i feel in love with kacy straight away, i couldn't wait until matty and my mum had gone home so i could be on my own with her, i put her down in the labour room so i could get changed, but after that i just held her all the time i was in hospital playing with her fingers (thinking she has long fingers) and playing with her toes
How did you feel when you first saw/met your baby?
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This is such an interesting thread.
I felt love at first sight but I was so out of it after such a long labour and difficulties getting the placenta out. It was a long time before I got a cuddle, when I did it was very short lived because I suddenly needed to throw up. For the next few hours I was in and out of consciousness.
I didn't have much contact with him for the first couple of days, it was horrible. I still felt so much love for him though.
I just hope the next one I'll be more with it so that I can enjoy that time immediately after birth and be aware of what's going on around me.
I felt love at first sight but I was so out of it after such a long labour and difficulties getting the placenta out. It was a long time before I got a cuddle, when I did it was very short lived because I suddenly needed to throw up. For the next few hours I was in and out of consciousness.
I didn't have much contact with him for the first couple of days, it was horrible. I still felt so much love for him though.
I just hope the next one I'll be more with it so that I can enjoy that time immediately after birth and be aware of what's going on around me.
Good thread! I felt nothing which I really wasn't expecting. I then worried that I was unnatural. My OH wasn't with me during labour, my mum was with me but when he came in and took Elliott in his arms and I looked over at the two of them I could see my OH falling in love with him instantly. I remember thinking that I'd remember seeing that moment forever but I felt like I was watching it from behind glass somehow, I was distant and vague. When I got up to the ward I felt very protective of Elliott, I didn't want to put him down and I kind of instinctively bonded but it didn't feel like falling in love, I think that has been a slower burn if you know what I mean? I wish I knew that that was how it is sometimes as I agonised for the first few weeks that I was horrible and strange when now I know that it's a normal reaction.
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I felt nothing to begin with. I was so tired & shocked by it all & relieved it was over, which I just couldn't get my head round that I saw him & just though 'Oh'. I was just focusing on the fact that I had bad tears & had to go to theatre.
When he was put on my chest I was kissing him but I was away with the fairies & still being sick so didn't want to hold him & wanted my DH to hold him as I had done for 9 months!
During the night whilst on the ward I was holding him & felt sorry for him because I felt helpless because I didn't know what I was doing. I guess it was the next day when I fell in love when he looked me in the eyes for the first time....
When he was put on my chest I was kissing him but I was away with the fairies & still being sick so didn't want to hold him & wanted my DH to hold him as I had done for 9 months!
During the night whilst on the ward I was holding him & felt sorry for him because I felt helpless because I didn't know what I was doing. I guess it was the next day when I fell in love when he looked me in the eyes for the first time....
Sarah&Braydon
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Wen i was in labour Braydons heart beat dropped extremely low and my BP went very high so wen i gave Birth i Was just so glad B was ok and couldnt believe how perfect he was
michelle82
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I honestly thought i would be all blubby and OMG instead it was like thank f**k for that they got him out then after a few days it was like what have we done! But now all I feel is absolute love and I understand fully about the maternal instinct and need to protect our babies, I dont think it comes on straight away for a lot of people
I clicked nothing....
I so expected a little version of me or OH so when I looked into this little face that was totally his own and resembled no-one I kept asking 'are you sure this is my one?', 'is this definitely the one they took out of me?'
I was a little spaced, and felt bad that my OH obviously fell in love there and then and I wasn't that bothered. Until about 24 hours later when we were cuddling on the bed and I couldn't stop sniffing his head!
I so expected a little version of me or OH so when I looked into this little face that was totally his own and resembled no-one I kept asking 'are you sure this is my one?', 'is this definitely the one they took out of me?'
I was a little spaced, and felt bad that my OH obviously fell in love there and then and I wasn't that bothered. Until about 24 hours later when we were cuddling on the bed and I couldn't stop sniffing his head!
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I feel greatful so many of you are sharing your experiences and making me and I'm sure many others realise they are not alone when they felt nothing when they saw their baby. It's not the fairytale I expected at all. Df was so mad eup with it all, he had tears in his eyes, and my mum just kept hugging me and telling me how proud she wa sof me, but I was just in shock.
Bloody scary having babies
Bloody scary having babies
michelle82
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yeah buts its ok for our OH they havent just spent the day in labour and had millions of people prodding at them
LittleMinx said:I don't know, I think my OH had a genuinly traumatic time seeing me in so much pain. The drugs I took have taken the edge of some of the memories, but I do feel for what he went through too
We were talking about Seren's birth the other day and when I had to have the epidural I was hysterical and really upset and he said that he has never felt so helpless in his life and he never wants to feel like that again
hahaha keely! when hayden was coming down the midwife said "your child has red hair" me and OH looked at each other and i said i wont push anymore then! lol i was laughing..then i got another mother of a contraction that wiped the smile right off my face!!
Hayden is a bit red mostly blonde (the little hair he has left anyway) but it has red tones!
i loved him straight away i couldnt stop staring at him he didnt leave my sight till i went in the bath then i came straight back to stare him some more! i'm still staring! the novelty wears off when he has a pooey nappy!
Hayden is a bit red mostly blonde (the little hair he has left anyway) but it has red tones!
i loved him straight away i couldnt stop staring at him he didnt leave my sight till i went in the bath then i came straight back to stare him some more! i'm still staring! the novelty wears off when he has a pooey nappy!
Its hard to explain really but i did sort of feel total resentment that i now had this little person toally relying on me and it felt as if my life was over as i had been so use to being able to go out and do what i wanted and having no worrys to then end up like this it took a little while for me to realise that it wasnt the end of the world and somehow i would get by with the help and support of my o/h and my family and after a time it became just a part of how my day to day life was to change and how it was to be really this applys to having both my lo's and for all the moaning and complaining i may do about how things are sometimes i wouldnt change a single moment
When I firt saw Nathan I felt nothing. It was prob coz my labour was so fast and he was 5 weeks early and it come as a bit of a shock.
A few hours later though when everyone had gone and I was left on my own with him I fell in love then I couldnt take my eyes off him, kept looking at him and how perfect he was till my mum came in about 2hrs later
A few hours later though when everyone had gone and I was left on my own with him I fell in love then I couldnt take my eyes off him, kept looking at him and how perfect he was till my mum came in about 2hrs later
fran_23 said:hahaha keely! when hayden was coming down the midwife said "your child has red hair" me and OH looked at each other and i said i wont push anymore then! lol i was laughing..then i got another mother of a contraction that wiped the smile right off my face!!
Hayden is a bit red mostly blonde (the little hair he has left anyway) but it has red tones!
i loved him straight away i couldnt stop staring at him he didnt leave my sight till i went in the bath then i came straight back to stare him some more! i'm still staring! the novelty wears off when he has a pooey nappy!
Awww thats lovely Fran, I hope I feel like you when I give birth and see my LO.
think i was very lucky as although i had a bit of a tricky, long labour, once i eventually got to the pushing part i had had my epidural for a few hours which had given me a rest and felt really in control. my midwife was the best too. she kept grabbing my hand so i could feel alex's head as it was crowning and we were all so excited as everyone had been sure i wouldnt make it naturally (was very nearly a section) so i really enjoyed that part.
they had to whip alex out quick at the end as he had the cord twice round his little neck which was why his heart rate kept dipping. but once she untangled him and was sure he was breathing she put him straight on to me. his eyes were wide open and he looked at me like - oh so you're my mummy?! me & dh both cried and dh hugged the both of us
was the most incredible thing - def love at first sight for me. i remember looking at his long fingers and thinking - those are my sons fingers - i love these fingers! (soppy cow!) .
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they had to whip alex out quick at the end as he had the cord twice round his little neck which was why his heart rate kept dipping. but once she untangled him and was sure he was breathing she put him straight on to me. his eyes were wide open and he looked at me like - oh so you're my mummy?! me & dh both cried and dh hugged the both of us
was the most incredible thing - def love at first sight for me. i remember looking at his long fingers and thinking - those are my sons fingers - i love these fingers! (soppy cow!) .
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Strangeness
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I didn't really get to see Aaron at first because of having an emergency c section I was out of it. Had been in hospital in labour for 2 days when it all went so fast. By the time I came round Aaron was a few hours old and I finally got to hold the tiny baby that laid next to me in his cot. When I saw him I couldn't really believe he was mine but I felt the over whelming need to protect him. Then my dh came in and took him off me and when I saw them together I melted. That's when I knew how much I loved him and my family was complete.
I think its really interesting how differently we all were & think alot of it depends on the labour & what kind of person we are.
I remember thinking "why are all these people crying over a baby?" when my family were visiting. I just couldnt understand it.
I do agree that it must be horrible for our partners also as my DH also said he felt so helpless and just wanted to take some of the pain for me (I would have quite freely given him some!
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but they are also very lucky that they can enjoy and cherish their first cuddle without feeling like they have just been to a torture chamber!
One thing I feel better about is if I do go on to have another I know that what I feel after is complelty normal & nothing to really worry about. I think it would have been alot easier if our midwife's had mentioned this before we had them so we didnt think that it had to be a fairytale ending.
At the time you really do think you are the only one who feels nothing for there baby. I am hoping it will be different next time though.
x
I remember thinking "why are all these people crying over a baby?" when my family were visiting. I just couldnt understand it.
I do agree that it must be horrible for our partners also as my DH also said he felt so helpless and just wanted to take some of the pain for me (I would have quite freely given him some!
) but they are also very lucky that they can enjoy and cherish their first cuddle without feeling like they have just been to a torture chamber!
One thing I feel better about is if I do go on to have another I know that what I feel after is complelty normal & nothing to really worry about. I think it would have been alot easier if our midwife's had mentioned this before we had them so we didnt think that it had to be a fairytale ending.
At the time you really do think you are the only one who feels nothing for there baby. I am hoping it will be different next time though.
x
