what, I'm never alone. x x

exactly......when i'm on here my OH says to me 'are you bfp'ing'....he he......bless xx

 

[MissJuly10]

Lol! My hubby doesn't know about the forum, he'd probably think I'm mad lol. I've already alienated him with BBT, CM, OV, HPTS, OPKS, EWCM, charting, cycle days, symptom spotting etc etc! x x

 

[Samsgirl]

Lol! My hubby doesn't know about the forum, he'd probably think I'm mad lol. I've already alienated him with BBT, CM, OV, HPTS, OPKS, EWCM, charting, cycle days, symptom spotting etc etc! x x

mine sometimes reads posts and i say 'oi you, go away..its ladies things...'..lol xx

 

[MissJuly10]

Lol, aw! I think my hubby would think we're talking a whole other language...Which we probably are! x x